I'm so not fucking fucked.

[redqueen]

It's by choice though so I really can't complain.


(Sorry GiC )

[Deja Q]

1. Well, perhaps we can't get fucked together?

[redqueen]

4. Yeah that would kinda go against

the whole celibacy thing I got goin.

But I can dream!

[buzzycrumbhunger]

8. Ack--celibacy sucks!

Why would anyone choose it? Between the arsehole I jettisoned after 20-some years and my lack of confidence since, I've entered born-again-virgin territory and am none to happy about it. I live for the day I can say "Fuck me" as more than an expletive. Ahhh, to have two-person sex again. Celibacy is not natural. Sheesh!

[redqueen]

10. Why?

Cause I'm picky that's why!

You know... if that's really all you want, it's very easy.

[buzzycrumbhunger]

11. LOL--yeah, I know it should be

. . . but after 20-some years with an emotionally abusive dick, I have certain self esteem issues I must overcome before my desire for fuckage is overwhelmed by my mortification at the idea of having to get nekkid in front of a strange man. I'm gonna need the preliminary relationship and a generous lubrication with a fine single malt to get there, I'm afraid.

Sadly, I managed to be too young so missed the window of opportunity for the free love of the '60s. Much more problematic scratching this particular itch nowadays. (I've transcribed too many ER reports to ignore the creepy crawlies walking around out there. ) Alas, pickiness must be as much of a factor as my lack of daring.

[Deja Q]

17. No when you say "creepy crawlies", do you mean the diseases or the men they carry?

(Cool hobby BTW. Incidentally, entropy is my third most regularly practiced hobby...)

[buzzycrumbhunger]

21. Hm. Good question.

I suppose I mean whichever does not have a verifiable cure. Honestly, it took about a week in that job to realize I had no future as a ho'ma. The only thing that gave me a worse case of the willies (not the good kind) than the 13-year-olds with their 12th STDs were the old men who repeatedly lost household items up their arses. They should be using ERs everywhere for those Scared Straight programs.

[redqueen]

24. Do all nurses *have*

to do a rotation in the ER during ... whatever it is they call it when you're still in school but have to work for free as part of class? (I forget...)

[buzzycrumbhunger]

28. I would guess

Sadly, I'm even lower on the totem pole--I only transcribe what they say. Takes the equivalent of a third-year medical student's fund of knowledge and earns you the respect of a feces-flinging monkey--especially now that Indians are willing to do the job for a fourth the money. Fascinating work though--and no bedpans!

[SarahB]

36. No

thankfully

And

[trof]

2. OK, I promise not to ...you know. If you promise not to ...you know.

So we agree not to...you know.
Right?

[redqueen]

5. Cross my heart.

[trof]

7. And hope to die? Stick a needle in your eye?

OK.
Deal.

[Deja Q]

9. They used to make quality brazierres...

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

3. Not in my dreams, you ain't

so there.

[redqueen]

6. You have much better dreams than I do.

I need to start smoking and go on that patch thing.

[rcrush]

12. I have had celibacy forced on me by every woman alive.

[mcctatas]

13. shut up!

me too! for a little over 6 months now (and yet he was surprised when I told him i wanted a divorce )

[redqueen]

14. I've got ya beat

by 30 months!

[mcctatas]

16. Dear God woman...

only 6 months and I am about ready to violate the mailman (and he is not much to look at, I mean I suppose he is OK for a very round man of 60+)

[redqueen]

18. I am an expert

in the art of self-love.

[mcctatas]

19. I would be lost without my rabbit....

[redqueen]

20. I'm finally getting one of those things.

It's either that or risk severe carpal tunnel.

[flvegan]

23. God but I did love this exchange.

I'll be in my bunk.

[arcadian]

44. Seconded

I'm up for being violated by anyone who so wishes, by the way.

[WannaJumpMyScooter]

27. Hell, I am applying for the Postal Service

online.... right, fucking NOW

[NewJeffCT]

32. Breaking news - US Postal Service reports surge in applications

all wanting the same route.

[NewJeffCT]

31. I wonder if UPS or FedEx in your area

needs some temporary help for the holiday season?

[buzzycrumbhunger]

30. I am master of my domain. . .

30 months is nuthin', I promise you. Get back to me when you're ready to talk in terms of years. (I could add in almost my entire marriage, but that could make me suicidal.)

Oddly enough, knowing I have company does not make me feel less pathetic. It does, however, seem there might be a big enough population of deprived wimminz here to start up a battery cooperative so we could all get discount prices for quantity.

[redqueen]

37. Well... 36 months *is* three years, ya know...

and before that it was at least another 3 1/2.

But honestly? I'm in NO hurry.

[Lucian]

34. 42 months here.

[LeftyMom]

15. ...

Off to write another "sure, your industry's fucking imploding, but can't you eek out a few days of vacation?" PM.

[flvegan]

22. It's

because of the first that the second is the case.

[LeftyMom]

25. I know. But that's not getting me laid, so I choose not to care.

I'll be mature when I have blood flowing north of my navel again.

[redqueen]

26. ...

[Tuesday Afternoon]

29. no way I am fucking a Repuke. Looks like my fucking days are over.

fuck me I am so not ever going to get fucked again. I am of the un-fucked.

[NewJeffCT]

33. I am most nights, too

because my wife is away for work during the week most of the time.

[PVnRT]

35. This is the greatest thread of all time

[supernova]

38. I'll join your not fucking party

I've gone as many as 3 or 4 years between dates/potentials.

None of them have turned out to be people I'd want to spend more than two or three dates with anyway. And some didn't make it past a first date goodbye kiss. One guy seemed great, untill I heard his voice. I have a thing about really deep men's voices. Huge turn on. He didn't have it.

IOW, I've only found the People in the I Don't Want to Fuck Club. I have no idea where the Person I Do Want to Fuck is.



Oh well, I'm not in a big hurry either. Children aren't an option, too old now anyway, so I'm not desperate for any of those reasons.

Good thing I'm so good at solo activities.

[kentauros]

39. Just don't get on a plane, train or automobile anytime soon then...

Car Rental Agent: (cheerfully) Welcome to Marathon, may I help you?
Neal: Yes.
Car Rental Agent: How may I help you?
Neal: You can start by wiping that fucking dumb-ass smile off your rosey, fucking, cheeks! Then you can give me a fucking automobile: a fucking Datsun, a fucking Toyota, a fucking Mustang, a fucking Buick! Four fucking wheels and a seat!
Car Rental Agent: I really don't care for the way you're speaking to me.
Neal: And I really don't care for the way your company left me in the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking keys to a fucking car that isn't fucking there. And I really didn't care to fucking walk down a fucking highway and across a fucking runway to get back here to have you smile in my fucking face. I want a fucking car RIGHT FUCKING NOW!
Car Rental Agent: May I see your rental agreement?
Neal: I threw it away.
Car Rental Agent: Oh boy.
Neal: Oh boy, what?
Car Rental Agent: You're fucked!

[RadiationTherapy]

40. Damn. I think you would totally dig me...

and I have no way to prove it and I am married and everything; frustrato.

[harmonicon]

41. good for you

I, on the other hand, am so hopelessly fucking fucked.

[QueenOfCalifornia]

42. Locking

It's obvious you came here to start a non-sex thread. Please read the Lounge Rules.

[redqueen]

43. Heheh... nice one!

[derby378]

45. Is this a plea for a DU Dating Service?

Could be fun to watch. Or it could be one of those things we just can't tear our eyes away from, like a spectacular car wreck.

[IndianaJones]

46. now I get it. nt.