Can somebody tell me one of those good positive affirmation to use?

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

In one of those situations when you want to act like a dignified, positive, practical adult, but you feel like a quivering five-year old inside? What do you say to yourself?

And don't nobody say - "I'm good enough, I'm strong enough...and darn it, people like me!"

I need a real one!

[soupkitchen]

1. Not to pry, but if you could be more specific we could more specific.

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

4. Well, let's say that there are these

difficult, complex people that I have never gotten along with, being totally opposite in many ways from them. I am sort of like them, though, because they brought me to the earth because the Catholic church told them to have lots of kids.

These very difficult people were always masters at putting people down and scapegoating and destructive behavior and I believed they tried to steal my mind through fundamentalism and mind control, and worse. However, they are also genuinely charming and I also missed them and felt guilty and now forgive them.

I love and hate them and they feel the same way about me. Now I am going to see them for the first time in an long time and, it sounds crazy, but inside I am still scared to death of them.

[Bruce McAuley]

10. A little different story if they're parents..

You are stuck with them for the rest of their lives, like it or not. The best you can do is forgive them, learn the good points and avoid the bad points, and stay far away if they are still too dogmatic.
Concentrate on the good, forgive the bad, and have a good time as much as possible.

Bruce

[soupkitchen]

11. If I truly forgive them they can never hurt me again.

They did their best and now I have to do my best to forgive them and move on.

[philosophie_en_rose]

2. I have survived this.

I can survive anything.

[Bruce McAuley]

3. Be happy.

Works for me, and causes less ulcers and a tendency to look for the silver lining in every situation.
Waste of time to be unhappy, and not productive in ANY situation.
If YOU are happy, or at least trying, others will catch the positive emotion and start to feel happier too.


Bruce

[booksenkatz]

5. This is kind of a depressing one

but it got me through today's traffic nightmare.

"In a hundred years, this won't matter a damn."

It calmed me down instantly, which my 4-year-old son greatly appreciated. I can't stand being late and being tied up in traffic!

[shirlden]

6. Are you saying that you have

a confrontation of some sort coming up? In situations where I feel a bit uneasy or threatened I always picture my audience in their underwear. That does wonders for my dignity and self assurance.

Good luck !!!

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

13. I have to laugh at this one! Obviously you wrote it before I gave the

description of the situation since this is the ONE situation where a person would not want to picture the other people in their underwear!

[Nevernose]

7. F*ck It

I know it sounds stupid, but whenever things aren't going my way, or I have to do something that scares the hell out of me (like giving some kind of public presentation):

I shrug my shoulders, and say "fuck it."

And this little mantra works real well for me. It's like magic...SHAZAM! I call it living the "fuck it" lifestyle.

[KCDem]

8. No one can make me feel bad about myself

if I don't let them.

Good luck with the reunion! Let us know how it goes!

[rainy]

9. My favorite is: they're just people

Or try: be here now.
There is no anxiety in the present, only in the past or future thinking.

[ThreeCatNight]

12. Whatever does not kill you....

just puts off the inevitable.

[VelmaD]

14. some serious ones and a not so serious one

When I need a little perspective I tell myself this "This is not about me -- this does not affect who I am". When other people act like immature assholes it is about them - not you. Another good one to remind yourself is "I cannot control their behavior, only mine". That one always encourages me to act like a grown-up.

Now the funny one. Someone once sent me a list of Fox Mulder's daily affirmations and I think one is hilarious and germain to the situation..."Becoming aware of my character defects leads me to the next step -- blaming my parents."

Good luck. We're all rooting for you.
DV

[SpaceCatMeetsMars]

15. Thank you all! I knew a little bit of Lounge "group therapy" would help

me to think more positively and cheerfully about this.