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If your spouse's friend hits on you, what is the best strategy?

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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:07 PM
Original message
Poll question: If your spouse's friend hits on you, what is the best strategy?

Sorry, polls are turned off at Level 3.

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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:09 PM
Response to Original message
1. I would definitely tell my spouse.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:11 PM
Original message
And, what if your spouse doesn't believe it?
Any ideas?
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:13 PM
Response to Original message
7. Are you speaking from a perspective of someone who knows someone
that that happened to? Because my spouse would believe me.

It never occurred to me that he wouldn't, actually, but now you've given me something to think about.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #7
10. Well, yes
Let's say, a friend of mine. And her spouse is sort of in denial about obvious overtures... long, inappropriate hugs, excessive flattery, etc.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #10
12. Yikes. I guess I would then mention something directly to the friend
that his behavior was making me uncomfortable. And, if this friend is married, I might also indicate that I would tell his wife.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:16 PM
Response to Reply #12
13. Oh yeah
Thanks! :hug:
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:09 PM
Response to Original message
2. Assuming you're not interested
just politely and firmly tell them "no"

unless it's a female friend of your spouse, of course!
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:12 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. Oh, this is strictly hypothetical of course
Thanks! :hi:
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NewJeffCT Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:14 PM
Original message
You're welcome...
If it happened one time, I'd write it off as temporary insanity.

If he persists, however, then you'd definitely have to bring it up with hubby.
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Tian Zhuangzhuang Donating Member (422 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:10 PM
Response to Original message
3. Is she/he hot?
I mean it really depends on your favorite outcome.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #3
6. No
Assuming we were talking actual events... no (not after getting to know their personality, anyway).
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Tian Zhuangzhuang Donating Member (422 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #6
9. Well then tell your spouse.
It might turn out your spouse was behind it.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #9
15. Now *that * is a conspiracy theory!
:tinfoilhat:
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Tian Zhuangzhuang Donating Member (422 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:28 PM
Response to Reply #15
18. No that is actual experience.
Once because she was jealous of her friend and thought I was going to cheat on her.


Once cause she was bi-curious and wanted to have a threesome.


the second time turned out better.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:43 PM
Response to Reply #18
24. Wow
And, you had no idea in advance?
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Tian Zhuangzhuang Donating Member (422 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:54 PM
Response to Reply #24
31. The first one definitely not.
Fortunately I was too clueless to catch on.

The second one there was some giggling and some smoke and the three of us were in a house in the woods alone so I kinda got the hint.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:11 PM
Response to Original message
4. Suggest a 3 way?
:shrug:






















































:hide:

I kid, honest. I'd tell my spouse if it was very clear to me that I was being hit on.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #4
8. lol!
Should have seen that coming. Thanks. :-)
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:16 PM
Response to Original message
11. Tell my spouse
that is something that shouldn't stand between partners because I would feel really bad in the company of the so-called "friend". The spouse should know that his "friend" is hitting on me.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:18 PM
Response to Reply #11
14. Guys seem to be somewhat unsure, sometimes...
..about flattery vs. more. At least, from what I've observed.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:22 PM
Response to Reply #14
16. There is a different between compliments
and hitting on one. BIG different. And the second one is just creepy.
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:27 PM
Response to Original message
17. Trout slap, definitely.
I am attempting to recommend a trout slap three times today.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:30 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. Dare I ask
What is a trout slap?
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Fire Walk With Me Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:33 PM
Response to Reply #19
20. Grasp a fresh trout by the tail, and smack the offending party across the face with it.
Should send a clear message. I have not yet attempted this, but dream of the day when I will.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:41 PM
Response to Reply #20
22. Knowing my luck, it would slip out of my hand...
..and hit the wrong person. Then they would sue me! lol!

But, thanks for the tip! :D
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judaspriestess Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:34 PM
Response to Original message
21. tell that person to back off
and if it happens again, its going to get ugly real quick.
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:42 PM
Response to Reply #21
23. Seems like a strategy
If the person wasn't a foot and 3 inches and 40 lbs heavier! lol
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:44 PM
Response to Original message
25. I'm fond of the phrase "stop it or I'll beat your ass" in that situation.
:evilgrin:
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:46 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. That doesn't work with everyone...
..if you know what I mean (?).

:evilgrin:
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:47 PM
Response to Reply #26
27. That's where plan B comes in
Plan B is "stop it or he'll beat your ass."
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:48 PM
Response to Reply #27
28. *sigh*
If it was only so simple.

Thanks! :hi:
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:50 PM
Response to Reply #28
29. You can borrow him if you want.
:D
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Haole Girl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Sep-28-07 03:52 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. Thanks!
;-)

Well, I better go get ready for the hypothetical dinner party.

I voted for getting really drunk, of course (being the coward that I am!).

:hi:
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