Vampire question...

[Lady Freedom]

If a self-proclaimed vampire moved in next door, what would be your reaction?

[RebelOne]

1. Get lots of crosses and garlic.

[Karl_Bonner_1982]

44. The latter is no problem for me tonight...

My farts would probably kill any vampire within a 10-kilometer radius.

[southpaw]

2. Laugh at his silly, juvenile ass.

Or hers, as the case may be.

On edit, I'd ask if he wants to join my D&D group for a big campaign that needs a super-powerful mage. Then, when he gets all excited, I'd say

Psych!

[Symarip]

3. If by 'vampire' you mean 'goth'

I'd play my jazz and soul records. Loud. Around midnight.

[Freedom Knight]

7. Speaking for myself, I would be right over with a bottle of cognac!

Hearing good music from a neighboring house at that time of night, My curiosity would get the best of me.

(edited for explanation)

[Symarip]

12. Badass

Say, howcome more goths aren't into Screamin' Jay Hawkins? He wore a cape and sang about vampire stuff. He was the original goth.

[Freedom Knight]

13. The older ones are. It is an age thing.

As one matures, we see thing differently. Many of the younger ones live the gothic lifestyle for shock value and grow out of it (the lifestyle). Others that grow with it and truly live it do start to enjoy the finer things of life.

As for vampires, it is not so much a lifestyle as just the way one is. A vampire can hate the "lifestyle" yet still be a vampire. A guy friend of mine put it the best way. Many guys he knew (and dated) love nascar, listed to country, and voted republican. However,they were still gay.

[trueblue2007]

18. WATCH OUT FOR THE OLD VAMPIRES!!!! They will slaughter you

[Freedom Knight]

22. That is insulting.

To vampires. Mccain could never be one of us. He would be more at home with Ghouls.

[elshiva]

28. Yes, vampires have standards.

[elshiva]

26. Are you in this picture? Which one is you?

[NJmaverick]

4. What ever you do don't invite them into your home

Ring the house with garlic, get your self a pocket cross and spend time in your back yard making wooden stakes.

[Freedom Knight]

5. That is an easy one.

Go over with a housewarming gift and an invitation to a gathering with like minds.

[Rabrrrrrr]

6. Is this hypothetical, in terms of a real vampire moving next door? Or a real-world scenario

of a stupid jackass who's moved in next door who says he's a vampire?

My reaction would be, probably, to just laugh in the shithead's face (assuming your situation is the latter one, and not the hypothetical situation).

[mcctatas]

8. Depends...

is he hot?

[RevolutionaryActs]

27. Dude, I was going to say that.

bwhahaha! :rofl:

[mcctatas]

34. DMTA...

;)

[RevolutionaryActs]

36. HEY! I resemble that remark.

:P



But honestly if he's all hot and broody like Bill on True Blood, it will greatly change how I go about things. :P

[mcctatas]

37. OMG, Bill!

[undeterred]

9. I would assume that his or her parents were dealing with it.

Now if that person was an adult, then I would be keeping my distance.

[Freedom Knight]

14. A wise decision.

If a person is uncomfortable around another, they should stay away. And don't be afraid to let them know. If they know this, they would want to keep their distance as well because it would just be awkwardfor both of them.

[Lady Freedom]

16. I have to agree with that.

As Robert Frost wrote:"Good fences make good neighbors."

[NewJeffCT]

10. Is it a male or female vampire?

female vampires are usually pretty hawt.

but, in reality, I'd probably roll my eyes and not really care otherwise.

[SoxFan]

23. Why is that, anyway?

How come female vampires always look like Salma Hayek or Catherine Deneuve?

[Recovered Repug]

41. Really good casting director?

[Recovered Repug]

42. Really good casting director?

[LeftinOH]

11. Present him/her with a list of suggested victims.....n/t

[crispini]

15. Best answer in the thread! nt

[undeterred]

17. I had a neighbor who told me she was a practicing witch.

That was years ago and I still keep my shades drawn on that side of the house. She has a child now and I doubt she even remembers saying it.

[Rhythm]

30. Providing she was serious, why would that be a problem?

Just because her spiritual path isn't the same as yours?

Personally, I've known good and bad folks of all paths, including witches.

[SmokingJacket]

19. I'd show him my marvelous garlic patch. nt

[billyoc]

20. I live in a 50 story high rise. Half of Transylvania could live here, I'd never know.

:shrug:

[Freedom Knight]

21. Maybe not Transylvania, but you my have a few members of the Court of Lazarus there.

From what I hear, New York is their hometown.

[DarkTirade]

24. Depends

Is said vampire attractive? :P

[elshiva]

25. I'd invite him or her in.

:loveya:

[tismyself]

29. you're serious?!

You mean to say that someone moved in next door and announced "I'm a vampire"?! Really?! Geezus, after I scraped my jaw up off the floor I probably would have had a heart attack laughing hysterically. A response like "my dear, you appear to have a pubic hair stuck in your teeth" would have been appropriate. I guess we all have our issues though.

[harmonicon]

31. well, I would laugh, but I'd try not to laugh directly at them

... that would just be rude... I probably couldn't help it, and maybe it would be more sad if/when they noticed that I started laughing anytime that I saw them and they were immediately out of view (I don't think I could hold it in long).

[mainegreen]

32. I'd tell him to go suck himself, of course.

[Nevernose]

33. I've seen weirder shit. I'm in touch w/ my inner redneck

Probably take a deep breath, exhaling slowly, shrug my shoulders, and go about my day (or, more likely in this case, my night).

See, I'm in touch with my inner redneck. Not the kind of redneck that looks for pristine wilderness to drive their ATVs through or street signs and stray cats to pepper with shotgun pellets, mind you, but the kind of inner redneck that stretches back generations. The kind of redneck whose sharecropping ancestors' had not only their but their spirits broken but their descendants' spirits broken until the seventh generation.

The kind of redneck who look at the Hearse in the driveway and thinks "They sure don't build 'em like that anymore," and who witnesses the mysterious disappearances and/or deaths of a string of high-priced call girls and thinks "At least they're quiet over there -- not like those last assholes -- but his yard sure does need some work."

[PittPoliSci]

35. probably just chill.

they're introverted people usually. i'd probably go over with a bottle of red wine and say hello.

[Iggo]

38. I'd laugh about it later...

...with people he'd never meet.

C'mon. It's your next-door neighbor. Be cool, man.

[shugah]

39. i would self-proclaim that i am not a vampire

self-proclaiming! it's all the rage. c'mon people, get with it!

[lady raven]

40. "Get the HELL out of here, McCain!"

[LeftyMom]

43. We're not allowed to post about that subject on DU.

Vampires= sexy.

[GoddessOfGuinness]

45. I'd wonder why Cheney would want to live in this neighborhood.

[coyotespaw]

46. Remind him that in a one-on-one fight...

werewolves whoop vampires all the time, then offhandedly ask him when the next full moon is.

[elshiva]

47. RuR Roooooooo!

[coyotespaw]

49. Not sure what the dude from Greg The Bunny has to do with this thread...

:shrug:

[elshiva]

50. He's Oz the Werewolf from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

[coyotespaw]

52. I've seen that movie dozens of times, and I didn't see him in it.

[panhead1961]

48. Does this mean Santa Claus is real too??

[elshiva]

51. Willow: "Vampires are real?"

[dropkickpa]

53. Howdy neighbor

Do you have a dog who'd like to play with mine?