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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:17 PM
Original message
I am filled with lust...
C'mon, people...please...it's coming toward time for me to dress up in tight clothes and go out into public -- you can't leave me like this... :scared:
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:18 PM
Response to Original message
1. And just what would you like us
to do about that? :shrug:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:20 PM
Response to Reply #1
5. I don't know, exactly. But
you're not helping reduce it any....


:o



:hide:


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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:21 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. Oh hey now
I've been good today. Go blame your lust on someone else. :D
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:24 PM
Response to Reply #6
9. That's true
And there are plenty of candidates hereabouts to blame... ;-)
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miss_american_pie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #9
13. There certainly are
I think it's Lara's fault for her shirt pic. :evilgrin:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:31 PM
Response to Reply #13
15. I didn't want to name names but, in short,
yes. :D
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:18 PM
Response to Original message
2. Maggie Thatcher
Barbara Bush
Katherine Harris


:evilgrin: You're welcome.
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:20 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. *SNORK!!*
:spray: :rofl:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:21 PM
Response to Reply #2
7. Oh, great. You went too far.
Now I'm impotent...


:cry:


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sakabatou Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #7
11. As Gluttony from FMA said:
"You hurt my Lust!"
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:32 PM
Response to Reply #11
16. It's easy to hurt!
Ouch.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:30 PM
Response to Reply #7
14. Never mind. Saved by the
belle...




Yes, I know she's evil incarnate, but parts of me won't listen to me... :-(




That photo makes my fetlocks all tingly.

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idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #14
19. That is true desperation...let me help
Here's one I've been ruminating on for the past few minutes



and I said ruminating, not....
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:36 PM
Response to Reply #19
23. Obrigado!
:D

I don't blame you for having a good old rumination, either. Very nice. :-)
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Guava Jelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:19 PM
Response to Original message
3. Get in line!! I been filled with lust all day
I cant get my cats to pay attn to me let alone lustful Women :)
:rofl:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #3
8. Trust me
You don't want me anywhere behind you right now... :o
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Guava Jelly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:25 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. Ouch!!
With Ladies like Map and such..I feel your pain..Ouch!!! quit it Forrest!! I like you and all but not that way!! :rofl:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:33 PM
Response to Reply #12
17. Shoot...that's what they ALL say
:-(
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:25 PM
Response to Original message
10. Now, you know that we've all been absolute little angels all day
You can't blame it on us.

This time.

O8)
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:35 PM
Response to Reply #10
20. Look! There's one now!
:o

And she's gloating! :P
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:40 PM
Response to Reply #20
26. ACK!!!
Me? Gloating? What...I haven't done anything. I've been nauseatingly good. I mean, church choir good. I mean...

I haven't done anything at all, dangbabit.

Yet.

But it is Monday night. And Mondays are dangerous...






:evilgrin:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:46 PM
Response to Reply #26
28. How are Tuesday mornings, for you?
'cos that's when I'll be back. :evilgrin:

Danger is my middle name, baby. ;-)






Well, no, it isn't -- not technically...not yet, anyway. My middle name is Algernon, but I'm having it legally changed to 'Danger' this week....

A minor technical detail.
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:06 PM
Response to Reply #28
32. They ain't Monday nights...
But they're better than Wednesday afternoons Margaret Thatcher. Which are, in turn, better than Thursday mornings Ann Coulter. Thursday mornings are preferable to Friday afternoons Madelaine Albright and Saturday's just out of the question entirely Katherine Harris. Sunday nights work, though Janet Reno.

Still...Monday....





All better?
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:09 PM
Response to Reply #32
34. I think I'm feeling
better worse! :shrug:
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:16 PM
Response to Reply #34
37. You'll be fine
Just get dressed and get out there and you'll forget all about...everything else.

You'll see.

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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 06:29 AM
Response to Reply #37
41. Apparently, I wasn't the only one out there filled with lust
:o

It was an interesting night -- just got back around 4 AM. Wow. Busy, too, especially for a Monday night -- felt more like a good weekend night. The Strip's been slow for months and it's great to see it starting to come right. Had a great night. Made decent money but -- even better than that -- for a change, nobody was an idiot. It was pretty hot again tonight, so I was sweating a fair bit and, apparently, I was emitting some pretty powerful pheromones. :-)

I think my lips are bruised. But I had fun. I've been getting more kissing practice in the last few weeks than in the past several years, and it's not only very nice and very therapeutic, but will ensure I'm good and ready for The Woman Of My Dreams when she shows up. :D
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reyd reid reed Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 09:43 AM
Response to Reply #41
56. Sounds like you had a great time...
And it was your earlier -- discomfort -- that did it. It must've added to the pheremones. Given 'em a little boost or something.

Feeling....sated?

Now get some sleep.



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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 05:52 PM
Response to Reply #56
57. Got some sleep
:D

And, yeah, it was a more fun night on the job than I've had in a couple of weeks. I even danced. :o

This was after the real work was over, when my partner and I went to hang out at a club as we often do after a good night (both of us have some asocial tendencies, so maybe adopting another persona helps ameliorate that in a sort of Clark Kent-Superman way, and we have a lot of post-work fun being treated like sex objects for a while by the women in that place). I haven't danced in years...many years, actually. In fact -- wow -- just realized it's been easily a decade and maybe longer since I danced at all in public with a woman (man, either, for that matter). I've obviously done the Elvis martial-dance stuff -- always felt a bit of a kinship there in that he wasn't given to dancing, either, even though he moved onstage like few men ever did -- and so on, but dancing dancing is just different. I never was much of a dancer, by nature, and was always hard to get on a dance floor, but once I was up there I'd go for it (albeit in a fairly unorthodox manner of dancing, compared to the people around me who actually either learned this stuff from an instructor or from TV shows and films) and work out, hard, until the music stopped at the end of the night. I was always a very enthusiastic and highly aerobic dancer, once I got going, and tended to be pretty showy and otherwise the opposite of my normal 'default' demeanor. It's that same 'switch' that I make when I go on to perform, whether it's singing or TV stuff, or whatever else, or giving a talk, etc...it's all basically the same, and that apparent personality switch is a very common trait, it seems, especially among performers of any kind (and here I include lecturers and others, not just showbiz types like actors, singers, etc). I would even slide on my knees (not on a small, crowded floor, of course) and do all that funky stuff like my Dancing Machine alter ego was the world's biggest disco showoff. :-)

I'm hard to miss, too, because of my height. Harder to miss dressed like Elvis, of course.

I've been asked to dance before in this club and when we walked through bars and stuff (like Margaritaville) but I've always begged off by virtue of exhaustion -- which was usually true by the end of a night -- and I've plainly annoyed and offended some rather foxy mamas by turning them down. Luckily, my partner talked to some of them afterward to impress upon them just how much I'd exerted myself over the evening so I more often than not ended up getting a sympathy hug and a kiss on the cheek, at least, and am finally beginning to understand the whole 'wingman' concept. :D

Last night (this morning, actually) this really insistent woman tried to get me out on the dance floor and I just did my usual "I'm tired...f*** off" (okay, not quite like that) thing, being terminally dance-floor-phobic. I was busy, anyway, taking lots of pictures with lots of people and enjoying Close Encounters of the Snuggly Kind, but she kept coming back and putting me on the spot again. I finally gave in when a petite blonde conspired with her to get me out there and grabbed my arm to lead me off, which pretty much sealed my fate. The key was that the band introduced we pretend-Elvises, as they always do (but at least they didn't shine a spotlight on us, this time), and started playing "That's All Right." So I was kinda stuck. I had no idea what to do. Throughout the night I'd heard a few James Brown songs playing on PA systems and the like and every time I heard one I went into my James Brown dance impersonation (it's really not bad, though I drew the line at dropping down into a near-split...always good to have something else lined up if the Elvis thing falls through), each time prompting my bemused partner to ask what the hell I was doing. So -- naturally -- when I started dancing with this girl I was the Godfather of Soul, dressed like the King of Rock 'n' Roll. :D

It was fun, but I still was happy when the song ended (I finished by dipping her almost to the floor and she played it up well by laying out there with arms thrown out above her head and dramatic look on her face, pretty much like Fay Wray did in King Kong's hand...actually, she could have been a body double for Fay Wray) and I could escape the dance floor. I admitted to her that I had no idea what I was doing -- most of the people seemed to be doing one of those low-energy, formalized little country-style dances (one step, two step, half step, or whatever the hell) and I told her I didn't know how to do that, so I mixed my James Brown with a little '50s Elvis, a little '70s Elvis (restraining myself with the arm movements, though, not wanting to knock anyone out), a little Masai let's-go-kill-a-lion dance, and a fair bit of random hand-holding stuff, like some kind of psychedelic jitterbug and lots of twirling her around and dipping her way down (she must have weighed about 100 lbs and I could have picked her up with one hand, which is just as well because she seemed to trust me absolutely when, in fact, the odds of me dropping her to the floor were rather high). She was a great dance partner, and not only didn't seem to mind my funkily esoteric style, or non-style, but gamely followed me every unpredictable step of the way. She was pretty, too, though I really was too focused on trying to keep moving in some coordinated manner while not dropping her or sending her spinning out of control across the floor to really look that much at her.

My favorite part was probably when I put my hand around her waist, and she followed suit with mine, and I spun around and around at increasing speed with her whipping around beside me, until everything around us was literally a blur (my leather-soled boots on that slick dance floor really helped me spin quickly, just like they helped me with my James Brown moves). Neither one of us threw up and she seemed to get a kick out of that spinning, and then I threw the brakes on and dropped her into a low dip from there. I mean, if I could have just followed that with a bit of a tango (and, darn it, why didn't I think of that in the moment?), I would have been so swave and deboner that I couldn't stand being with myself. Next time, maybe. :-)

Not that I'm in a hurry for the next time...I'll undoubtedly offend many more women in that club and elsewhere before I relent to dancing again, but I did enjoy it even though it was under duress and even though I had absolutely no idea what I was doing. Maybe I should take advantage of some of these dance request, though, because with a little practice I might actually have a chance of honing my approach into something a little less "Ripley's Believe It Or Not" and, besides, you never know how many potential love connections I've squandered with my cad-like behavior toward prospective dance partners. It's not like most men -- myself included, when I've been other than dressed as Elvis -- have the chance to get asked to dance by a bunch of attractive women, so I really do owe it to my sex (by which I mean my gender) to not drop the ball here, and not turn down such opportunities. It's good exercise, too, the way I do it! And, as always, what I lacked in coherent style as a result of my esoteric approach to dancing (more so this time than ever, because I hadn't danced in so many years) I more than made up for in enthusiasm and level of exertion -- I may not have been the smoothest dancer out there on the floor, but I was ten times more vigorous and committed in my physical approach than were those half-asleep half-stepping sons of bitches who were just going through the motions... :D

And, odd and incoherent as my dance may have been, at least I didn't bite my lip throughout. I didn't bite hers, either, though at one point I enclosed my right hand around her entire right breast (entirely by accident, during a spin -- I apologized, but she didn't mind).

Got to get on the good foot...hnyuh!!
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deadparrot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:34 PM
Response to Original message
18. Go to church, sinner.
Jesus is coming. Like, tomorrow. :evilgrin:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #18
24. I'm going to the Vegas Strip. Does that count?
Sure are a lot of people praying there.

:P

Maybe I'll see Jesus there (or, at least, one of his impersonators)
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Aristus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
21. If you're filled with lust, then
you're on the WRONG website. :evilgrin:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:40 PM
Response to Reply #21
25. Well, I've been kinda storing it up
I think I'm gonna blow.


(don't be rude)



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idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:52 PM
Response to Reply #25
30. is that why there is no
boxer shorts pic in this thread?
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:05 PM
Response to Reply #30
31. You got it
:rofl:

:D
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NewWaveChick1981 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
22. Get dressed, Lust Boy.
Edited on Mon Aug-21-06 06:38 PM by NewWaveChick1981
:evilgrin: That lust'll still be there when you get home. Just think about Ann Coulter and those pants won't give you away...

:*
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:43 PM
Response to Reply #22
27. Yes, ma'am!
Oooo...I love it when she orders me about, especially when it comes to telling me how I should be clothed. :evilgrin:






Wait. Ann Coulter?

:o

Boy, you sure know how to change the mood... :-(



You just wait. Once I get hold of that D&G Masculine....bwahaaaaaaaa...yeah, baby. :D

Then I'll be doin' the ordering around here...

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mwdem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 06:51 PM
Response to Reply #27
29. I'm still thinking about that "leash" thing we discussed earlier.
Edited on Mon Aug-21-06 06:53 PM by mwdem
...and you didn't seem to like it. :evilgrin:
But lust is a good thing!
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:08 PM
Response to Reply #29
33. Much depends on
where the leash is tied... :o





And lust ain't so good in a pair of tight pants. Not for a male, for sure. Not in public. Not even in Sin City. It scares the horses. :D




And then there's the friction....



:hide:


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mwdem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:10 PM
Response to Reply #33
35. Hey, just have fun!
Hope to see you next spring...tight pants and all. I won't bring a leash, just my SO.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:14 PM
Response to Reply #35
36. No leash, but the old ball and chain?
:P

If I'm still here -- I'm sure I most likely will be -- I'll see y'all then (and I promise to not be filled with lust). :hi:
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mwdem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:18 PM
Response to Reply #36
38. You can be filled with whatever you want!
You'd better be there! My ball & chain may not have time to partake, but I'll let you know what the date will be! :hi:
(I'm really shy, but I would like to see your act!)
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 06:22 AM
Response to Reply #38
40. I'm really shy, too
I mean, except for all the gold and the jumpsuits, and stuff... :D

It would be great. I'd better be there!
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NewWaveChick1981 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 07:57 AM
Response to Reply #27
49. I was trying to make it easier for you to get into costume without a pokie
:P I didn't mean to scare the bejeezus out of you by mentioning Coultergeist. :hug:

And you'd better alert me when you get that D&G.... :loveya:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 08:01 AM
Response to Reply #49
50. Pokie?
:rofl:

Now, young lady, how the heck am I supposed to tackle the song "Pokie Polk Salad Annie" from now on? :P

You'll be the first to know when I get that D&G. I'll even start soaking each of my posts to you in the stuff... :evilgrin:

And thank you for hugging the bejeezus back into me....I needed that. :hug:
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buddhamama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Aug-21-06 07:25 PM
Response to Original message
39. Sing one for me
:loveya:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 06:33 AM
Response to Reply #39
42. I'll sing 'em ALL for you...

:D

Including this one!:

I Just Can't Help Believin'

:loveya:
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buddhamama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 06:57 AM
Response to Reply #42
44. you wouldn't happen to be
commenting on my somewhat elusive nature with this song, would ya'? :)

I listened to it, thanks. It's a Great song to begin the day with.

I hope you thoroughly enjoyed your night, and sated your lust. :hug:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 07:04 AM
Response to Reply #44
45. Lust only got worse
:evilgrin:

But everything else got better. :D

I'm glad you like the song, you elusive dream, you... :hug:

I hope your day does start out great, and ends having been even greater.

:hi:
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billyskank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 06:34 AM
Response to Original message
43. All day every day
that is my life. Sigh.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 07:55 AM
Response to Reply #43
47. Get thee a jumpsuit
and come join me. :D

If nothing else, it'll help a little in propping up your male ego, if it's drooping. It's hot work, though!

See? You look more like Elvis than do a lot of the Elvises I've seen: :D









And -- darn it -- it works! The proof: :headbang:







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billyskank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 08:02 AM
Response to Reply #47
51. Good heavens!
I have been Elvisified! :spray:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 08:04 AM
Response to Reply #51
52. Elvis is everywhere!
Embrace your Inner Elvis.... :D
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buddhamama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 08:18 AM
Response to Reply #52
53. Mojo Nixon said it...
Best

When I look out into your eyes out there,
When I look out into your faces,
You know what I see?
I see a little bit of Elvis
In each and every one of you out there.
Lemme tell ya...
Weeeeeeeeeellllllll...
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Elvis is everywhere, man!
He's in everything.
He's in everybody...
Elvis is in your jeans.
He's in your cheesburgers
Elvis is in Nutty Buddies!
Elvis is in your mom!
He's in everybody.
He's in the young, the old,
the fat, the skinny,
the white, the black
the brown and the blue
people got Elvis in 'em too
Elvis is in everybody out there.
Everybody's got Elvis in them!
Everybody except one person that is...
Yeah, one person!
The evil opposite of Elvis.
The Anti-Elvis
Anti-Elvis got no Elvis in 'em,
lemme tell ya.
Michael J. Fox has no Elvis in him.
And Elvis is in Joan Rivers
but he's trying to get out, man!
He's trying to get out!
Listen up Joanie Baby!
Elvis is everywhere
Elvis is everything
Elvis is everybody
Elvis is still the king
Man o man
What I want you to see
Is that the big E's
Inside of you and me
Man, there's a lot of unexplained phenomenon
out there in the world.
Lot of things people say
What the heck's going on?
Let me tell ya!
Who built the pyramids?
ELVIS!
Who built Stonehenge?
ELVIS!
Yeah, man you see guys
walking down the street
pushing shopping carts
and you think they're talking to allah,
they're talking to themself.
Man, no they're talking to ELVIS!
ELVIS! ELVIS!
You know whats going on in that Bermuda Triangle?
Down in the Bermuda Traingle
Elvis needs boats.
Elvis needs boats.
Elvis Elvis Elvis
Elvis Elvis Elvis
Elvis needs boats.
Aahh! The Sailing Elvis!
Captain Elvis!
Commodore Elvis it is.


http://www.ilyric.net/Lyrics/M/Mojo-Nixon/Elvis-Is-Ever...
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 08:21 AM
Response to Reply #53
54. buddhamama got her mojo workin'!
:D

Mojo Nixon is, indeed, a wise man.
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 07:21 AM
Response to Original message
46. Aren't you always?
:silly:
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 07:57 AM
Response to Reply #46
48. Well, now, that's just
nitpicking.... :P
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-22-06 09:33 AM
Response to Reply #48
55. Hey... I resemble that remark
:silly:
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