Those hilarious colonoscopies!

[Oeditpus Rex]

A physician claimed that the following are actual comments made by his patients (predominately male) while he was performing their colonoscopies:

1. "Take it easy, Doc. You're boldly going where no man has gone before!"

2. "Find Amelia Earhart yet?"

3. "Can you hear me NOW?"

4. "Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Are we there yet?"

5. "You know, in Arkansas, we're now legally married."

6. "Any sign of the trapped miners, Chief?"

7. "You put your left hand in, you take your left hand out..."

8. "Hey! Now I know how a Muppet feels!"

9. "If your hand doesn't fit, you must quit!"

10. "Hey Doc, let me know if you find my dignity."

11. "You used to be an executive at Enron, didn't you?"

12. "God, now I know why I'm not gay."



And the best one of all...



13. "Could you write a note for my wife saying that my head isn't up there?"

:rofl:

[Arkham House]

1. Hmmm...how about:

"no, no--my brain in my HEAD..."

[Oeditpus Rex]

4. Yeah, that's just when you wanna hear

"It will have to come out!"

:rofl:

[Deja Q]

5. Or, worse, says the doctor,

"Whoopie! I found the buried treasure!"

:spray:

[Deja Q]

2. You do realize that the doctor shoving the tube up there should not at all

be distracted? One hearty laugh and the camera would be taking pictures of a lot more than being bargained for... and it'd hurt somethin' awful...

Still, as to the quotes:

:spray: :rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl::rofl:

[darkstar]

3. Prior to my colonoscopy I had a digital exam>

So I say to my Doc, "Where's the computer?"

Thanks. I'll be here all week. Remember to tip yr waitresses...

[DBoon]

6. I was seriously sedated for this one

I doubt I could have said anything more than "huhhh whaaa"