I have my first "first date" in 15 years on Sunday.

[Pale Blue Dot]

We are taking the same screenwriting class, and our instructor assigned everyone "homework": go see a movie ("Garden State"), and analyze it according to the screenwriting principles we have learned in the class. Seeing my chance, I walked up to the pretty, nice woman who I had been talking to before the start of class, and suavely turned around and walked quickly in the opposite direction (just like high school!).

Later I regained my courage, and asked her to go with me to the movie. Yes, it's true, I asked her via e-mail (boy, have things changed in 15 years), but for some reason she accepted anyway. Now I'm taking a woman who is really, really cute, who I barely know, to one of the most romantic films I've seen in years. One key and all-important question keeps eating at me:

What the hell do I wear?

We are going to see this movie on a Sunday afternoon, then having lunch together before going our separate ways. Do I dress casually in jeans, or do I go with a slightly more "dressy" look?

Please help. I need to stay focused on the minutia like this so that I don't completely implode (just like high school!).

[flamingyouth]

1. That's awesome, Pat

Just dress in whatever you're most comfortable in. I think a button-down shirt and jeans are fine for a first date to a movie. Now, tell us, is this the woman who's older than you or the one who's about your age?

I'm very happy. You'll do fine. :D

[Pale Blue Dot]

11. She's actually younger.

Possibly quite a bit younger. The older one was married, which I discovered after I special ordered the book she wrote for young girls (I spent $16 - I could have asked her for free.)

I think I'm going into this with the proper attitude - I'm not looking to change my life on one date, I just don't want to be bored or boring. Screaming into the abyss can wait for another day.

[flamingyouth]

14. I hope you have a great time

Don't worry too much about the wardrobe. Just have a good evening; I'm sure you will.

[benito]

2. you have to dress up

no jeans and tshirt for this one. business casual.
and wear your best shoes!

[Insider]

3. congratulations

great news, and a great story

khakis. love em. they go with anything. dress em up or dress em down. any color. khakis for a date on sunday. that's my vote.

good luck.

edit:

where are we going for lunch?

[Pale Blue Dot]

13. You're from MARYLAND?

Man, you have quite a commute for this screenwriting class! :-)

[Brucey]

4. Re: clothes

Use her clothes as a clue as to what she thinks is attractive. Does she usually wear jeans, or skirts? How old is she? How old are you? If it was me, I would wear jeans with a sport coat. It's a little casual, little dressy, also kinda arty... seems to fit for a film class.

[jpgray]

5. I'd say business casual is a good bet

What does she wear to class?

[Kire]

6. wear a costume

like a pirate or a baseball player or something

seriously, I'm happy for you

just "be yourself", the worst that can happen is she'll never want to see you again

*shrug*

[Pale Blue Dot]

15. I think I'll go with the evening gown.

Hell, she either likes me for who I am or not, right? :evilgrin:

[SarahB]

7. I'm clueless, but...

Good luck! I'm still waiting for a date. I've been asked and accepted, but the complexities of the aforementioned date necessitate other factors be taken care of that I am not yet able to take care of which mightily stinks. You're lucky you're out. You'll also do just fine too. :hi:

[Pale Blue Dot]

16. Thanks, Sarah.

You'll have your turn soon, I know it. :hi:

[Lindsey]

8. I think some nice jeans or maybe dockers wth a casual

(not button down but not t-shirt)top. Where do you live? I'm in Southern Ca. and jeans are acceptable almost anywhere plus I'm a lesbian so I may not be the best one answering this question. Anyhow, good luck!

[otohara]

9. Casual Hip

because that's how you sound to me

[Pale Blue Dot]

19. Oddly enough, you're right.

I've discovered, much to my shock and dismay, that I look pretty good in clothes from Old Navy.

[otohara]

20. MayI Suggest An Upgrade

from Old Navy to The Gap for your date...

[necso]

10. Casual, but nice casual.

This is an ambiguous "date".

Act normal. Find out what she likes.

And wait for your chance to pounce (just kidding).

Just be sure to set up a second "date"... as in: "anything".

[Pale Blue Dot]

17. 2nd date is already prepared.

We'll see how this one goes first. :thumbsup:

[necso]

22. Timing is everything, my friend.

But if you can "detach" yourself (in a good way -- by shedding fears, delusions, filters, etc) it can be pretty obvious.

And if she is already committed to a second "date", that, I think, is a good sign. If not, don't wait until the last moment to ask -- it may put too much pressure on you.

[Wilber_Stool]

12. It never gets any easier

does it.

[Kenneth ken]

18. LOL

" Seeing my chance, I walked up to the pretty, nice woman who I had been talking to before the start of class, and suavely turned around and walked quickly in the opposite direction (just like high school!). "

that's my second laugh o' the day! HEyHEY's embarrassing moment was the first. Y'all are putting me in a pretty good mood tonight. - thanks!

:hi:

What to wear? How does she dress for school? Dress similarly, i.e. casual, or grungy or spiffy (not wear a dress just because she often does.) :P

[Pale Blue Dot]

21. Several people have suggested this

It's hard to know for sure, because she comes straight from work to the class.

As I'm thinking about it, I know that I'LL be more comfortable dressed in business casual hip. And if I'm more comfortable, then I'll be more relaxed and I can turn on the charm.

Which reminds me, I have to get my "charm" dial recalibrated.

[Kenneth ken]

23. there you go man

keep as cool as you can.

It's always best to seek your own level of comfortable.

At least your humor setting appears to be set correctly, that's a plus.

[The Backlash Cometh]

24. Rejection by e-mail is always the best way.

Boy, that would have made a BIG difference in my middle school years.

Anyway, as to what to wear, jeans or khakis are fine. Unless you're with a preppy, don't wear the Lacrosse-type shirt. Button down sounds good but no hawaiian shirt on the firt date. And please, please, please don't over-cologne. That's a dead giveaway. Just a nice clean after-shave scent will do.

[daddybear]

25. Dunno why....

but these young folks seem to like a guy in jeans, open neck shirt and a sport coat! I am told it looks "sexy" and casual enough to make them comfortable... go figure...

[sandnsea]

26. jeans

dressy will freak her out. If I were her, I'd be thinking I'm going to this movie with a nice guy from class. Not a date necessarily, but she likes you or she wouldn't even consider it. For me, if a guy showed up dressy for that, he's trying too hard. I'd want crisp and clean, but not dressy. Of course, depends on the kind of woman, whether she's casual or always dressed with a bit more flair. You have to decide on that. Good luck!

[Nay]

27. Yeah, what Sandnsea said. Crisp and clean, but not dressy.

And I would like to echo what someone else said -- no overbearing cologne. A very light touch of a very light aftershave (no extreme musk- or chemically-smelling ANYTHING). Lots of women, including me, are repulsed by anyone drenched in any smell. Less is better. The smell of a nice man's bath soap is the best. It makes you want to get a lot closer to get just another whiff. . .

Ask several women friends what color shirt looks best on you -- they'll know, and will tell you right away. We're good at that kinda shit. Some colors will enhance you to no end, and others will make you look like a corpse. Yer choice. Call yer friends and find out.

[GOPisEvil]

28. Excellent!!!

Good for you! You are a dating fool!!! Do you give lessons? :D

As for what to wear. Be clean...and comfortable...

[slinkerwink]

29. Wear dark blue jeans, and a long-sleeved collared blue shirt

Trust me, women really love guys in blue shirts.

[Lydia Leftcoast]

30. I vote for business casual, too

Nice jeans with a jacket or khakis with a buttoned shirt. That says, "I respect you enough not to wear my grubbies, but I'm not making a big deal of this."

[tjdee]

31. That's so cute.

I think it's adorable that you're not nervous, but...thinking about it.

If she knew about this post I bet she'd think you were adorable (if she doesn't already!).

[terrya]

32. Business casual, Finn.

Hell, no matter what you wear, you're an extremely attractive, personable, intelligent guy with a terrific sense of humor. You'll bowl that woman over!

I'm sending you my very best wishes that this date is very successful. :-)

Terry