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What's the worst local television commercial you've ever seen?

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Kraklen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:26 PM
Original message
What's the worst local television commercial you've ever seen?
I don't live near Vancouver any more but there used to be (still is?) this guy called The Captain. The Captain looks a bit like Skipper from Gilligan's Island, only fatter and uglier. He owns a pawn shop and apparently filmed his own commercials using the cameras and mikes from his own store. Usually he had the decency to wear a little sailor's hate and a shirt. One time he "dressed" like a sumo wrestler and did the commercial in a horrible "japanese" accent. Now, sumo wrestlers aren't exactly eye candy, but this guy made them by comparison. He had really bad body hair which had all gone gray and did absolutely NOTHING to cover his moobs. I think he was wearing some kind of thong, but: 1. I didn't look that close, and 2. his gut hung down to his thighs.

It was almost a so-bad-it's-good commercial.

Most of them are just bad. There's these two local businesses, a chinese restaurant and a furniture store, that have been working a matrix theme for the last few years. I sure wish they'd move on.

How are things in your neck of the woods?
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Adenoid_Hynkel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:31 PM
Response to Original message
1. dunno, but the worst radio commercial is toni roberts for las vegas
toni:
'c'mon las vegas is calling!"

me:
"ARGH! MY EARS! high....pitched...whine....destroying...hearing"

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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:31 PM
Response to Original message
2. Not a television comercial but a radio commercial
Actually, a SERIES of commercials. And they get played EVERYWHERE on the radio.

There's this chain of mattress stores in Los Angeles/Orange/Riverside counties called "Sit N Sleep". They have two guys on their commercials who sound WAY more enthusiastic than they probably should, the dialogue sounds like it was written by a three year old, and all of their commercials end with "We'll beat anyone's advertised price or your mattress is FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!" (note that when they say "free" that way, picture a guy saying that after he recieves a massive wedgie).

Every time I hear that commercial I feel like this: :puke: :puke: :puke:
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Kathleen04 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #2
7. I've experienced the Sit N' Sleep commercials
There's actually a TV commercial that goes with it, he falls back onto a mattress when he says "FREEEEEEE!"
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:34 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. They have TV commercials now?
:banghead: :banghead: :banghead: :banghead:
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Kathleen04 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:37 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. Afraid so
Thank god for TiVo. ;)
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. Maybe it's a requirement for mattress stores to have bad commercials
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trackfan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 11:20 PM
Response to Reply #2
37. You're killing me, Larry..... n/t
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Democracy White Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:31 PM
Response to Original message
3. All the damn local car commercials
and furniture outlets are just horrible...

I also hate the Sleep Doctor commercials, ugh, just stupid as hell.

Dee
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Initech Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #3
13. car commercials suck too
Edited on Wed Aug-03-05 06:38 PM by EOO
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Kathleen04 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:32 PM
Response to Original message
4. We're wacking car prices
left and right. Wack! Come down to Joe Schmoe's auto, get in your car and wack it! :evilgrin:


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vptpt Donating Member (534 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:32 PM
Response to Original message
5. Allied Discount Tires
Tires ain't pretty! I saw that one all the time growing up in Central Florida. I don't remember the details, just a guy yelling "Alliiiiied Discount Tiiiiiiire!"
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TheCentepedeShoes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:42 PM
Response to Reply #5
19. I remember that one !
When I lived in Tampa. I think that guy was just some "actor" hired for the commercial, maybe a friend of the owner, didn't have anything to do with the tire company itself. Did you ever see that guy from Tire Kingdom? Crowns and Superman cape? Jeeze, how lame.
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lumberingbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 07:21 PM
Response to Reply #5
25. If I remember right...
he was the guy who owned Behr's Shoe Store in Orlando. He did the commercial for Allied Tire as a favor. (Behr's Shoes had a sign that said they could "fit any human being" and displayed a shoe Shaquille O'Neal wore when he played for the Orlando Magic. The store closed several years ago.) The guy did the voice-over for a Sub shop after that.
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:33 PM
Response to Original message
6. Years ago
There was a guy named Cal Worthington who sold used cars. The voice over would say "Here's Cal Worthington and his dog spot!"...only it was never a dog. It was a bear, a tiger, whatever animal he could afford that day. It would end with a wretched little song that repeatedly told you to "go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal!"
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Kraklen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:36 PM
Response to Reply #6
11. I remember Cal.
He used to work in the Seattle area before moving down south.

There was another guy in Seattle, Jack Robinson? He used to wear a red shirt with suspenders. He'd shout "I won't be undersold" then beat the shit out of a washing machine with a sledge hammer. I think he died of a massive heart attack.
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Not_Giving_Up Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:41 PM
Response to Reply #11
18. I had no idea he was a traveller
There was also a dealership who had "Don't you BUY no ugly truck" as a slogan. :wtf:
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:38 PM
Response to Reply #11
32. actually cal moved north from CA
And Jack Roberts put us all out of our misery by slipping the surly bonds of earth a few years ago.
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kwassa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:21 PM
Response to Reply #6
28. Cal Worthington and his Dog, Spot!
loved those ads.
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trackfan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 11:24 PM
Response to Reply #6
38. This is off the top of my head:
If you wanna get a better set of wheels
I will stand upon my head to make a deal
I will stand upon my head
till my ears are turning red
Go see Cal, go see Cal, go see Cal.

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Tripper11 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:34 PM
Response to Original message
9. I remember the Captain!!!
He used to drive around Vancouver in this little station wagon with a huge flag flying form it all painted up!

I think the past few years he lost a ton of weight...but yeah, I remember those obnoxious commercials.
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Aristus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:36 PM
Response to Original message
10. Anything by Ivar Hagglund.
Ivar was the founder and owner of 'Acres of Clams', a Seattle seafood restaurant, and a chain of fast food joints. He was apparantly a great philanthropist and did some wonderful things for Seattle, but his commercials bit the big baloney!

He starred in most of them before he died. He would read the copy off the cue cards so clumsily and ineptly, eyes moving the whole time, that it was actually sort of endearing. He would also occasionally play his guitar and sing a song that would actually get you up to go eat at his place just to get him to stop!

Ivar Hagglund, R.I.P.
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Kraklen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:38 PM
Response to Reply #10
14. Those were high quality commercials. Serious.


There were these guys in clam suits running around a race track and as they'd approach the camera they'd be saying IIIIIIIIIIII then as they'd pass: vvvvaaaarrrrrsssss!
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Aristus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:40 PM
Response to Reply #14
16. Okay, the "I WON'T BE UNDERSOLD" appliance guy was
probably worse. He was just craptastic.
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Cocoa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:40 PM
Response to Original message
17. Eagle Auto Insurance
bimbos hold giant eagle eggs to their chests and say look at these! I guess the eggs have their low rates on them or something like that.
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shawmut Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:45 PM
Response to Reply #17
34. Yes and here it is:
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Cocoa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 11:10 PM
Response to Reply #34
36. that's some fine acting
those ladies are headed for greatness. :toast:
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Tripper11 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:47 PM
Response to Original message
20. OH yeah....here in Seattle we have Vern Fonk
Honk when you drive by Vern Fonk (Insurance sales)


See the vids here!
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Kraklen Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:48 PM
Response to Reply #20
21. I've heard those on the radio driving through.
Weird stuff.
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TheCentepedeShoes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:52 PM
Response to Original message
22. Art Grindle
Used cars. Saw him on TV in Dallas and Houston in the 60's and Tampa in the 70's. Second place - came on just now. Adult bev place called Party Stop - guy get a pie in the face. "Now that's funny," he says (NOT!)
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lpbk2713 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:45 PM
Response to Reply #22
33. I wanta sell you a car!



I remember Art Grindle.
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HEyHEY Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 06:55 PM
Response to Original message
23. ANYTHING out of New BRunswick
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PinkTiger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 07:00 PM
Response to Original message
24. The new Sonic commercials.
They are creepy, especially the one with the wife and husband and the sweater, "Did your body tell you to wear that sweater?"

Ewwwwwwwww.

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IntravenousDemilo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:13 PM
Response to Original message
26. Detroit's CBS affiliate used to run a spot that made my gorge rise.
"Bill Goodman's Gun and Knife Show" would run during late-night showings of Naked City. There was this hillbilly-soundinif g announcer who would list all the fun weapons you could get there, including, if I remember right, assault weapons. And it would end with this insane banjo-picking and the chorus "Bill Goodman's Gun and Knife Show / Call a buddy, bring a friend".

Yeah, as if I would want anyone who frequents these places as a friend! I live in a country with gun control, and I think the damned things should be banned altogether. Obviously some would disagree. These commercials were one of my first glimpses into a backward culture.
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WilmywoodNCparalegal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:17 PM
Response to Original message
27. Toyota of Durham (NC)... aarrrghhh
ack! and the dumb cohort... what was his name? Donald...

Now it's Mark Jacobson Toyota, but still the same annoying commercials.

And here in NYC I can't stand the Empire carpets commercial and the NY lottery commercial.

I also despise all the lawyer (a.k.a. ambulance chasers) commercials that run especially in the morning (Injured? Then call Dewey Cheatum & Howe)
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havocmom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:26 PM
Response to Original message
29. Any of them with 'livin large Bob' and his male enhancements
x(
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kwassa Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:26 PM
Response to Original message
30. Who would have thought we could afford a piano, of our own?
this tune is definite earworm material. A piano store in Los Angeles.
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miss_kitty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:34 PM
Response to Original message
31. Any ads where the business owners use their no talent kids to
shill for a product that doesn't really cater to kids. Local car dealerships, Abbey Carpets (those girls' mom must think they're the next Gumm Sisters with the 3 part harmony "You'll love Abbey Car-pets!").

And the former Oak Barn with the kids jumping and yelling in unison "...We'll save you MONEY!" after the spokesmodel guy says "At the Oak Barn..." The Oak Barn going out of business was a just punishment for that travesty.
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bertha katzenengel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-03-05 08:54 PM
Response to Original message
35. Maryland lottery. The talking crabs are RED.
It's a very small state.
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Strawman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:30 AM
Response to Original message
39. Watts Club Mozambique commercials on the Old Channel 62 in Detroit
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 08:33 AM by Strawman
It was a TV commercial for a strip joint. I don't think I've ever seen a strip joint commercial anywhere else on TV. My sister and I used to love to watch The New Dance Show and somewhere we have a couple episodes recorded. On one of the tapes there is this commerical for Watts Club with an announcer pushing his voice (that sounded like a mix between Barry White and Dr. Claw from Inspector Gadget) listing off the names of the dancers as they approach the camera "seductively": "Good & Plenty, Taboo, What Dreams are Made Of, Too Legit to Quit, Zsa Zsa..."

It is in the "so bad, it's great" category. It's priceless really.

I miss the old channel 62. It was a people's station, not some soulless corporate affiliate.
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youspeakmylanguage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:46 AM
Response to Original message
40. A Charlotte, NC classic...
Edited on Thu Aug-04-05 08:51 AM by youspeakmylanguage
Who: Bill Elliot, NASCAR legend

What: Harrelson Ford local commercial

When: Early 80's, possibly late 70's - back when NASCAR was still lowbrow enough that drivers would appear in local Charlotte commercials.

Where: A sports bar somewhere around Charlotte, NC. A crowd of well wishers and handful of pro athletes discuss the incredible prices and service at Harrelson Ford.

Why: The redneck quote to end all redneck quotes...

"That's AWESOME, BILL!"



...which of course leads to the greatest redneck nickname of all time:

"Awesome Bill from Dawsonville!"



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Saphire Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Aug-04-05 08:55 AM
Response to Original message
41. Gallary Furniture Saves...You...Money.
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