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My grandfather just died - and I feel weird

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Coventina Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 09:56 AM
Original message
My grandfather just died - and I feel weird
He was in his 90s - so it's not like it was a surprise or anything.

My memories of him going back to my early childhood is that he was always polite and withdrawn. He seemed kindly enough, just not really "warm."

As I got older, I found out a lot more about him as a younger man. And he was kind of a bastard.

So, I'm sitting here crying, but I don't really know why. He had a pretty good life, maybe better and longer than he deserved. He wasn't a horrible person, but could have been a lot nicer. So why do I feel a sense of loss?
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BarenakedLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
1. I'm so sorry for your loss
:hug:

It is natural to feel the loss.
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tigereye Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:05 AM
Response to Original message
2. hey
losing people is hard, no matter how they acted.

:hug:
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
3. I'm sorry
:hug:
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Fleshdancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
4. My condolences.....
I think you probably feel a sense of loss because, although he was not perfect, he was your grandfather and despite his imperfections, you loved him in your own way. What would be really confusing for you is if someone you knew died and you didn't feel anything.

I am sorry for your loss. :hug:
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buddhamama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:10 AM
Response to Original message
5. I am sorry for your loss
Edited on Fri Dec-15-06 10:10 AM by buddhamama
:hug:
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johnnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:12 AM
Response to Original message
6. I'm sorry to hear about this
The thing is, there is no official way to feel when someone passes. Both my grandparent's that died were in their 90s and the whole family was more in celebration mode for their funerals than mourning. They had great lives and we knew that they would pass on.

But, don't try to think about how you *should* feel too much. Just let your emotions take you where they take you. Like I said.. there are no rules for this kind of thing.

Take care.
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:21 AM
Response to Original message
7. because he's your grandfather
you didn't know him as a bastard, you knew him as your grandpa.

It's a loss.

And I'm sorry.

:hug:
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bigwillq Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Dec-15-06 10:24 AM
Response to Original message
8. I am very sorry for your loss.
:hug:
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