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Fellas, get some better pickup lines. Please.

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Sannum Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:06 PM
Original message
Fellas, get some better pickup lines. Please.
I was walking home from the store, and this guy, who looked like he had bought the entire Abercrombie and Fitch store, walked up to me and said, "Heaven must be missing an angel, because you are right in front of me.". I rolled my eyes and said "You must be desperate to get laid if you are using that piece of shit line on me". I walked away and the poor guy was stunned that it didn't work, lol. Do guys actually think these lame pick-up lines work? I respond to intelligence and wit...this nut did not posess any of these qualities.

DU Guys---NEVER EVER USE THIS LINE!
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B Calm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:08 PM
Response to Original message
1. My name is ..... but most people call me the Master of Love..
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:09 PM
Response to Original message
2. Is that a keg in your pants?
cuz I'd sure like to tap that ass!


Is that a better line?
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:09 PM
Response to Original message
3. I wouldn't want to be a guy
They're the ones who are always expected to make the first move, to do the pursuing, to ask the woman out, to propose marriage, to initiate sex - way too much pressure, if you ask me.

That is a totally lame line but it must be hard to approach people and try to impress them. I've made the first move many times myself but with guys, it's like they HAVE to. It's expected and a lot of women won't take the initiative.

I'd have such a complex if I got shot down the number of times the average guy must get shot down in his life.
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RC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:42 PM
Response to Reply #3
17. You have an understanding
beyond most women I know. Trying to get to know new women can be very hard on the fragile male ego. It can be corrosive after a while.
Most guys like it when the woman they have been eyeing takes the initiative, shows some interest. It takes some of the load off the guy.

Playing hard to get will leave you back in the corner. You reading this lonely ladies?
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Wapsie B Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:54 AM
Response to Reply #3
26. You're so right.
If you're anything but an Alpha male the fear of rejection is always there. For some of us it's overwhelming. And if you have anything other than an ideal physique that's pleasing to a lot of women that only makes matters worse.

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NightTrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:59 AM
Response to Reply #3
27. I love it when a woman makes the first move on me!
And yes, it has happened to me. More than once, in fact! :bounce:
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Bok_Tukalo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:24 AM
Response to Reply #3
33. I've always been attracted to women who are able to initiate
the first meeting. It shows a level of independence and confidence that appeals to me. Also, it is an indication that they have a certain rebellious attitude toward cultural norms.
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SmokingJacket Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:12 PM
Response to Original message
4. "you wanna go buy a sandwich?"
That's what my guy said.

Worked for me!

Don't try too hard, be honest.
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democracyindanger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:13 PM
Response to Original message
5. Because he said it wrong
He should have said, "Somebody call Heaven, 'cause they're missing an angel!"

If he had said it that way, then you would be posting about how you met Mr. Right last night.
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Lone_Star_Dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:15 PM
Response to Reply #5
7. That's the correct one.
I saw a guy at a club once go from woman to woman using that very line. I actually felt sorry for him.
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unblock Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:14 PM
Response to Original message
6. let's see, a guy walks up to you and pays you a compliment
and you insult him and walk away, convinced that he has neither intelligence nor wit.

perhaps you are correct in your assessment of him, since his opening line didn't pass your test.

do you wonder what he, or anyone else within earshot, might think of you, based on your one line?

the point of a "line" is to invite further discussion, so you have a bit more to go on to judge someone. next time, try laughing instead, call the line lame if you must, but give the guy a chance so you can report back to us with a bit more ammo to back up your conclusions.
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:19 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. Now that I think of that it is a mean thing to do
maybe the pickup line is a test of the hearer and not the speaker
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:23 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. If you really like a girl do you use a piece of shit line like that though
?

I'd like to hope that a guy who's interested in me thinks enough of me to say something original instead of peddling Pickup Line #33.
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JVS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:24 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. There is no such thing as a good line, so yeah.
Lines are cheesy jokes, period, the end.
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:29 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. But girls don't like them.
So if you're using a line to get a girl interested in you, that's counterproductive, no?
(I'm assuming you're a hetero male)

Some good lines are:

"Hi."
"You have very nice eyes/a great smile."
"Can I buy you a cup of coffee/a drink?"
"Can I sit here?"
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frylock Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:45 PM
Response to Reply #14
18. you wanna go out for some pie and coffee?
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MonkeyFunk Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:47 PM
Response to Reply #6
19. Oh bullcrap.
Nobody uses a lame-ass line like that to simply "further discussion". That fratdork thought that he might just get laid by lathering on the flattery.

Note to other guys: To initiate a conversation, just say "Hi". If a woman is interested, she'll respond.

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unblock Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:28 AM
Response to Reply #19
21. wow, it's amazing what you can learn about someone from just one line!
he was a "fratdork", too.
what does this mean, exactly. current fraternity member?
or does that include fraternity alums? pledges? wannabes?

is it absolutely impossible that the guy might be any of a wide variety of personalities and motivations, and just happened to be a little bit clueless in the fine art of conversation-starting?

it's no wonder why some guys feel the need to have pick-up lines in the first place. because some people are apparently going to judge their entire lives, personalities, and relationship prospects based on the first thing they utter. geez.
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Wapsie B Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:47 AM
Response to Reply #6
24. Exactly.
Give the guy a break. He saw a cute woman and he went for it. We're not mind readers. We have no idea as to what a woman's turn-ons or turn-offs are if we just met her.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:21 PM
Response to Original message
9. How about this "Did it hurt?"
You would reply "what?"

then I would say "When you fell from heaven, did it hurt?"

Would that work :-D

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democracyindanger Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:24 PM
Response to Reply #9
12. Or "Is your Dad a saint?"
"Because his daughter's an angel!' :D
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tjdee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:22 PM
Response to Original message
10. If he'd been better looking you would have been flattered, I bet.
Edited on Sat Jan-08-05 06:24 PM by tjdee
The thing is this: It doesn't matter what pick up line is used.

If you're attracted to someone, you're attracted to someone.

If Adrien Brody walked up to me and threw up at my feet (by accident of course!), I'd still want to take him home and make him some soup and kiss him senseless.

I always imagine it going much nicer for us, though-- I'd like to hope that a man won't use such a tired line on me if he really likes ME, and not just my boobs (face/smile/eyes/whatever).

If the pickup line sucked and the rest of the conversation went horribly, that's another story.
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Mr. Blonde Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:29 PM
Response to Original message
15. I don't imagine it was the opening line of when they met, but
this guy I know told a woman to break up with her boyfriend, and go out with him. It worked and they have been married about 20 years. That always amazes me. I would never have the guts to try that one I don't think.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:18 AM
Response to Reply #15
31. I can't imagine anyone actually using this line, but
I read it somewhere, and it made me giggle:

He: You look just like my first wife.

She: Really? How many times have you been married?

He: None, yet.
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Kurovski Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:29 PM
Response to Original message
16. "Oh my gawd! I love your shoes!"
Works for me. :-)
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Boswells_Johnson Donating Member (526 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Jan-08-05 06:48 PM
Response to Original message
20. "I really like your glasses" works like a charm!
:)

I honestly meant it the first time, but she was so surprised (and got a kick out of it) that I couldn't help by try it again.

Just make sure she's wearing glasses first.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:19 AM
Response to Reply #20
32. Yeah, that one might work on me.
Well, I'm married now, but I was single for a good long while, and admiration of my glasses would have been a plus. ;)
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:35 AM
Response to Original message
22. Yeah it's a stupid line but
I guess I just can't do that. I wouldn't exactly encourage the guy, but I would thank him and politely extricate myself from the situation. No need to be rude, right?

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BurtWorm Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:46 AM
Response to Original message
23. How about "Must be jelly, cause jam don't shake like that!"
:thumbsup:
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NightTrain Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 12:49 AM
Response to Original message
25. "Know what I like about you? My arms!"
Edited on Sun Jan-09-05 12:50 AM by NightTrain
:loveya:
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:17 AM
Response to Reply #25
30. I have to admit it.
That one is cute.
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Elidor Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:12 AM
Response to Original message
28. Ain't got no lines
I won my true love's heart by being real. I've never had the chutzpah to use a line, unless I was trying for comic effect.

The real secret: if you can do a decent Bugs Bunny impersonation, women will melt at your feet. :D

How do!
Welcome to my shop
Lemme cut yer mop
Lemme shave yer crop!
Daintilydaintily

Hey you!
Don't look so perplexed
Why must you be vexed
Can't you see you're next?
Yes, you're next
You're so next!
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PassingFair Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:13 AM
Response to Original message
29. My husband's line was the absolute BEST I had ever heard
On our second date, whilst slow dancing, he drew me close and whispered in my ear, "I'm a monogamist, you know".
We've been in blissful monogamy ever since.
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Flammable Materials Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:31 AM
Response to Original message
34. My favorite:
"Hey, please don't mistake this for a come-on or anything. I just wanted to let you know that you are absolutely beautiful."

Then just smile and walk away.

:)
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personman Donating Member (959 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:47 AM
Response to Original message
35. Nice dress...
I wonder what it would look like crumpled in a ball next to my bed...

Hand me a glow in the dark condom and I'll show you a light saber.

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FredScuttle Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:50 AM
Response to Original message
36. "Hi, my name is Fred"
remember it....you'll be screaming it later.
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Bill Lumbergh Donating Member (191 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:52 AM
Response to Original message
37. You're mean.
All he did was compliment you and you insult him. I hope you stay single.
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Senator Lamb Donating Member (492 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:58 AM
Response to Reply #37
38. is it me
or does anyone find glasses on a girl a turn on?
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Bill Lumbergh Donating Member (191 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 01:59 AM
Response to Reply #38
39. indeed
nt
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hfojvt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:21 AM
Response to Reply #37
41. now you know
why they kicked her out of heaven.
La Belle Dame sans merci
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MnFats Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:06 AM
Response to Original message
40. the one that worked for me...
after making some kind of eye contact and perhaps getting a smile...
"I've been sitting over there trying to think of a clever way to start a conversation with you. I can't think of one. Will you talk to me anyway?"

worked pretty well. honest.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:24 AM
Response to Reply #40
42. Lines like that . . .
and "Hi" are highly under-rated. Honesty works.
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Bill Lumbergh Donating Member (191 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:50 AM
Response to Reply #42
43. I prefer just waiting for the women to come up to me.
I'm Bill Lumbergh, you see, so that happens a lot to me.
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:59 AM
Response to Reply #43
45. And I live in Switzerland,
so I have no idea who Bill Lumbergh is. :dunce:
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Bill Lumbergh Donating Member (191 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 03:05 AM
Response to Reply #45
46. From Office Space
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Heidi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 03:07 AM
Response to Reply #46
47. Oh, well . . . in that case,
has anyone ever told you that you look just like Bill Lumbergh?

(Joking, of course. I have no idea what "Office Space" is, either.)
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Mojambo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Jan-09-05 02:56 AM
Response to Original message
44. This thread reminded me of a song by one of my favorite bands
Dance Hall Crashers - Pick Up Lines

I opened up the door and then I walked into the bar
Through the smoky dim lit haze, I saw him from afar
Moved a little closer just to get a better view
He looked at me and smilied and said "I'm the one for you"

We've heard one too many over used pick up lines
Give us some credit we're not sleazy, dumb, or blind


Saw another guy right then, his suit was tailor-made
Unfortunately so were his lines much to my dismay
Thought he had me pegged, tried to impress me with is cash
"You'd look great on my yacht" was the best line that he had
We've heard one too many over used pick up lines
Give us some credit we're not sleazy, dumb, or blind


Over in the corner I saw this one all alone
Looked like Mr. Natural, the kind you would take home
Not like any of the others, this one seemed benign
At least until he opened his mouth "Hey babe, what's your sign?"

We've heard one too many over used pick up lines
Give us some credit we're not sleazy, dumb, or blind


Got fed up, decided to leave after one last drink
Felt a tap on my left shoulder, I started to think...
I can't take this anymore, what will this line be?
That's when he let his line fly "Hi, my name is Steve"
Where have you been all my life, sweet thing?
Can I buy you a drink, marry you, anything?

We've heard one too many over used pick up lines
Give us some credit we're not sleazy dumb or blind
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