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OMG, I just hit on the "rants and raves" feature of tripadvisor. The rants are way funnier than the raves. There are about 30 not-funny-and-yet-really-funny "Holiday From Hell" reviews from various UK-ers for this place in Greece, Hotel Belvedere. Check this one out:
My review for the hotel belvedere is this: Its foul, the staff are rude and heavy handed. I was chased after with a pair of scissors by the manager Chris so he could cut off my all inclusive band. He was threatening and the other manager Nick and he were predatorial when young girls were alone, I my friend and I would confirm. The food is disgusting, its normally food from the day before cold and hard with fly’s crawling all over it, depositing bacteria with their scampering little feet. The rooms had no hot water and we had a side of building view with a huge bush hanging over the balcony, home to many little and large pests which were happy to take up residence in our room. All inclusive drinks were watered down wine, never served from a bottle and never chilled, served from a little carafe kept under the bar with no real protection from the heat, yum. There was beer served out of warm cans and the management told the staff to say there was no beer/watered down wine stuff/coke etc when they decided we had had enough for one night. One night the manager Chris decided to jump in the pool, the next two guests did, only they were sent home, shame the belvedere owners cant send the managers home really and let us run the hotel with blindfolds and a good tub of industrial bleach. The morale of the story, don’t go to the belvedere, instead of happy holiday snaps and souvenirs and happy memories. You will end your stay dying to get on the plane so you can have your airplane meal, angry, tired, out of pocket with our good friend Mr and Mrs Sam-N-Ella having a little incubation nap ready for your arrival home.
Go at your own peril
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