Well, I'm not going back to college after all.

[trof]

A few days ago I read a story in a local paper about Joe Namath (big '60s and '70s college and pro football star quarterback for you youngsters).

He left the University of Alabama in 1965 to play for the New York Jets, a few hours shy of his degree.

When his daughter told someone she would be the first in her family to get a college degree, ol' Broadway Joe felt his competitive hackles rise.
So he applied for readmission in an off-campus, online program.

He completed the required courses and in January will return to Tuscaloosa to receive his degree.

Well hell, I thought. Why not?
I left in '65.
I'd need about 30 semester hours for my BA in journalism.
A couple of semester's work. It might be fun. Surely it would be interesting.

So I applied for readmission.
No problem, the admissions office said.
And then I looked up tuition costs on their website.
Holy Shite!
$250 per semester hour?
$750 for a 3 hour class?
That's about half of my monthly social security check.
$3,750 for a 'normal' semester class load of 15 hours?
whew
I don't guess so.

I didn't see anything about 'senior citizen' tuition.
I had thought it would be nominal, or even FREE?
It ain't like they'll be swamped by geezers wanting to finish their degree decades after they left the university.

Anyway, it was fun to think about for a few days.
I'll have to remain a 'college dropout'.

[matcom]

1. you could go to THIS school!

affordable and practical!

Trof's New Career

[trof]

2. I am really afraid to click on this.

Let me fix another drink and work my courage up.

[trof]

8. I don't think I can do that.

OK, 3rd scotch gave me the cajones to click.
My athletic prowess ain't quite what it used to be.
Looks like a lot of fun, though.
I bet the tips are good.

[matcom]

9. you needed COURAGE to click on MY link?

stop it. you are going to give me a reputation around here

[trof]

11. Oh my friend. You had the rep LONG before I got here.

Merry Christmas.

[CreekDog]

19. RickRolling is not a school!

[sasquatch]

22. I hear you've been working OT to get TM in there

[ThomCat]

3. It truly SUCKS that state schools are cheap or free anymore.

They were created with the purpose of being affordable and available to even the poorest people who want to go to college. But republicans have chipped away at that year after year, demanding that the schools pay for themselves with less or no state funding.

[trof]

6. You won't believe this. Our STATE constituion says

that the state is not REQUIRED to provide free education to anyone.
Regardless of age or grade level.
They do, of course (more-or-less), for 1 through 12. And kindergarten in some cities.

But the constitution says the state is not 'required' to do it.
They just do, 'out of the goodness of their hearts'.


We SO need a new constitution.

[Frosty1]

4. Try checking with

your state vocational rehabilitation people. Sometimes they have funding for college costs. Also check out Social Security ticket to work program. It's possible these programs have been gutted buy this admin but it's worth a try.

[trof]

14. I'm just one of those libruls who wants a free ride.

I'm kidding.
It just seemed like such a repuglican thing to say.

[judaspriestess]

5. I'm sorry

that sucks. how about applying for a grant?

[trof]

10. I'm probably too 'rich'.

Probably TMI, but between my small pension and our S/S checks we 'almost' cover our monthly living expenses.
Almost, but not quite.
I have a 'fairly' sizable IRA (OK, around $300,000) that we draw from to make up the difference.

We try to live off of the income that those investments generate.
So far, we're staying about even.
But if we start drawing that down...well, when it's gone, it's gone.
I'm 66 and Miz t. is 63, so we could conceivably be around for another 20 years or so.

And of course the more you take out, the less that's left to generate income.
It's a vicious circle.
Retirement/old age ain't for sissies.

[ileus]

7. 300 bucks a semester hour....Kill me now.

we're going to have to move when the wife completes her degree to find a higher paying job to pay back the loans.

[Rabrrrrrr]

12. Sad news is - that's a pretty cheap college.

Hard to find one for that little amount of money any more.

[trof]

13. Yeah, it's comparatively 'cheap'. Anybody remember 'the GI Bill'?

Many economists have said that the GI Bill, which gave free college educations to returning WWII vets, (even PAID them to attend college) brought on the decades of economic growth we enjoyed ever since.

You got to prime the pump.

[DS1]

15. Used it

even with other financial help, money was scarce while attending 4-class semesters. Even with a job seemingly at all times.

[trof]

16. Thank you for the good years.

They were all because of you and your kind.

[ellisonz]

17. It's good to be young.

[trof]

18. Yes it is.

I remember being bulletproof and a few other things.
I think that was Stage 4.

Stage 1 - SMART

This is when you suddenly become an expert on every subject in the known universe. You know you know everything and want to pass on your knowledge to anyone who will listen. At this stage you are always RIGHT. And of course the person you are talking to is very WRONG. This makes for and interesting argument when both parties are SMART.

Stage 2 - GOOD LOOKING

This is when you realize that you are the BEST LOOKING person in the entire bar and that people fancy you. You can go up to a perfect stranger knowing they fancy you and they really want to talk to you. Bear in mind that you are still SMART, so you can talk to this person about any subject under the sun.

Stage 3 - RICH

This is when you suddenly become the richest person in the world. You can buy drinks for the entire bar because you have an armored truck full of money parked behind the bar. You can also make bets at this stage, because of course, you are still SMART, so naturally you win all your bets. It doesn't matter how much you bet cos' you are RICH. You will also buy drinks for everyone that you fancy, because now you are the BEST LOOKING person in the world.

Stage 4 - BULLET PROOF

You are now ready to pick fights with anyone and everyone especially those with whom you have been betting or arguing. This is because nothing can hurt you. At this point you can also go up to the partners of the people who you fancy and challenge them to a battle of wits or money. You have no fear of losing this battle because you are SMART, you are RICH and hell, you're BETTER LOOKING than they are anyway!

Stage 5 - INVISIBLE

This is the Final Stage of Drunkenness. At this point you can do anything because NO ONE CAN SEE YOU. You dance on a table to impress the people who you fancy because the rest of the people in the room cannot see you. You are invisible to the person who wants to fight you. You can walk through the street singing at the top of your lungs because no one can see or hear you and because you're still SMART and you know all the words.

[Bossy Monkey]

20. Trof, call the registrar's office and ask about reduced (or preferably free) tuition

for returning senior students. GF has been working at USC for the last few years and says most state colleges offer this; however, they don't advertise it. Anyway, can't hurt to ask.
Edit: There's a bunch of scholarships here: http://www.ua.edu/catalogs/undergraduate/16400.html (bottom of the page)

[JVS]

21. Trof. I think you should be able to get a better deal with that. My mom has signed up for some...

classes at my Alma Mater for much less than regular students pay.

[Capn Sunshine]

23. Have you tried student loans?

That's what they want you to do-that's why costs have soared. Everybody get debt. It's not so bad- you have two years before you have to pay it back. I'm sure someone here could explain their own experience with it as I'm only looking at it on paper.

[leeroysphitz]

24. So you're never going back to your old school? NT