|
Edited on Tue Mar-20-07 01:34 PM by huskerlaw
The parental units have returned to Nebraska from their winter journey to Arizona. So yesterday, since it was nice and "warm" (read: in the 40s), Mom went for a walk with one of her friends.
Walk went fine, she said goodbye to the friend and started walking home. Now, my parents live next to a highway. A fairly major one, inasmuch as there could be a major highway though a town of 500 people. Anyway, it was busy enough that we were forbidden anywhere near it as children.
Right, so she's walking home alongside the highway, which, of course, does not have sidewalks. She hears a car coming, so she steps off onto the shoulder, which is unpaved...just dirt and rocks. No biggie. The car goes by, she's about to step back onto the side of the highway when her foot gets caught on a piece of wire.
My mother proceeds to do a face plant into the dirt. And, of course, what does one do when they're falling? Well, they put their hands out to stop the fall, right? Yup. Next thing she knows, she's lying on her back, beside the road. As she's laying there, kind of taking inventory of herself, a car goes by. Obviously there's a woman laying on the side of the road. In a small town. Whatever, guy doesn't stop.
By now Mom has realized that she's not entirely injury-free. She's a nurse, so she knows not to move until she's positive that nothing is injured, so she's still kinda laying there, trying to figure out exactly where the pain is coming from. She's thinking shoulder, but that's pretty close to the neck...and, well, you see the problem. So she's hoping that someone will stop.
The next car that comes by does stop. And the occupant of said car turns out to be a paramedic. Seriously, the chances of that happening in a town that small? Nearly zero. Especially in the middle of the morning. As he's checking her out to make sure that her neck is ok, another car happens by. This time, it's the father of my best friend from elementary school. He obviously knows my mom, so he stops. Funny thing is, he's also a fireman. Really? Two trained EMT's? Woman should buy a lottery ticket.
The two of them figure out that her back and neck are fine, but her arm is hanging at a funny angle. So they're trying to help her sit up. And another car pulls over. With YET ANOTHER paramedic inside. At this point it's almost getting humorous. So the four of them, all medically trained, decide that it's best to call an ambulance. Mom sends the fireman (aka former friend's dad) into our house (which is about 100 feet away) to call my stepdad.
At this point in the story, we shall leave my mother...who got to the hospital just fine...and focus on Bill, the stepdad.
He's at work near Omaha. It's his first day back at work since returning from 3 months in Arizona. Now, Bill works at an Air Force base. He's a civilian contractor, and he works with nuclear weapons. Well, his day was already kinda shitty because upon arrival at work, he realized that his swipy card wouldn't work. No swipy card? No admittance. He manages to call his boss or something and gets inside the building, where he immediately has to go to the Swipy Card Reauthorization Office (or something like that).
So when the call comes regarding the accident, he's not in his office. His secretary takes a message and sets off to find him. Somehow she didn't know that he was at the Swipy Card Reauthorization Office (SCRO), so after trying to find him for a few minutes, she decides to send out an all-building 911 page.
Now, 911 pages aren't exactly standard operating procedure. Especially in a building full of people who work with nuclear weapons. You just don't joke about emergencies in an environment like that. So Bill kinda freaks out a bit, thinking it's something work-related. But he doesn't have his new swipy card yet, so he's a bit screwed...if it's a work related emergency, ain't nothin' he can do, cuz he doesn't have clearance without the swipy card.
Right, so he's a bit panicked. He calls up to his secretary...who informs him that no, it's not work related...your wife was in an accident. And somehow, I have no idea how, but apparently these people didn't play the game "telephone" when they were kids...anyway, somehow my mom's trip-and-fall accident has morphed into something sounding like a really, really nasty car accident.
So, again, poor guy kinda freaks out. He runs out of the SCRO, jumps in his car, and tries to head to the hospital. Except. He needs a swipy card to get OUT as well. So he's sitting at a gate, which is guarded by 3 or 4 very armed, very unsympathetic soldiers. He realizes he hasn't gotten the new card from the SCRO, so he decides the only thing to do is back up and go back to get it.
He's apparently paying zero attention to what's behind him, however. Because he backs up straight into a concrete barricade. Effectively totaling the back bumper on his Toyota.
Somehow he manages to get a swipy card and get to the hospital.
Where he finds my mother, looking perfectly fine, sitting on a bed, chatting and laughing with a nurse.
I think he nearly strangled her.
Turns out, mom has a very broken right arm. The big bone under her bicep snapped in half, up near her shoulder. So now my poor mom has her right arm in a thing she called a "demobilizer". Basically a sling that holds her arm directly down by her side, bent at the elbow so that her right hand is pinned to her stomach.
She'll be wearing that for about 6 weeks. Assuming she doesn't need surgery...which she will find out tomorrow.
:crazy:
ETA: it happened yesterday, not today... ;)
|
Printer-friendly format
Email this thread to a friend
Bookmark this thread
(1000+ posts)
Send PM |
Profile |
Ignore
