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What advantages are there of looking like a teenager?

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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 11:50 AM
Original message
What advantages are there of looking like a teenager?
I am 27 and was complaining to a male coworker that I get offended when I am carded for under 18 stuff. He said that I should take it as a compliment because most women want to look younger. I am alright with looking a little younger, but I don't like being mistaken as someone who is underage. To me, that says that I look naive, weak, and vulnerable. Last year, I advance to the final round of a multistep job interview for a higher profile position and they said that my youthful appearance was one of the main reasons that they didn't hire me. I might want to look younger than I am when I get older, but really if I could look one age for the rest of my life, it probably would be in my mid to late twenties, not my upper teens.
My male coworker said that there are advantages, even at my age to looking younger. What is he talking about? I have no interest in being a prostitute or stripper. I am married, but even if I wasn't would I really want to date someone who thought that someone in their mid to late twenties was too old? Am I missing something?
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asthmaticeog Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 11:57 AM
Response to Original message
1. I looked like a kid until I hit 30.
Then, suddenly, miraculously, I looked 30. There WAS a whole lot of annoying I.D. card fishing, and some frustrating instances of being taken nonseriously, but I'd assume I got less of that than you, since I'm a man. I saw no advantages to looking younger than my age until I started greying at the temples.
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mordarlar Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:01 PM
Response to Original message
2. I am 32 and still get carded for under 18 stuff. DETEST IT.
Edited on Sat Mar-19-05 12:04 PM by mordarlar
I have earned EVERY SECOND. LOL

Edited to add. They even card me when my 12 yr old daughter is standing there calling me mom. One woman went so far, as to ask my daughter, is that REALLY your mom.

Also was mistaken from a distance as AN 8TH grader at the middle school last yr. Got yelled at for using the faculty rest room. When i clarified i was a parent, i got OMG i am soo sorry, but you look like a kid. My kid was humiliated. ROFL.

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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:56 PM
Response to Reply #2
15. I don't think anyone has mistaken me for a middle schooler
I am sorry.
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Straight Shooter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:01 PM
Response to Original message
3. Time flies. You'll get your wish to look older before you realize it.
I was a court reporter years ago before computer-aided transcription, and would carry my equipment in two "suitcase" type of carriers. One day my car broke down, so there I am on the side of the road, trying to get a ride, wearing my suit and holding my little "suitcases."

A guy comes by, looks me over and says, "What's wrong?" I said, "I need to get to my job." He looks me over again with a wary eye and says, "You're not running away from home, are you?"

Bwhahahahaha.

I was 24.
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steve2470 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:11 PM
Response to Reply #3
7. LOLOLOLOL that is freeaking hilarious !!!
I love it ! I have NEVER had this problem.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:10 PM
Response to Reply #7
17. My mother...
was shopping for ladies' underthings at a department store. The snooty saleslady told her the training bras and junior clothes were on another floor.

My mother was the 25-year-old mother of two children.
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:08 PM
Response to Original message
4. Why get offended?
Edited on Sat Mar-19-05 12:08 PM by skygazer
I can understand you not wanting to look like a teenager but if you look young, there's no reason to get offended when you're carded. Really, you ought to be happy that store clerks and bartenders are doing what they're supposed to do to keep underage people from buying booze and cigs. They don't know you or how old you are - they just have to go by looks.

However, I do understand your puzzlement with your co workers comments. I have no idea why it would be an advantage to look younger than 27. :wtf:

edited for appalling punctuation error
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steve2470 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:08 PM
Response to Original message
5. if you like being irresponsible, you could probably get away with tons of
irresponsible behavior lol
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Maine-ah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:10 PM
Response to Original message
6. I know what you mean
I'm thirty and people have guessed my age at 17!! It took me a little while to get over it, but now, I enjoy it, and hope I can hang on to it. I do know one thing though, there are a lot of dirty old men out there.....I say enjoy it while you got it. I still get carded, people are surprised to see my age.
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mongo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:21 PM
Response to Original message
8. Forgive me if I card you
I card tons of people who I am 90% sure are over 18 - it is a FELONY of I let someone in my back room with the adult products. I will card anyone that I don't recognize who looks under 30.

If I have my doubts that you are actually under 18 even when you show me an ID that looks real and looks like you, I will card you EVERY time you come in to the store. If I let you back with a fake ID, that is an affirmative defense. And believe me, there are forces out there who would like me to fuck up. So, even if I carded you with your fake ID 50 times - the one time I let you back there without an ID I can get up to a year in jail!


So please don't be offended. We clerks are only trying to cover our collective asses.


I'm not trying to hassle people, and I've had quite a few people get mad at me when they did not have their ID
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tjwmason Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:42 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. I can understand your perspective
I've never actually been asked for I.D.; the main requirement over here is buying alcohol, I bought it aged 16 with no problems at all (legal age 18). My sister bought cigarettes from about 13 (legal age 16) without trouble. In fact one of the most popular places for I.D. is public transport where children prove that they are under 16 and qualify for a cheaper fare. I never even bothered with fake I.D.

In the U.K. most people don't carry I.D., we just don't need it. Age limits are (as I said) generally very relaxed (though I don't know about your specific industry); and there is no legal requirement to carry a driver's licence (you have to be able to present it within 3 days). This does make the odd occasion that somebody wants proof of age more inconvient; but as you say, it's just covering his own back.
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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:52 PM
Response to Reply #8
12. I guess that I can understand that
Thanks for your perspective.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:12 PM
Response to Reply #8
18. I have never, ever, ever gotten angry
when I have been carded. At my age, it's a blessing.

I do remember being carded for cigarettes (age to purchase was 18) the night before I turned 30. I have since quit smoking, so perhaps I can retain that youthful look. ;)
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steve2470 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:28 PM
Response to Original message
9. Despite my earlier attempt at humor, I do feel bad for you. That sucks nt
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sbj405 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:44 PM
Response to Original message
11. I'm almost 29 and I was recently asked "Oh is this your first job?"
Very frustrating. I work in a male dominated field, so being young looking and a female is a double whammy.

I can't really think of any advantages of looking younger other than the vanity aspect. My bf is 2 years younger, but is usually mistaken for 10 years older than he is (I think it's the beard), so people must really think he's robbing the cradle. :-)
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Nikia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:02 PM
Response to Reply #11
16. In employment, there is the being taken seriously aspect
I think that is what they were getting at when they said that they weren't hiring me because I looked too young. The position was in a male dominated industry. Although more women are entering and advancing in the industry, this particuliar plant was all male at the managerial level (aside from the human resources person). Many men don't take women as seriously as other men, especially when they aren't used to working with us. Being a young woman is even worse.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:13 PM
Response to Reply #16
19. On that, I can sympathize.
At my first "real" job, I actually was quite young. I was also very good at what I did, and it was extremely frustrating not to be taken seriously or to be given the "aren't you cute" attitude.
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Mr.Green93 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:52 PM
Response to Original message
13. You would be popular
in jail.
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barackmyworld Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 12:55 PM
Response to Original message
14. I got carded to sit in an airplane exit row (I'm 19)
Edited on Sat Mar-19-05 12:55 PM by barackmyworld
I asked if they could move me and my bf to the exit row...they had to make sure we were 15. Now THAT'S bad.
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Mabus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:15 PM
Response to Original message
20. You won't believe how many times I still have to show ID
and I'm in my 40's. A lot of people think I'm in my 20's, early 20's. It only took four months for the local convenience store to quit carding me for smokes. Yes, it can be a pain in the butt but I wouldn't change it for the world. Believe it or not, when I go places (like the auto store or county offices) people tend to explain things more because they figure I don't know what I'm doing. For instance, I went to the county courthouse to get some information on some property for a local environmental group tracking possible development in the area. I've been doing this for our group for years. Every time I go in the people behind the counter assume I know nothing because I look so young and are more forthcoming about how things work and what I should be looking for. And for some strange reason they like to get gossipy with me about what they see going on. It is like they look at me as someone who isn't a threat. The downside? I'm usually the one that has to go in because they are nicer to me than my colleagues.

What are the advantages? You can interact in two different worlds because younger people don't see you as old and older people (initially) are attracted to me because they see me as someone who is engaged and seems to know more than I should at my age. They are always surprised I'm as old as I am. It is a little condescending but "older" people like to take me under their wing.

I can also slip into the student section at basketball games (closer to the court) and not get dirty looks from the students.

I've also used it to my advantage back when I practiced law. I found it was a real help to look young especially when I worked with juvenile clients (which is the area that I did the majority of my work). They didn't see me as an old geezer who wouldn't understand what they were going through. Instead, they saw me as someone who wasn't that much older than they were and it helped create a bond that enabled me to represent them better. They were just more comfortable with someone they could identify with than someone who looked like they could be their parents.

It also helps because people underestimate me in terms of my experience and maturity. A lot of people look at me and see a young 20-something. You just need to learn to use it to your advantage.

I went to back to college when I was in my early 30's. I was sitting in a history class when the current topic was Nixon & Watergate. During the discussion I happened to mention that I was impressed about the peaceful turnover in government when Nixon resigned. I reminisced that there was no rioting in the streets or subsequent coup attempts like there were in other countries when there was political turmoil. When I finished I realized there were some very surprised looks from my classmates. If I had looked like I was in my 30's at the time I would have been that older student all semester long that no one talks to. Instead, after that day I got really popular because everyone wanted me as their study buddy.

Lastly, there are a lot of really hot guys that I got to date because I look younger than I am. I always told them how I old I really was before I went out with them and every single one of them was okay with it. It was that allure of being an older woman but not looking like one. Admittedly I finally decided there was something about a contemporary (my husband turns 50 next week) that I needed in my relationships but, damn, being a young looking 30-something in college was great.
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WinterStorm Donating Member (790 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Mar-19-05 01:19 PM
Response to Original message
21. The bouncer at the bar
was young enough to be my kid and he carded me.
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