Kilgore Trout Rules .....

[Trajan]

He wrote a book, you know, 'Venus On The Half Shell' ...

"We are healthy only to the extent that our ideas are humane"
- Kilgore Trout

[rfranklin]

1. He didn't write "Trout Fishing in America?"

That was a good book.

[Wickerman]

8. I thought that was Charlie Shedd

:evilgrin:

[benburch]

2. You realize...

That was really Phillipe Jose Farmer, Right?

[dbonds]

3. I thought it was Kurt Vonegut.

Kilgor Trout was a fictional writer in many of his books. He then had the character write a RL book.

[Trajan]

5. You guys are NO fun ! ....

This is the lounge, damnit ! .....

The Dancing Fool

A flying saucer creature named Zog arrived on Earth to explain how wars could be prevented and how cancer could be cured. He brought the information from Margo, a planet where the natives conversed by means of farts and tap dancing.
Zog landed at night in Connectitut. He had no sooner touched down than he saw a house on fire. He rushed into the house, farting and tap dancing, warning the people about the terrible danger they were in. The head of the house brained Zog with a golf club.

[Bok_Tukalo]

7. My shameless theft

[Trajan]

10. LMFAO ....

Great theft ... and hilarious to boot ! ...

[dbonds]

9. Well, I am partly rigth.

Kilgore Trout was a character in Vonnegut's books. But it was Phillip Jose' Farmer that wrote Venus on the Half-Shell.

Didn't mean to step on your fun. Forget all that <puts on sunglasses, look at the silver cigar thing, bright flash of light> Now we were talking about Kilgore's great writing styles...

[Trajan]

11. You are fabulously right ....

But still: Kilgore Trout lives and breathes, or my name is not Dwayne Hoobler .....

Hail to the Chief

Trout couldn't tell one politician from another one. They were all formlessly enthusiastic chimpanzees to him. He wrote a story one time about an optimistic chimpanzee who became President of the United States. He called it "Hail to the Chief."

The chimpanzee wore little blue blazer with brass buttons, and with the seal of the President of the United States sewed to the breast pocket.

Everywhere he went, bands would play "Hail to the Chief." The chimpanzee loved it. He would bounce up and down.

-strangely prescient-

[Spinzonner]

12. If it was Texas, they would have made him governor

[Trajan]

13. pResident Zog ....

In a way, Bush IS Zog, farting his policies and tap dancing around the truth ....

(Psssst: ZOG is ONLY a character in a book, NOT an evil fascist and specifically ethnic organization)

[Trajan]

4. Shhhhhh damnit ....

Now It Can Be Told

The premise of the book was this: Life was an experiment by the Creator of the Universe, Who wanted to test a new sort of creature He was thinking of introducing into the Universe. It was a creature with the ability to make up its own mind. All the other creatures were fully programmed robots.
The book was in the form of a long letter from The Creator of the Universe to the experimental creature. The Creator congratulated the creature and apologized for all the discomfort he had endured. The Creator invited him to a banquet in his honor in the Empire Room of the Waldorf Astoria Hotel in New York City, where a black robot named Sammy Davis, Jr., would sing and dance.
And the experimental creature wasn't killed after the banquet. He was transferred to a virgin planet instead. Living cells were sliced from the palms of his hands, while he was unconscious. The operation didn't hurt at all.
And then the cells were stirred into a soupy sea on the virgin planet. They would evolve into ever more complicated life forms as the eons went by. Whatever shapes they assumed, they would have free will.

-snip-

.... and so it goes ....

[Trajan]

6. Kilgore Trout again ....

Chicken Soup

wrote a novel about an Earthling named Delmore Skag, a bachelor in the neighborhood where everybody else had enormous families. And Skag was a scientist, and he found a way to reproduce himself in chicken soup. He would shave living cells from the palm of his right hand, mix them with the soup, and expose the soup to cosmic rays. The cells turned into babies which looked exactly like Delmore Skag.

Pretty soon, Delmore was having several babies a day, and inviting his neighbors to share his pride and happiness. He had mass baptisms of as many as a hundred babies at a time. He became famous as a family man.

And so on.

Skag hoped to force his country into making laws against excessively large families, but the legislatures and the courts declined to meet the problem head-on. They passed stern laws instead against the possession by unmarried persons of chicken soup.

[Trajan]

14. PROOF that Kilgore Trout wrote this book ! ....

I wouldnt lie to ya's ! ....

The dog ? ..... Anubis ....

[JitterbugPerfume]

15. everybody knows

that you can buy his bookd in any porno shop