Question for people who recently became dads.

[Squatch]

Hey, all...

So, we are just a couple weeks away from having our first baby and I'm starting to shift into panic mode.

My wife has been reading all these books on pregnancy, breast feeding, etc. Seeing as how I can't do either of those things, there's only so much I can read about being a parent from the mother's point of view.

Do you all know of a website or a book that covers what a dad should do before, during, and after the delivery from a dad's perspective?

I certainly appreciate the help!

S

[AverageJoe]

1. I've got a two year old

The best thing you can do is support your wife in everything she wants or needs. Make sure you get up at night with the baby as much as you can. Change your share of the diapers. Fix meals. Be present and be prepared for constant exhaustion and constant challenge.

Be prepared, also, for the best time of your life.

Congratulations!

[Telly Savalas]

4. Ditto.

If your wife is breast-feeding, then for all practical purposes the baby will be attached to her a large percentage of the time. In these circumstances, the conventional wisdom for postnatal roles is: "Mommy takes care of the baby, Daddy takes care of Mommy, and hopefully someone else is there to take care of both of them." For the first few weeks, life with the kid is very challenging, but it's straightforward. All the baby will do is eat, sleep, cry, and poop. You and the wife just focus on meeting these constant demands and adjust to the fact there's a strange little person who's come to live with you. After that things start getting more complicated, and more fun.

A good book to get a perspective and ideas on caregiving for a young'un is Your Baby and Child by Penelope Leach. It's a nice overview of what to expect from your munchkin and has useful tips and pointers. It's not aimed at Dad's in particular, but just at caregivers of a child. But even if you've got a Ward and June Cleaver arrangement going on, it's still extremely useful: both for the time you spend with the kid and to get a better picture on what your wife is dealing with all day.

Congrats, man. Don't freak out either. You'll do fine.

[NewJeffCT]

2. My daughter just turned 2

So, I would say be prepared for tiredness. Make sure you have a lot of patience, as you'll both often be very tired and it is easier to lose your temper when you're tired. So, make sure to cut each other some slack over the next several months...

Just be supportive overall, too.

[trof]

3. One thing Miz t. appreciated when she was breast feeding:

She'd poke me for the 2 a.m. (or whatever it was) feeding.
I'd go get our baby girl and bring her in.
Miz t. would wake up just enough to feed her and poke me again when she was through.
I take her back to the crib.
I'd get a little snooze while the feeding was going on and Miz t. wouldn't get fully, all-synapses-firing, awake and could get right back to sleep.
We both got more nighttime rest.

If I had it all to do over again I'd probably change more diapers.

BTW, our daughter breast fed for about 10 months and transitioned from the breast to a Tommy-Tippy type mug. Never had a bottle.