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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 12:55 AM
Original message
Shit
I just got done talking to a friend of mine. He is $2400 behind on child support and they are going to take him to jail if he doesn't come up with $400 soon. He is having a hard time getting work and he is currently living with his parents. He doesn't own anything except for his computer and clothes. His parents bought him the computer. The most work he's been able to find is tree trimming part time and it doesn't pay worth a shit and isn't consistent. I've got the money to help him, but he doesn't want to take it from me. I'm trying to talk him into it. What do you think I should do? Anything? I'd hate to see him go to jail. We've been friends for 17 years, since we were kids.
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NoSheep Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 12:56 AM
Response to Original message
1. Try to help him over the long term to secure better employment.
Edited on Wed Jun-15-05 12:56 AM by NoSheep
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:00 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. I keep trying to get him to go into trucking like I did
Trucking jobs are plentiful if you are qualified and it's pretty easy to get qualified. He doesn't want to be away from his little girl, though. He would probably have to drive over the road for at least a year and that would mean being gone for long periods of time.
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LastKnight Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:08 AM
Response to Reply #3
5. what about short distance stuff?
i have a friend that does trucking runs and never leaves his home city... just like a fedex or ups or something on a local delivery route. see if you can pursaude him to look into trucking for that reason. its not the same kind, granted but still theres usuially a decent ammount of openings and can usuially avoid alot of out of town runs as far as ive heard. but that depends on the company im sure.

i donno, i suppose worst comes to worst you could leave him the money in an unmarked envelope in his mailbox, wont know who its from.

whatever happens, best of luck

-LK
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:14 AM
Response to Reply #5
7. It's hard to get on at fedex and ups around here
I've tried and I can't get on and I have 8.5 years safe driving experience in a rig. All the short haul trucking companies around here want at least a year experience before they put you in a truck. Those jobs are highly desireable because a lot of people grow tired of being out on the road all the time.
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Floogeldy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:00 AM
Response to Original message
2. He needed a lawyer a year ago.
Tell him.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:01 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. I will mention it to him
I hadn't thought about that.
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:13 AM
Response to Original message
6. Can you hire him to do some tree trimming for you and give him the $400?
Or can you pass the money to your mom/anyone you know to have him tree trim?

Or perhaps something else he could do for you, so he'd feel like he was earning it, if that's the problem?

I'm like him, I don't like to take money from people. But maybe he will when he's down to the wire.

You're a good friend.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:16 AM
Response to Reply #6
9. That's a great idea
I have a lot of landscaping work that I need done around my house. I will run it by him. That might work. Thanks.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:16 AM
Response to Original message
8. Trucking sounds like the best option to me; after all, he'd still be able
to see his little girl, and he wouldn't be able to see her if he were in jail...You might point that little fact out to him as well...

Good luck Droopy. You are a very good man, and he is lucky to have you as a friend. Please keep us posted, OK?

BTW, did you get to the doctor? Are you OK? Forgive me for thread-jacking your own thread!

:pals:
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:21 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. Hi Peggy
Thanks for the idea. I will tell him about that little paradox.

I'm doing fine. I contacted the doctor and he said it was just muscle spasms which I guess is distinct from tardive dyskinesia. He said it is a common side affect from the medication that I'm on. He wants to prescribe me another med, but I don't know about that. I think it's a muscle relaxer and I don't want to be on anything that might bring me down. I will get the prescription and see how it goes, but I may just save it if an when things get worse.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:26 AM
Response to Reply #10
11. You are such a good person, Droopy!
I always know that when I post in your thread, you will answer. It is very nice to see that "1 reply" by my post! Of course, it doesn't go on indefinitely, but still...

You could ask your pharmacist about the new med, if you have a pharmacist, that is. They can often give you more info than your doctor can/will...Please take care of yourself. You matter to me, and to a lot of people here on DU, not to mention in your RL!

:pals:
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:33 AM
Response to Reply #11
12. Thank you
I will definitely have a few questions for the pharmacist tomorrow.

You are always so positive and upbeat. You matter to me, too.
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CaliforniaPeggy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:39 AM
Response to Reply #12
13. Hey Droopy!
Loveya!:loveya:
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:39 AM
Response to Original message
14. Droopy.
I'm with Floog on this one. The $400 might be better spent on an attorney for your friend. If child support in your friend's state is linked to income, isn't it possible that a good attorney could get the proceedings against your friend continued until he's had a chance to ask for a reduction in monthly payments, based on his lack of employment/income?

I also agree with Peggy. You're a good person.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:44 AM
Response to Reply #14
15. I think you are right
Maybe I should hire the guy an attorney. I think child support is based on income. Thing is (and I hope this doesn't sound bad) his ex has since remarried and she and him are now in a top tax bracket as a result. They don't need the money. But I guess I would probably want him to pay something as a matter of principle if I were in their shoes.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:49 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. It's possible . . .
that a good attorney could get the process slowed down a bit so that the guy doesn't go to jail for non-support. Nobody can pay child support from jail.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:52 AM
Response to Reply #16
18. I will check into that option tomorrow
I can handle the $400, but I don't know the going rate for lawyers in child support cases. We will see.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:54 AM
Response to Reply #18
20. I be the $400 would be accepted as a retainer.
Thanks for trying to help a friend who probably doesn't have anywhere else to turn, Droopy. :hug:
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Robeson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:50 AM
Response to Original message
17. He needs an attorney to help work out payment arrangements.
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Droopy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jun-15-05 01:54 AM
Response to Reply #17
19. Looks like that's the way to go
based on what I've seen here. He has tried to make payment arrangements of $50 a week, but they didn't go for it. Maybe if he's got the power of a judgement on his side that will be a workable solution.
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