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Well, I'm apparently not very good at this guy thing

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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:32 PM
Original message
Well, I'm apparently not very good at this guy thing
at least not compared to some of the other fellas I know.

I don't watch sports, nor care about the outcome most of the time. If I am watching hockey, I change the channel if there's a fight. I don't hunt nor fish, and I find NASCAR and monster truch rallies to be massive wastes of fossil fuel.

I don't care for porn, of any kind, really. I don't scratch nor belch with any pride.

I don't own any leather shoes. I rinse and lather, but I do NOT repeat. I use conditioner. My soaps are exotic and smell of patchouli and lavender. They come from far away places.

When I go to the gym, I don't stare at the spandex Bambi no matter how she bounces on the treadmill. I also don't grunt and groan through every set.

I don't eat meat, and I don't even own a bbq-thing-device. I own only the very basic power tools (drill, circular saw, etc).

I copycat threads posted by girls saying that they aren't good at being girls.

What is a boy to do? :shrug:
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LeftyMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
1. Hi sweetie.
Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 06:42 PM by LeftyMom
I think we can agree that gender stereotypes suck. :*

BTW, LK, Sunshine and Turquoise (his two plastic turtle friends) say hi. :hi:
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bridgit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:38 PM
Response to Original message
2. good question, time to consult the Dada Oracle...
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idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:39 PM
Response to Reply #2
4. I'm skeered of it.
will it hurt me?
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bridgit Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:41 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. it's harmless, in fact it's less than harmless it's meaningless...
:rofl:
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idgiehkt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:38 PM
Response to Original message
3. hmmm, judging by what I just saw of your work in that other thread
I'd say you are, in fact, good at the guy thing, lol. better than many I've seen, in fact.
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ForrestGump Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:44 PM
Response to Original message
6. Don't worry about it. 'cos, in the end,
you got the girl... :headbang:
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
7. Be more manly, like me. I carry a purse and wear a ponytail, AND
I barely have any hair to make one with!
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:24 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. Alright, hold on...
is it a purse or a murse or a man-bag, or what?

I had a ponytail for a very, very long time so that's not getting it.
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:36 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. A murse?
Thanks, flvegan. You just gave me a genuine belly-laugh with that one! :rofl:
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jobycom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 10:11 PM
Response to Reply #8
31. Man bag, or as I called it when I used to sell, a European man's bag.
What the heck is a murse?
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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:33 PM
Response to Original message
9. That must be why you rescue pit bulls to enhance your manliness.
Seriously though, be careful with that KMF Patchouli stuff, if you get pulled over by a dickwad townie cop. They don't understand that body care products can smell like patchouli and they'll try to harass you and search your car. At least, that's what my experience was.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:38 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. My rescue work is even less manly.
I take it the worst of the worst, and next thing you know, I'm zrrbrrting pitbull bellies, much to their delight. How manly is that?

And they can search my car. I don't like it, but that's okay. Besides, the look on their face when I tell them that the smell is "the scent of far away spices applied via soaps and moisturizers" is priceless, coming from someone that looks like me.
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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:46 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. I imagine the look on their face would be priceless.
And pit bulls have perfect bellies for zrrbrrting. I miss the foster pit bull I had for a week. He was so cool (and scared to death of one of my cats). Unfortunately, I can't really have a permanent dog right now though.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:59 PM
Response to Reply #13
16. Priceless? Oh, yes.
This one guy we have here was used as bait and left for dead. He's a pit as much as the day is long. He's afraid of his own shadow. I'll start petting him, rubbing those ears, talking baby talk...then, when on his back, he sees me go for that belly. He gets the big zrrbrrt and looks at me like, "why would you motorboat my tumtum, daddy?"
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HarukaTheTrophyWife Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #16
21. The one I had was left chained up with no food, water, shelter...
after his owners were evicted. He was out there for a week or so, but he was a little lucky because it happened by a school, so kids were hopping the fence to feed & play with him. Also, it was in a ghetto and no one took him for bait. Despite a crappy start, he was all tail wagging and doggie kisses and surprisingly not food aggressive in the slightest. He liked my other cats, but Midnight went after him, so he would run away from her. Now he's in another hopefully permanent home.

Midnight is an 8lb nearly toothless cat that just doesn't take shit from anything. She used to beat up our 95lb German Shepherd and she enjoys trapping the black lab we have on weekends in closets. Just backs the poor thing right into that closet and then won't let her out. Of course, she's also has a "red file" (dangerous) folder at the vet's office and she once got trapped outside in a blizzard for two weeks. She came home super skinny, but otherwise totally fine. She's a badass that has earned her little black leather spiked collar.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:15 PM
Response to Reply #21
24. I hear you. My best example, is this girl
About to get her ass stolen, dammit



Half hour later, emergency vet...flvegan ain't letting go



I've posted these before, but it seemed fitting.
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Dangerously Amused Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:52 PM
Response to Reply #24
29. God, that last picture tugs at my heartstrings every time I see it.





I just want to get down on that floor and hug both of you.


:hug:


Do you still have her?




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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 09:24 PM
Response to Reply #29
30. Still have her?
No. She's living the life with her new family. The dad is very special there. He's her me.

We get updates, but all parties are very, very happy. AND, I might add, she has changed the hearts and minds of folks that didn't like "pitbulls" in the past.
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Fox Mulder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:45 PM
Response to Original message
12. I'm not a very good guy, either.
Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 08:00 PM by Fox Mulder
I'm just like you in those respects except I do like my porn.
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:00 PM
Response to Reply #12
17. Hmmm...convince me.
What kind/type of porn? Any particular individuals involved?

I think that I could learn to like it. A lot.
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Fox Mulder Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:02 PM
Response to Reply #17
19. No particular individuals...
Edited on Thu Aug-10-06 08:02 PM by Fox Mulder
it all depends upon what mood I'm in.

Hard to explain...everyone has his/her own individual tastes.

:shrug:
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:08 PM
Response to Reply #19
22. I should really treat porn like cowbell.
More...explore the space...gotta have more...
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Dangerously Amused Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:48 PM
Response to Original message
14. You just described the perfect man, in my opinion.




Your killer good looks are just icing on the cake, baby.






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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:01 PM
Response to Reply #14
18. You are too nice to me.
I'll save the rest for a PM...
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Redstone Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 07:49 PM
Response to Original message
15. Feh. Ain't none of that has nothing to do with being a man.
(Even though I do some of the stuff you don't.)

Being a man means taking responsibility, and that statement about covers everything.

And you take responsibility, as you feel you need to. So that makes you a guy's guy, at least to this particular guy.

Anyone else doesn't think so? Fuck 'em.

Redstone
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:07 PM
Response to Reply #15
20. Yeah, I'm with that.
Regardless of what we don't agree upon, I've got the Redstone blessing. What I do that you don't, and what you do that I don't...don't matter here unless we hit a crossroads of discussion.

Redstone...always genuine...don't let that sig fool you.
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begin_within Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:14 PM
Response to Original message
23. Nobody here is complaining! You have all the working parts, right?
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:16 PM
Response to Reply #23
25. Last time I checked.
I might need an update, though. Just to be sure.

Kind of like adaware...you know, "your definitions are 14 days old..."
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begin_within Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #25
26. You have all the assets of a man, and none of the liabilites.
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Dangerously Amused Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:48 PM
Response to Reply #26
28. And a mighty fine asset at that.




Mmm Mmm Mmm, yessir!


:9



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begin_within Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-11-06 03:30 AM
Response to Reply #28
32. Oh, so you've already had a crack at him.
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Dangerously Amused Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-11-06 08:17 AM
Response to Reply #32
34. Not yet the crack I'd like, and I am a tenacious girl.




= sigh =


Look, a girl can dream, can't she?

Leave me to my dreams, you cad! They're all I have! = sob =












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begin_within Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-11-06 11:19 AM
Response to Reply #34
35. Don't give up... maybe he'll turn the other cheek
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arwalden Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-10-06 08:32 PM
Response to Original message
27. What About Phone Sex? That's Kinda Like Porn, Right?
Well, it's interactive "porn".
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RFKHumphreyObama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-11-06 06:39 AM
Response to Original message
33. I also fit into this category
I am generally not interested in watching sports and will generally only find out the result if I think it is going to be a topic of conversation in my social life. NASCAR and monster truck rallies and those kind of events have never appealed to me

I have enjoyed books by authors like Jane Austen and Charlotte Bronte. I enjoyed the TV miniseries of "Pride and Prejudice" immensely and also enjoyed the movie adaptation of Emma (both of which I have on tape). I get emotional at the end of movies and in other circumstances. I also like reading some books such as those Chicken Soup for the whatever series and so on

I'm hopeless at fixing things or using power tools

I try to place an emphasis on good manners and etiquette

I like some types of shopping -although mostly for CDs and books -and will spend hours in a shopping centre.
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Rhiannon12866 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 12:28 AM
Response to Original message
36. You're a guy of the 21st century.
The old rules for guys no longer apply and you're doing just fine, better than most, in fact... :thumbsup:

Rhiannon :pals:
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 12:30 AM
Response to Original message
37. You convinced me.
;)

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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 12:30 AM
Response to Original message
38. What you need...
is a Hummer!!! I just saw the commercial. Takes all the girliness out of a tofu-eatin', non-gruntin' type like yourself!
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:01 AM
Response to Reply #38
40. I see. Thank you.
Now, all I need is someone to give me a Hummer.

Okay, that was wrong.
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:07 AM
Response to Reply #40
41. Umm, I thought that base was covered
You know, she who truly hates me. Or has something changed?

Btw, I really didn't think about the double entendre. It's Saturday night, I'm going over my sermon--I couldn't possibly think about sex!
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:16 AM
Response to Reply #41
42. Not that I want to bring you to my level
but, how can you NOT think about sex?

Just asking...
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:20 AM
Response to Reply #42
43. I can't think about sex and a sermon AT THE SAME TIME
or my sermons end up wierd. But I recently raised one parishioner's brow, when I stated that, by the traditional understanding of the term...I am not celibate.

Oh, and when I moved recently, and had parishioners help, i threw out my electric boyfriend--so as not to embarass them or me. Just ordered a new one. WAiting, waiting...
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flvegan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:30 AM
Response to Reply #43
44. Electric boyfriend?
Oh, my. Buzzz, buzzz.

I'm sorry, that wasn't right. I can't imagine...I think about sex all the time, and I think a sermon just wouldn't happen with me.

I am glad that there are folks like you that are more mature and able than I.
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Critters2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 01:33 AM
Response to Reply #44
45. Actually, I've been proofing a book for a friend about
Christian vegetarianism that you'd find interesting. Girardian analysis and the like.

If I don't get it done soon, I may learn just how serious he is about non-violence!


'Night!
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fujiyama Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 12:54 AM
Response to Original message
39. LOL
your thread gave me an ad for "french soaps".

BTW, don't worry about all that other crap. I rarely eat meat. I fell asleep when my friends took me to a monster truck. And watching a car go around a track repeatedly bores me to death.

And as ya said, you got the Redstone blessing. You're set.

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Evoman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 02:55 AM
Response to Original message
46. Describes me to a tee, I'm exactly like you..cept I get girls like MAD.
Well, I used to. I have a long term girlfriend now, so no more of those shenanigans.

The only things I differ on:

I Dont use conditioner, I dont have exotic soap (Irish springs!), I eat meat, and when I go to the gym, I COVERTLY stare at the jiggle.

And if your not groaning and grunting at the gym, your not lifting enough! Although, don't do one of those roid screams..lol..those are dumb. HEYYYAAAAAAAHHHHHGRRRRRRRR
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Tenseiga Donating Member (100 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-13-06 09:03 AM
Response to Original message
47. Ten sez
"If I am watching hockey, I change the channel if there's a fight"
:wtf:

"I rinse and lather, but I do NOT repeat. I use conditioner"
too much shampoo is bad for your scalp... and conditioner is OK, but don't overdue it, and definitely not every day

"I copycat threads posted by girls saying that they aren't good at being girls"
don't worry, it's lame when the girls do it too :spank:
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