The lost episode of The Lone Ranger

[HopeHoops]

The Lone Ranger was relieving himself one morning and happened to do it upon a rattle snake. The snake was not amused. It bit him right on the head of his penis.

"TONTO!"

"Yes Keemosabe?"

"A rattle snake bit me on the tallywhacker. Ride into town and get the doctor, quickly!"

"YES Keemosabe!"

Tonto rode as fast as he could. The doctor was attending to a birth and couldn't come with him, but he was able to speak with Tonto for a few minutes.

"Doctor, rattle snake bite Keemosabe. What we do?"

"Tonto, I can't come with you because this woman is about to give birth. The only way to save him is to suck all of the venom out of the bite. Spit it out and keep sucking until nothing else comes out."

"Tonto understand. Thank you doctor."

Tonto raced back to the Lone Ranger.

"Tonto, thank God you're back. Where's the doctor?"

"Doctor no come. He give birth."

"Uh, right. What did he say?"

"Doctor say you going to die."

[Bucky]

1. If it was on the head of his penis, couldn't he get rid of the poison himself?

Perhaps, once again, I've inadvertantly revealed too much about myself.

[HopeHoops]

2. I think it is a given.

If you could, you would.