Leave it to my 9 year old nephew and 6 year old neice to teach me the secret of happiness

[NJmaverick]

I have to say that I shocked myself with this one. The two of them are different as night and day. My nephew is never happy and is often angry. He is never satisfied with what he has, rather he is always thinking about what he doesn't have. A perfect example was self guided tour on a naval ship. He never would enjoy a particular part of the tour, rather he was alway pushing to see the next one (as if that one would be infinately better). When things don't go his way he obsesses over it. He refuses to ever let go and move on. He makes himself miserable over the littlest things.
My neice on the other hand, is happy go lucky. She doesn't let set backs bother her, rather she shrugs and moves on with plan B. She lives in the momement and enjoys what she has. She doesn't seem to care about what she doesn't have.
This is what I observed about the two. They have been this way for a few years now. Suddenly I started to realize that these two completely different approaches to life often shaped my own states of happiness. I started to realize that there was more of my nephew in me, than I realized (or wanted). I started to realize that if I could adopt the approach of my neice and eliminate the thinking of my nephew, I could be much happier than I usually am. Now I find myself taking a step back, now and then, and looking at my attitude toward different issues and life in general. I am now asking myself and I taking my nephew's or neice's approach to life. This may seem silly and inconsequential, but I find that the two living examples having really helped me to clarify my own way of looking at the world.
Never in a million years would I have dreamed I would come to a profound self realization by being with my young nephew and niece

Have anyone else ever had a similar experience?

[MissMillie]

1. well, I notice I am most unhappy

when I'm thinking about what I don't have.

I've also learned that when I reach one goal, another always replaces it... so the destination is never the real joy... it's the journey.

:hi:

[lizziegrace]

2. Happened to me two weeks ago

I was going stir-crazy here and decided at the last minute to take a road trip. I stayed with a friend who has beaten cancer and she lives in the present. She has every reason to be sad and angry but chooses to be happy about what she has. Cancer damaged her body and divorce changed her life as she knew it, but she's content. I realized that even though I'd driven down to see another friend's band play that I was really there to learn and turn my mind around. I'm now grateful. Every single day. And life is turning around for me.

:hug:

[NJmaverick]

3. I am very glad to hear things are working out for you

:hi:

[panhead1961]

4. I realized the same thing when observing my dog

Whenever you want to or need to just lay down and nap. The poop eating thing I'll skip

[Arugula Latte]

5. Years ago, I read an article about a boy

He had some immune system disease, and he had to be kept in a sterile environment, shielded from all sorts of germs and bacteria. The article had one line that always stuck with me: "He has but one wish -- to walk on grass." I have a tendency to start thinking negatively (sometimes I think I might have a low-level anxiety disorder), and sometimes I try to pull myself out of it by thinking about all the things I have that I shouldn't take for granted. For that boy, walking on grass would have been a life fulfilled. It alsways makes me realize I actually am very lucky.

[NJmaverick]

7. I used to do a similar thing with only with Christopher Reeves

thinking how the very act of walking across a room...

[PassingFair]

6. Your nephew will be more "successful" in life.

Unless your niece gets lucky.

Of course, she won't see it that way,
but society will.

People who are "driven" to move forward
and discontent with the status quo
"achieve" more.

[Midlodemocrat]

8. Oh, I thought you were going to say that they forced you to

take them to see the Jonas Brothers in concert.


:hide:

[NJmaverick]

10. Fortunately no (you have my sympathies) usually their "forcing"

is a phone call on a quiet weekend day (usually when I am set to relax with a good book) and they call me up because they want me to visit them.

[Midlodemocrat]

11. I think that is so sweet.

I love my nieces and nephews. With my mom gone, I get to be the one to spoil them rotten. I love it.

[NJmaverick]

13. It is and I always say yes

I appreciate that it wont be long before they are teenagers and spending time with their uncle will be the last thing they want to do.

[Midlodemocrat]

12. Dupe.

[JVS]

9. But can one choose their own outlook.

Can one change their nature?

What if Marc Weiner is right?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A7l1K4A_q54

[NJmaverick]

14. I believe we can

I believe the knowledge and understanding brings power. Power enough to change our very nature.

Although interestingly enough, the two of them have been this way from nearly the time they were born. So there does seem to be a certain inherent nature involved. I just believe we have the ability to over come it.