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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:48 AM
Original message
I am too good for this world
Edited on Tue Mar-21-06 04:50 AM by MissHoneychurch
I trust people too easily and I always expect them to live after the same morals as I do. And I get hurt over and over again.
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:50 AM
Response to Original message
1. That makes two of us.

:(
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:50 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. It sucks, doesn't it
:hug:
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:53 AM
Response to Reply #2
5. I've grown very tired of the whole thing.

Because I don't like playing games.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:55 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. Exactly
and because I don't play games I expect others to be fair as well. But unfortunately they don't always play fair.

And you know who I am talking of.
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:04 AM
Response to Reply #7
14. I am way too forgiving. I think everyone can have a change of heart.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:08 AM
Response to Reply #14
17. Forgiving is something I don't do often
if somebody hurt me really bad, it will be a good-bye forever.

my problem is that I trust people right from the beginning, expecting them to treat me fair and don't play with my emotions.
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:13 AM
Response to Reply #17
18. I trust the people I care about.
Until they give me a reason to think I cannot.

You could say ~ I offer the olive branch, treating others as I wish to be treated.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:17 AM
Response to Reply #18
21. This is a saying I live by
I don't do to others what I don't want to be done to myself.
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:26 AM
Response to Reply #21
23. Unfortunately
We aren't always treated with the same respect and consideration that we offer to others. I don't let people bring me down to their level however I do dissociate myself from them when I realize the relationship is potentially harmful to my own peace of mind.
Bottom line ~ I Love Me. I'm willing to give someone a second chance but rarely a third.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:29 AM
Response to Reply #23
24. I got to that point myself by now
I love myself the way I am and if somebody isn't happy with that ... please leave. I am not willing anymore to give myself up for anybody.
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:33 AM
Response to Reply #24
25. Bottom Line:
When I look at the face in the mirror, I need to be happy with me.
If I can honestly feel that I'm doing the right things for the right reasons ~ well ...
'nuff said.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:37 AM
Response to Reply #25
26. You say it
that is the bottom line.

Your inside is out when your outside is in
Your outside is in when your inside is out.

From: The Beatles - Everybody's Got Something to Hide Exept for Me & My Monkey

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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:51 AM
Response to Original message
3. Me three.
But let me tell you something, MissHoney (and Joani Baby, too). Far better to be a good person, than to sink to the level that so many people have. Yes, we are vulnerable to the meanness of others, but when all is said and done, being mean says a lot more about THEM than it does about US!

Please don't ever lose your goodness! :loveya: :hug: :loveya:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:54 AM
Response to Reply #3
6. I won't
i could never be really mean (beside teasing) to other people. It isn't the way I was raised. But it got me in emotional distress more than once.
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:57 AM
Original message
I know, sweetie. Me too.
But I cannot lower myself to that level, of meaness, and such. There are plenty of good people in the world too. I prefer to be like them.

:loveya:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:20 AM
Response to Original message
22. Yes there are
but they seem to vanish sometimes. Except here :)


:loveya:
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Clintmax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:53 AM
Response to Original message
4. I think that's true of a lot of people, Miss Honey.
I'm sorry you get hurt like that. :hug: I wish I could prevent anyone hurting you, my dear. :hug:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:57 AM
Response to Reply #4
9. Thanks Clint
I am not getting hurt these days but it hurt in the past and it sucks to have to hold back from people in the future because of the experiences I made.
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BelleCarolinaPeridot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:56 AM
Response to Original message
8. Me four .
That must be going around . I put people on too high of a pedestal . And I also expect everyone to be smart - I forget that stupid people do exist . And it surprises me so much when people don't give a damn about themselves , when they could be doing so much better than what they do that they take the easy way out not give a damn . Why do I surround myself with such people ? I won't anymore . I am talking about my ex . This guy is a stupid bastard . I don't know why I care - I don't anymore . Its his life and I know that my life is much better . Its just that the good in me always wants to see people doing better , but if he does'nt care , why should I care ? I tried to be civil and be a friend to this punk but some people just don't know what nice means anymore . They throw away the good and accept the bad - people are just stupid . That's all there is too it . And I am just walking away . Don't mind me - I am still venting ...
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SeattleGirl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:04 AM
Response to Reply #8
13. CP, there is nothing wrong with wanting to see people do better
I think that is a very admirable quality, and I know that sometimes people DO respond to that. But for those who don't, well, we just have to let them go. It's not always easy, but we cannot let ourselves be dragged down by them.

I know you're still hurting and venting, and that's good. But don't ever try to hide or bury that good part of yourself. You are such a good person, and it's an honor to know you.

:hug:
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BelleCarolinaPeridot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:44 AM
Response to Reply #13
27. Yes I know that I am a good person ...
and I honestly think that this world has gone to hell - I am a good person , no matter how much bad is sent my way , I never want to hurt others the way that they treat me because its just a waste of time . I was doing so good , just doing my own thing and I had a great KICK ASS week last week - and then to find out that this bastard was talking about me , it hurt me .
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:05 AM
Response to Reply #8
15. It sucks, doesn't it?
and you seem to have the same talent to pick the suckers as boyfriends.

You did the right thing for your own best. And some people just don't want to be helped. They are an emotional drainage.

:hug:
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BelleCarolinaPeridot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:45 AM
Response to Reply #15
28. I am starting to really want to be myself for the rest of my life ...
but I know that as soon as I say that , I meet someone new . The wound was healing but someone just re-opened it and it sucks .
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:52 AM
Response to Reply #28
31. OH NO!!!!
that is bad!!!!

Love yourself and be yourself no matter who you let in your life. I learned it the hard way. It might sound selfish, but put yourself on the first place and be happy. With or without man.
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 08:06 AM
Response to Reply #28
39. Ding ding ding! That's the ticket, LOL--I said that about a year ago
and it's working just ducky. Man, who needs them and their ridiculous ego trips and drama and problems?

I haven't met anyone new either, so that's helped. ;)
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Starbucks Anarchist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:57 AM
Response to Original message
10. ...
:hug:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:07 AM
Response to Reply #10
16. Thanks
:hug:
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Robeson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:57 AM
Response to Original message
11. That's tough MissHoneychurch....
...it's a balancing act between being perpetually cynical and perpetually open. I hope you can find balance in between.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:14 AM
Response to Reply #11
19. I am still searching the right balance.
I tend to be open very fast if I like someone.
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DarkmoonIkonoklast Donating Member (829 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-22-06 09:19 PM
Response to Reply #19
44. If one man might offer his POV...
MMI decided years ago that I could either a) be open, and risk the pain, or b) be guarded and become cynical...

MMI chose to take the pain...

MMI couldn't see any justification for blaming "the next one" for the sins of "the last one"... guess I've never been much for "presumptive guilt"...

MMMiss Honey, Joanie, SG, CP, please realize that we are not ALL looking for a mommy, arm candy, barbettes or Paris Hilton-oids... some of us are still searching for a woman companion of intellectual power, emotional depth and openness, spiritual and social commitment, and dedication to something outside of her own (or my own) skin! Some serious snuggle-osity (cuddle-iciousness?) wouldn't hurt either! :grouphug:

MMI've made more than my share of mistakes, mistaking a willingness to have (usually bad) sex for a willingness to share intimacy... and ending up with neither! I'm currently in recovery myself from the most recent such disappointment.

MM... and darlin's, I haven't talked to a chest since my sophomore year in high school (grad: class of 1965)! :rofl:

MMFor what it's worth, here's one man who has learned to value each and every one of you as warriors, as people whom I would trust to watch my back in a firefight... which this, I fear, might soon become. Sadly, I can not say the same for too many of the males of my acquaintance (although I suspect billyskank might be one such)... Please feel free to PM me anytime any of you feel the need of an additional male supporter or cheerleader!
:yourock:

MMYou are all, not "mere" Aces, but Goddesses in the Tarot Deck of my life! Thank you all for accepting me into yours! :toast: :loveya: :hug:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 08:58 AM
Response to Reply #44
47. Thank you Darkmoon
(I won't type your whole name since it is so long and a tonguebreaker :) )

I will add you to my buddy list so I have a short cut to you :hug:

In the end I chose the risk pain over and over again. It is the way I am. I want to love and want to be loved. And we all know that love can be painful. I think all of us have made that experience. And in the end - as cynical as we might seem - we all want love. It doesn't matter what kind of love. Just love.

:hug:
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DarkmoonIkonoklast Donating Member (829 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-24-06 04:03 AM
Response to Reply #47
62. You do me honor, dear lady...
MMSadly, I shall be off-line for the next week, so I'll not be able to converse with you... ;(

MMBe assured, however, that I look forward to re-connecting with you as soon as I'm back underground! :hug:

MMBetter the pain of love than the dullness of apathy and ennui. Besides, you know that a cynic is nothing more than a romantic with a few too many battle scars! :loveya: :hug:

MMSee you in a week or so!
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Random_Australian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 04:58 AM
Response to Original message
12. Q. how to get people to stop it? Or at least do it less...
I could write a book on that. Or at least some psychoanalyitical treatíse.

*sigh* You'll always have us, I hope. Have a :hug: for your sorrows.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:16 AM
Response to Reply #12
20. Oh I know I have DU to vent
and to look for comfort. And I alrady used it more than once, believe me.

:hug:
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NMMNG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:48 AM
Response to Original message
29. That will teach you.
You should be like me. Assume they are good, but reserve that little place inside that is skeptical, just so you aren't surprised if they turn out to be prats.

BTW, :hug:

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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:57 AM
Response to Reply #29
32. I better learn to do it
being skeptical is hard.


:hug:
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NMMNG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 06:17 AM
Response to Reply #32
33. Being skeptical can be too easy at times
After being abused by my peers for my entire childhood, it would be all to easy for me to assume everyone is a jerk until proven otherwise. However I prefer the method I mentioned--assume they are good, but keep some healthy skepticism just in case.
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Omphaloskepsis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 05:50 AM
Response to Original message
30. I expect to get fucked... And, not the good kind of fucked.
My sister and my aunt are the only folks that wouldn't kill me if they thought they were in my will. Seriously, the whole lot is a bunch of greedy fucks that celebrated my fathers death. It made them rich.. I ate Raman for five(5) years starting in the 5th grade. They bought expensive furniture while I starved.

My friends are cool.... I just hate my family.. I have issues..
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 06:42 AM
Response to Reply #30
34. Sometimes friends are more of a family
I am fortunate enough to have a caring family.

:hug:
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 07:40 AM
Response to Original message
35. My sister once told me something that helped me get through
this kind of crisis:

Expecting people to behave as you do is like expecting the lion to not eat you just because you're a vegetarian.

Some people are lions, and yeah, it'd be nice if everyone behaved themselves (and please I'm not trying to say that non-vegetarians don't behave themselves--I'm an omnivore myself--this is only an analogy) but it's just not going to happen.

:hug: You keep being good, but remember, being good doesn't mean you have to let people walk all over you.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 07:44 AM
Response to Reply #35
36. But unfortunately a lot of people
tend to walk over you or take advantage of you if you are a caring person. They draw everything out of you and leave you back scattered, trying to get things together again. And I am talking more about the emotions than anything else.
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MissMillie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 07:45 AM
Response to Reply #36
37. I know exactly what you mean
Why do you think that anytime anyone shows any interest in me, I go running as if my life depended on it?

So I sit here and say, do as I say, not as I do.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 07:47 AM
Response to Reply #37
38. Oh yes
feeling attracted to all the wrong guys and if someone shows up with a good heart and good intentions you don't trust him because of the bad experiences made.

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lcbart Donating Member (93 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 09:59 AM
Response to Original message
40. Me too....
Seperated nine months ago and went into single life thinking there had to be someone else out there for me.....


Surprise! after three mini relationships - I'm finding that maybe I'm better off alone.
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xmas74 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 10:02 AM
Response to Original message
41. Join the club.
I might be prickly and sarcastic but it's a coverup for how I really am.

I just hate getting hurt.
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wildhorses Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-21-06 10:05 AM
Response to Original message
42. me too, you
:hug:
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AirmensMom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Mar-22-06 01:01 PM
Response to Original message
43. Me, too, MissHoney.
:hug:
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Deja Q Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 08:47 AM
Response to Original message
45. Nobody's perfect.
:hug:

I trust too easily too. And wouldn't change it for the world, despite how vile some people can be.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 08:54 AM
Response to Reply #45
46. I don't think I am going to change much
I just wish there were more people that do the same and aren't bullshitters (sorry for the word).

Thanks HypnoToad :hug:
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:05 AM
Response to Original message
48. Me five.
Oy. I hear ya, dude. When you just expect people not to be assholes, and they keep teaching you that you're wrong. I'm sorry, MissHC. :hug:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:06 AM
Response to Reply #48
49. I just expect other to be fair
seems not to be possible with certain people these days.

:hug:
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:19 AM
Response to Reply #49
50. Fair?
Who needs fair? :rofl:

Sigh. I agree, it would be so nice if people would respect each other and be kind and just and considerate. Really, is that so much to ask?

:hug: Sorry for whatever happened that's bugging you...
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:25 AM
Response to Reply #50
51. Actually when I wrote that thread
I was just remembering the way certain guys treated me and it just sucked the way they played with me. Other than that I am fine these days. Have a date set up for this weekend (actually flying to London to visit him) and I will see how that will go. I am going to enjoy myself.
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LynzM Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 12:34 PM
Response to Reply #51
60. Ah....
Well, I'm glad nothing bad is going on for you right now! Flying to London for a date, cool. I hope you have a wonderful and fun time!! :bounce:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-24-06 08:11 AM
Response to Reply #60
64. Thanks LynzM
I sure will do my best that he and I have a wonderful time.
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Brewman_Jax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:32 AM
Response to Original message
52. I know the feeling
keep watching them.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:33 AM
Response to Reply #52
53. Oh I do
and I keep watching you :D
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Brewman_Jax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:36 AM
Response to Reply #53
54. Watchers watching watchers
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:37 AM
Response to Reply #54
55. LOL
I seem not to be able not to flirt with you. I hope you don't minde :)
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Brewman_Jax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:46 AM
Response to Reply #55
56. Of course not


:hug:
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:55 AM
Response to Reply #56
57. Phew
:hug:

:hi:

How is everything on your side of the Atlantic?
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Brewman_Jax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 09:57 AM
Response to Reply #57
58. Stable
dad is getting physical therapy and is improving, and I'm ready for winter to end.
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MissHoneychurch Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 10:04 AM
Response to Reply #58
59. Me too
I mean I am ready for the winter to end. The sun is already having more power already and it is nice to feel it.
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u4ic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Mar-23-06 01:28 PM
Response to Original message
61. Sorry, MissHoneychurch
I'm in that club, too. :hug:

I wish people could just be up front if they're not interested in a relationship...just a bit of fun.

Some people just get their kicks off knowing you're interested; some just run.

Sometimes we do it to ourselves (I know I have); when the expectations on my part exceed the reality of the situation.

I could never be like them, though. Whether they be the lions in love, or in business, or friendship...I could never go down to their level. And quite frankly, it's their lost opportunity, not mine. :D
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In_The_Wind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-24-06 08:09 AM
Response to Reply #61
63. u4ic
:yourock: :loveya:
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