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NOW hear this!!!! I don't care if Jennifer Aniston EVER has a baby!

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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:47 AM
Original message
NOW hear this!!!! I don't care if Jennifer Aniston EVER has a baby!
I don't care that Kirstie Ally is still fat!

I REALLY don't give a shit who dumped Lindsey Lohan and I can't even MAKE myself work up a rat's ass about Jessica What's Her Name and her husband...Nick, I think it is? Blond bimbo and her husband who used to do....something?

Seriously. I don't buy the magazines but I do browse through them from time to time. (For the sake of morbidness, and because of damn long grocery store lines....) And what's on the cover of the latest US magazine?

A picture of Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt looking sorta sad.

The BIG GLARING HEADLINE reads "BRAD'S HEARTACHE"

So I think oh? What's this? (Not that I give a shit.) And I flip to page 68, where, after reading the entire four page article, I discover THERE IS NO HEARTACHE. In fact, there isn't even any NEWS. They were married in 2000, there still isn't a baby. The fact that Jennifer Aniston is still NON-pregnant is NON-NEWS.

Oh and I don't care that Julia Roberts just had twins. I don't care that Goldie Hawn looks like shit without makeup. I don't even KNOW who 3/4 of the people are in these rags anymore because apparently you have to watch all the reality TV shows to know who they are nowdays. And I don't watch any of those shows.

More things I don't care about:

1. I don't care WHAT Anna Nicole is doing.

2. I don't care what anyone is wearing unless I particularly dislike that celebrity and what they are wearing makes them look like shit.

3. I don't care that they BUY THEIR OWN GROCERIES and I really don't care about tiny, fuzzy pictures of their spawn. Gasp!

Disclaimer: I did post a thread here just now with a story link about Britney Spears being asked to put her shoes back on during a flight because her feet stunk so badly people all over that part of the plane were grossed out. Now THAT'S good stuff.

Anything you really don't care about that society thinks you should?

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WildClarySage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:49 AM
Response to Original message
1. Nothing you didn't just cover!
:)
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:50 AM
Response to Reply #1
3. What about all the
NEW DRAMAS on TV? Don't you care SO MUCH about them? All of them? You are supposed to!!!!
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Ready4Change Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:50 AM
Response to Original message
2. I miss aliens in market rags.
Remember when aliens would declare in Enquirer headlines "I am carrying Elvis's Love Child!"?

Those were the days.
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:51 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. Oh yeah man
now THOSE were the days. Headlines such as:

"ALIENS DEVOURED BURT REYNOLD'S BRAIN!" were classic.

Along with pre-Photoshop horribly butchered photos.

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WildClarySage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:53 AM
Response to Reply #4
7. My favorite ever- UFO LANDS! Aliens reveal amazing 7-day diet plan!
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:56 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. Of course they do!
Jesus Christ Second Coming Brought To You By The South Beach Diet!!!
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mr_hat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 09:07 AM
Response to Reply #7
28. IT'S A COOKBOOK!!!
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yellowdogintexas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 03:05 AM
Response to Reply #2
23. Yeah, the Hot Sheets from Men in Black!
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mrbassman03 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 05:11 AM
Response to Reply #2
25. Weekly World News is the only one still doing it...
I got a year's subscription for Christmas one year... they had some of the greatest articles. Though I have to say, it got old rather fast.
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Catherine Vincent Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:51 AM
Response to Original message
5. I hear ya!
But what's this about Britney's feet? LOL!
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:52 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. Here ya go!
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Chipper Chat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:56 AM
Response to Original message
9. As long as Americans buy these rags....
they will continue to be printed. Besides, they are such great tools for 3rd world countries to see what the American life-style is all about (as they are building bombs in their basements).
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:58 AM
Response to Reply #9
10. That's why I refuse to buy them.
I only peruse them while standing in long grocery store lines.

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WildClarySage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:02 AM
Response to Reply #10
11. It always struck me as funny
how it was the two fundys I worked with at the local DV shelter who brought in US Magazine and People and left them at the front desk in the office. None of the rest of us ever read that crap, but those two, who were always Jesus this and Amen that, were so into those sleazy rags.
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:04 AM
Response to Reply #11
13. Oh hell yeah
the biggest fundies I know LOVE those magazines and just eat that shit up. They also watch all the tabloid-ey TV shows. I can't even remember the names of them.......Entertainment Tonight? Is that show still on? (I'm really not a TV watcher.)

One of the biggest Bible beaters I know also drinks a ton, pops prescription pain killers like they're going out of style, has been arrested trying to get a phony prescription filled for them, and runs around on her husband.

Oh but she's a good Baptist and in church every Sunday and busy telling other people how to run their lives.

:eyes:
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WildClarySage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:06 AM
Response to Reply #13
16. Well, ya know,
Christians aren't Perfect, just forgiven.

:eyes:
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Chipper Chat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 09:36 AM
Response to Reply #13
29. To be a "good fundie christian" you must maintain a....
"holier than thou" attitude toward others. And they are the first to narc out a neighbor's kid for drinking a beer or smoking a joint, and for spreading gossip about who might or might not be gay.
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nutsnberries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:02 AM
Response to Original message
12. I don't care about ANY of those things either! However....
I DO care about how many cell phones John Cusack has in his hands while he looks thru the papers at his local Malibu paper stand, and I want to see his bed-head and how big his sweat pants are while he reads the papers and holds the cell phones. Go figure.

btw.... I hate myself for this. :spank:
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:05 AM
Response to Reply #12
14. Hee hee.
Your last line made me laugh out loud. It's a quandry, isn't it? I mean if I REALLY didn't give a shit, I would never pick up the rags in the first place. I just tell myself because I don't BUY them it's ok. I really shouldn't even give them a second glance.

:spank:
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nutsnberries Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:11 AM
Response to Reply #14
18. yeah, I tell myself the same thing...
and if Johnny ever drops outta site, I'll have no more reason to look! ;)
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Wapsie B Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:06 AM
Response to Original message
15. I don't care if Ben Affleck
and Jennifer Garner are a couple.


Don't give me hard-hitting news. Give me happy talk! /sarcasm
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:07 AM
Response to Reply #15
17. Ah yes
you reminded me of the A-#1 thing I do NOT CARE ABOUT and that is who is with whom this week.

Celebrity marriages are like a big interrelated game of musical chairs. They all end up in bed with each other eventually.

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Mayberry Machiavelli Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:47 PM
Response to Reply #17
38. Yes, in college my friend and I noted how funny it was that all
celebrities know each other, regardless of what field of endeavor they came from.

That's what was so amusing about the old Bill Maher "Politically Incorrect" show. Panel discussion with, say, Brooke Shields, Michael Jordan, Henry Kissinger, and Mr. T, about Middle East Policy.

"I pity the fool!"
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Algorem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:14 AM
Response to Original message
19. someone should start a gossip mag that digs up the dirtiest dirt on Repub
lican celebrities only
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:16 AM
Response to Reply #19
20. Oh God what a snoozer that would be
Chuck Norris didn't get an acting offer again today!

Bo Derek didn't get an acting offer again today!

Drew Carey still not working!

:evilgrin:
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porkrind Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:36 AM
Response to Reply #20
21. Is Chuck Norris a repugnant?
No wonder I can't watch more than 5 seconds of Walker Texas Ranger.
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Algorem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 09:37 AM
Response to Reply #20
30. What about,say,Pat Sayjack?Everyone wants to hear about him,OK now
I feel like going back to sleep.It could be sold as a sleep aid,that'll work.
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:39 PM
Response to Reply #20
42. Don't forget Angie Harmon, Bruce Willis, and Elisabeth Hasselbeck.
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yellowdogintexas Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 03:05 AM
Response to Original message
22. I don't care that Hillary is an abused wife; I don't care that
Chelsea supposedly had plastic surgery.

I also don't care about any of the above stuff

I am sick to DEATH of
Jessica Simpson
JonBenet Ramsey
the guy who murdered his pregnant wife
any and all lies about the Clintons and the Gores and the Kerrys and the Edwards and the Kennedys

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anamandujano Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 03:43 AM
Response to Reply #22
24. "eat jelly donuts and lose weight"
a real headline from way back when and something we should all care about.

--documented in a weird al song--he must have seen it too--i really saw it, i swear
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nothingshocksmeanymore Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 07:00 AM
Response to Original message
26. You out did yourself this time
:thumbsup:
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Oddly Stevenson Donating Member (109 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 08:59 AM
Response to Original message
27. I care about Jennifer Annistons' baby......
...only becuase I have "Kiwi" in a "What Fruit Will Jennifer Anniston Name Her Baby After?" pool.
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Bouncy Ball Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 11:47 AM
Response to Reply #27
31. ROFL!
Now THAT'S good.

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proud2BlibKansan Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 11:51 AM
Response to Original message
32. I don't care what Dr. Phil thinks!!
Has anyone else just about had enough of Dr. Phil?

I am over him in a big way. :puke:
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gollygee Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 12:03 PM
Response to Original message
33. Wow. I just finished reading People Magazine
that I'm subscribed too. LOL. So I could answer all of those!

:)

For me, it's a love-to-hate-them thing. My husband constantly makes fun of me reading them. But then I find him picking them up and thumbing through them!
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mattclearing Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
34. Scott Peterson.
Fuck'im. What's with the neverending perpwalk, the made-for-tv movie starring Dean Cain, the ridiculous over-coverage of a sad, sad story?

Editorial license is dead in this country. We have been railroaded by crazed corporate profiteers who see no wrong in preying on our weakness for rubbernecking.
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Chipper Chat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:23 PM
Response to Reply #34
35. Gawd - as I'm reading your post....CNN is
repeating the "penalty phase horseshit" for the zillionth time. Just because the smiling bimbos (Zahn, Woodruff, Kagen, and especially LIN) are orgasmic over the story doesn't mean it should be shoved down our throats 24/7.
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fluffernutter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:39 PM
Response to Original message
36. great thread, thanks for the chuckles.
:D
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skygazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:44 PM
Response to Original message
37. The one that drives me nuts
Is the way they all have to speculate if two people are going to get married just because they've been seen together. First of all, who the hell cares? And second of all, why does it automatically translate that you're going to get married just because you've been to a ball game or a club together?

Jude Law leaves his wife and starts seeing some bimbo. "Will they marry?" scream the tabloids. WTF - he's barely out of a marriage - why are they so ridiculously focused on marriage? And why should any of us care?
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Radical Activist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:47 PM
Response to Original message
39. Don't look at the man behind the curtain!
Don't pay attention to the way corporate America is screwing you over with help of their tool Bush! Look over there, a celebrity is doing something funny! haha yes be happy with your gossip mags.
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Mayberry Machiavelli Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 01:50 PM
Response to Original message
40. You forgot Scott/Lacy Peterson or whatever the pimped up trial o' the week
is.

Honestly I don't even remember what the last one was. :shrug:
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Left Is Write Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 02:34 PM
Response to Original message
41. But, Bouncy....
It isn't that "society" thinks we "should" care about the lives of celebrities, it's that a huge portion of the population DOES care, IS nosy, DOES want to hear about the trials/tribulations/scandals/heartaches/joys/bad clothes days/bad hair days/diets/etc. etc. etc. of those celebrities.

Magazines like US, People, In Touch, Star and the like are devoted to reporting on the lives of celebrities. It's what they DO. Those magazines sell like hotcakes because so many people like to feed off of that kind of "news." It's the same principle behind Entertainment Tonight, Access Hollywood, and the entire E! network.

Society doesn't think you should care about those things - but enough people do that through demand they've fueled the machine that is the Hollywood gossip industry.

Personally, I think people ought to be left alone. It is none of our damn business when or if Brad and Jennifer have a baby, and if *I* were perhaps trying to conceive, I sure as hell wouldn't want the whole world standing outside my bedroom door waiting to see if the stick turned pink. Who needs that kind of pressure? I do realize that entering show business means giving up a certain amount of privacy, but I also think the rag mags go too far sometimes. I wish they'd back off and leave a little mystery, a little something to the imagination.
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ikojo Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Dec-11-04 03:06 PM
Response to Original message
43. I could care less who gets fired by Trump
who gets voted off ANY island
who the latest bachelor selects
who swaps wives with whom
who is the anchor on any of the corporately controlled networks
who or what Paris Hilton is doing

People get their knickers all in a twist over celebrity doings but could care less what the politicians are doing to them!

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