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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 03:47 PM
Original message
my therapist told me to quit DU
also.....as I was in the hospital for a few weeks.....I missed two DBT groups, I then missed one because my masshealth ride never showed......out of my control......missed last week, because I went on vaca ( which sucked) but I had told her about that absence months ago.....I am now on probation, must do extra work and write an apology to the DBT group for my absensee.......If I don't they won't treat me at all.....I was told when I joined DBT I could quit at anytime......when I tried to quit they told me they would not treat me at all if I didn't partake...... :wtf:
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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 03:49 PM
Response to Original message
1. Get a new therapist
what a quack! saying you should quit DU, did he give a reason?
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. she said you weren't "real"
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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:06 PM
Response to Reply #2
6. funny last time I checked, I am pretty sure I was real
Message boards are a wonderful medium where you can converse with like minded individuals. In real life you are pretty much limited to those in a certain geographic region that you meet by chance. While with DU you get to pick and choose the people you converse with. Maybe you ought to tell her the internets is more than just a series of tubes. In fact many real life friendships and even marriages have resulted from people interacting on DU.

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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:08 PM
Response to Reply #6
7. I completely agree
I met one of my fiances on DU.....and some of my best friends......she just doesn't get it.....
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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:15 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. "I met one of my fiances on DU"
How many guys are you planning on marrying?
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:34 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:35 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. That certainly sounds like a very odd story
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CreekDog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:09 PM
Response to Reply #2
8. me and my 18 sockpuppets are real!
:rant:
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:10 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. lol
proove it.....show me a pic!

here is me

and meghan.....my bff and sis
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:17 PM
Response to Reply #2
37. My conservative hubby also says DU is not "rea.l" What does that say about your therapist?
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Connonym Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:29 PM
Response to Reply #2
41. At the risk of sounding like a therapist, how do you feel about that?
I guess if DU causes you a lot of stress or otherwise impedes with your life maybe your therapist has a point. But she's wrong that we're not real. I'm not a poster child for impeccable mental health but I think DU actually makes me healthier and happier because it reaffirms that there are other people who share my values.

If DU really is bad for you then maybe you should leave because your well being is the most important thing but I certainly hope that we're not bad for you and that we can provide a special ray of sunshine in your life the same way you contribute to that ray of sunshine for so many of us.
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #1
3. I am in the process of looking for one
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meow2u3 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:01 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Your so-called therapist must be a freeper
That's why (s)he told you to quit DU.
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:02 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. lol
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:09 PM
Response to Reply #1
25. Quack is a bit strong, I'd say
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Blue-Jay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:27 PM
Response to Original message
11. I can think of a few DUers who need to start seeing your therapist.
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:34 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. please expand
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:13 PM
Response to Reply #13
46. I think it has to do with your therapist recommending that people quit DU. nt
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:46 PM
Response to Reply #11
16. LOL! Me too! I got a list!! nt
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terrya Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:11 PM
Response to Reply #11
26. Yeah.
As someone who has been through therapy myself, it can be very helpful to sort out various issues in your life. Some DU'ers could benefit from therapy themselves.
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RoyGBiv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:34 PM
Response to Original message
14. Oh, mine said that too ...

Said that DU makes me too angry.

Therapists aren't all-knowing.

I explained that *DU* does not making me angry. Stupid people make me angry, and I refuse to sit here in my chair in my apartment and ignore that stupid people are running this country.

"You should work on yourself a little more."

What does that even mean?

Screw the therapist (not literally).

I get "pissed" a lot when I'm reading DU, and I get into it with people who pull my triggers, but they are real people with real concerns, and they represent the real world. If it weren't for DU, I'd either be willfully ignorant or just pent up with an ill-defined rage and no outlet.

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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:51 PM
Response to Reply #14
17. hmmm
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RoyGBiv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:54 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. A Giants forum?

Nah ...

Well, maybe something similar. :)

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NJmaverick Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:04 PM
Response to Reply #18
23. damn it, I was trying post a cartoon
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RoyGBiv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:13 PM
Response to Reply #23
27. Ah, yes!

THIS is my problem. :)

Friend sent that to me awhile back. I'm guessing he must be right. ;-)

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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:56 PM
Response to Reply #14
20. When the net is supportive, it gets creativity points.
When it's not, it becomes unreal. :crazy:
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 04:55 PM
Response to Original message
19. I'd put that therapist on probation for using punishment
Edited on Sat Aug-23-08 04:55 PM by sfexpat2000
where communication would work.

But, I'm not qualified to give medical advice. :evilgrin:
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:01 PM
Response to Original message
21. Years ago, I had a therp who encouraged me to read and post on
the newsgroup alt.support.depression. In time, I came to think that that particular group wasn't healthy for me (when a person miscarried and blamed it on an argument between her, me, and another poster). Not long after that, I quit my therapist. I came to think of him as nothing more than a glorified phone psychic. Every time my depression lifted, he'd find some new "issue" to "confront" which would send me back into a funk. I began to see a pattern.

Just don't get caught up into thinking your therp is omniscient. Some of 'em are crazier than any client to ever darken their door. Not all of 'em, but caveat emptor.
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Schema Thing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:03 PM
Response to Original message
22. Internet discussion boards can be VERY unhealthy places for some people
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:09 PM
Response to Reply #22
24. And very healthy for others. Just like therapy. nt
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Schema Thing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:33 PM
Response to Reply #24
28. I think compared to therapy, a db has very limited therapeutic potential
Not zero therapeutic potential, but limited.


OTOH, a db's ability to harm a person who is using them to subconsciously reinforce or avoid confronting harmful thoughts and habits is almost unlimited. I have no idea if the OP does that or not, so my comments are generic.
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:43 PM
Response to Reply #28
29. I know therapists with very limited therapeutic potential.
Edited on Sat Aug-23-08 05:46 PM by mycritters2
Hell, I know a therapist or two with zero therapeutic potential. And don't kid yourself--therapy can be a great way to subconsciously reinforce or avoid confronting harmful thoughts and habits. I know therapists I wouldn't refer my coffee table to.
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:03 PM
Response to Reply #29
33. I was once told by a therapist that I needed to "put my trust in Jesus"
Batshit crazy. I agree. There are good therapists and there are people who don't deserve the title.

And for what it's worth, one of the things that helped me through one of the worse periods of my life was a message board for depressives called Walkers in Darkness.
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:09 PM
Response to Reply #33
34. And my therp tried to get me to join the UUA. Among other things.
I think Walkers in Darkness may have been started by someone who left asd. Is it a yahoo group? I think I know the guy who started it.
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:10 PM
Response to Reply #34
35. Interesting
I honestly don't remember - it was back in the mid-90's.

What's the UUA? :dunce:
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:19 PM
Response to Reply #35
38. Unitarian Universalist Association. He assumed my church was fundie.
I had to educate him about progressive Christianity.
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:45 PM
Response to Original message
30. May I ask what a "DBT" group is? (I don't get out much., so there's a lot I don't know.)
Redstone
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Rising Phoenix Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:50 PM
Response to Reply #30
31. its Dialectal Behavior Therapy
most often used for Borderline Personality Disorder
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #31
39. while i would hate to see you go i think in the case of this DX you should listen to the therapist
Edited on Sat Aug-23-08 06:26 PM by pitohui
you seem to be getting advice from folks who suffer from post traumatic stress syndrome and clinical depression, another universe away from borderline personality disorder

it may be VERY important for you to learn to "humor" people who don't know as much as you do, say your therapist :-) that's what you're paying her for

don't close the account, just follow the advice for awhile and see how it goes would be my suggestion

DU will still be here if you find out that she's wrong

i think it's more important to do whatever you can to seek mental health, you should put participating in an online forum as way secondary to that

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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:10 PM
Response to Reply #39
44. PTSd is not "another universe from bpd". Bpd is a form of PTSD. nt
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #31
42. Self delete (repost below).
Edited on Sat Aug-23-08 06:38 PM by BlueIris
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 05:58 PM
Response to Original message
32. Isn't dbt supposed to be time-limited? Most cognitive therapies aren't
Edited on Sat Aug-23-08 05:59 PM by mycritters2
supposed to go on forever like psychoanalysis. This sounds like they want to keep treating you in a more open-ended way than I thought dbt was supposed to. Maybe I'm mistaken, but that was my understanding. And they're unhappy about two sessions you missed because you were hospitalized?!!

I'll see your :wtf: and raise you a
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pitohui Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:29 PM
Response to Reply #32
40. borderline personality disorder is very resistant to treatment, methinks
i know nothing abt this particular therapy but i was close to someone w. this DX and it is very very challenging

i would at least give the therapist's advice a try before just giving up and saying "to heck w. it she's an idiot who doesn't know what she's doing" -- my belief is that almost anyone w/ this DX at some pt would come to the same conclusion abt almost any therapist no matter how good

my two cents and maybe only worth what you paid for it!
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:12 PM
Response to Reply #40
45. Dbt is a very carefully laid out program, with tasks and worksheets and a schedule.
It is not open-ended. I've had two parishioners over the years go through dbt. It is geared specifically for people with bpd, and is a very disciplined, clear program.
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dropkickpa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
36. When I was being treated for PTSD
The therapist I had to see (in order for the ins company to okay psych med rx) was CONVINCED I lived my life through thrill seeking and that was my problem. Completely ignoring the fact that I was a manager of a fucking video store (Hollywood) and got robbed at gunpoint 3 times. I sought out the excitement of working there at night not because I went to school during the day, but because I liked the thrill of it. :eyes:

She was a patchouli stinkin' airhead with NO clue about what she was talking about. :dunce:
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BlueIris Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 06:38 PM
Response to Original message
43. Your therapist sounds like an abusive asshole. However, s/he might be onto something re: DU.
I've basically quit posting here in the last couple of weeks, and so far it's had a positive effect on my health.

But I'd try to make arrangements to get a mental healthcare provider who understands the concept of civilized human behavior.
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otherlander Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:31 PM
Response to Original message
47. My therapist told me not to sleep in train stations.
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The empressof all Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:35 PM
Response to Original message
48. You're lucky you're in a DBT program. Waiting lists are long in my state.
You were probably told when you entered into DBT that the process is rigorous, challenging and has rules about missing groups. All of the current research indicates that this form of therapy is quite affective in treatment of the individuals who have the symptoms that have lead to the diagnosis of BPD. You also already know that many with this diagnosis are highly resistant and oppositional to treatment especially when it gets tough. Ultimately it's your choice but you'll never really know if what you can learn through putting the work into your DBT will make your life more manageable unless you follow your treatment plan.

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greatauntoftriplets Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-23-08 07:43 PM
Response to Original message
49. Locking,
Democratic Underground is not the right place to ask for medical advice. Members are not qualified to help you. But we wish you well.

greatauntoftriplets
DU moderator
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