When do we women

[laylah]

morph from "Miss" to "M'am"? I have asked men and women this question numerous times and have yet to receive a clear answer. Anyone?

Jenn

[MrScorpio]

1. When you're signing my paycheck. That is always a good sign

:shrug:

[mistertrickster]

11. Hey, Detroit Fan, does Rick Mirer ever get to play? He's from

my hometown in Indiana. Can't keep up with the Lions way out here where I'm living now--it's all Kansas City Chiefs.

[MrScorpio]

14. It's Harrigton's puppy now

I get it has to get real bad, before Mirer gets the call
http://www.forecaster.ca/detnews/football/player.cgi?1083

[mistertrickster]

18. Yup, that's how things have been going for him for quite a while--

Still, it's not a bad gig. Who wouldn't want to be a third string QB in the pros as opposed to sitting behind a desk, heh?

[laylah]

15. WTF? LOL! n/t

[mistertrickster]

17. Sorry, there's no BAD time to talk football, hehehe

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

2. When we marry?

I was "Miss" until I married at age 38. Then I was "Mrs." or "Ma'am". If I had remained single, I'd still be "Miss" or "Ms".

[WilmywoodNCparalegal]

3. M'am sounds genteel?

I honestly do not know... I hate being called "ma'am." I always think of "Gone With the Wind" when I hear that.

[Kierkegaard]

4. Hmmm

Crow's feet or gray hair will usually elicit a ma'am. Other than that, I'm sure it's subjective.

[Spinzonner]

5. Is that called Mamopause ?

[laylah]

8. For your safety...

I will hope you are a woman :silly:

Jenn

[Spinzonner]

10. Is that a Castration Threat ?

Not that I'm doing all that much with them lately.

[laylah]

12. Nawww...

just a castIgation threat :evilgrin:

Jenn

[cally]

6. About 16 but I've always insisted on Ms.

Drives me crazy that how I'm addressed is related to my marital status.

[Kenneth ken]

7. when you move to the south

ma'am and sir are pretty common there; sounds much nicer to hear someone say, "Ma'am?" instead of "what?" - one of the things I liked about the south, even though I didn't acquire the habit.

:hi:

[mistertrickster]

9. Oh, whew . . . I thought you said, "when we DO women" and I was

thinking, "yes? yes? go on . . ."

[laylah]

13. DO NOT

offer up comments like that when one M'am has a mouthful of wine! Please and thank you...:toast:

Jenn

[laylah]

16. OMG!

I reached my 1000 post level during this thread...YEEEEEEHAW:bounce: :toast: It has only taken me since the dark days of December 2000...GAWD, I love DU.

On that note, this M'am is signing off for the evening. Thanks to all respondents...this is a first! :grouphug:

Jenn

[KoKo]

19. I haven't heard the term "M'am" in so long...I don't know how to answer.

Is it still out there? I'm in NC and I only hear it out in the hinterlands...not in the cities in the South. It was LONG GONE in the Northeast, if it was ever in use there at all...I think not.

Why do you ask?

[laylah]

20. Just curious...

once I noticed...which was, oh, I don't know, probably 15 years ago. As a SW/Sociology grad, these things interest me...AND, this is the first thread, since Doomsday 2000, that I have really gotten any response to. Since I have asked this question far and wide for many years, I figured DU would be the place it may be answered in a fashion I understand.

Thanks for responding, KoKo...

Jenn

[KoKo]

21. In the Old South you became M'am when you hit a position of Power...Mother

teacher, Office Worker, anyone older than you. You, yourself didn't become M'am until you "looked older."

It was amorphous but generally being applied to what looked like adult women...or working women.

I miss, it really. In some ways...although it implied subservience it was a term of respect. Just like Yes Sir.

Being called by your first name today is a little "off putting" to folks of us who grew up in the South, but it's prevelent here. Although I notice that "Miss" Koko is used in some dentists and doctors office here to replace Hey Koko...you're next...I find the "Miss" KoKo sort of treating me like a little kid.

I miss Ms Koko, Mrs. Koko and Mr. Koko... But, I'm very old fashioned in many ways. Although I remember when it changed...the usage.

If that gives you more info?

[laylah]

27. It makes the most

sense yet. I wonder what I'll be called when I reach "cronedom". :silly:

The boys at the residential facility where I work me "Miss Jenn" as that is how they are introduced to me. I would prefer "Ms." as I am quite a bit past the "Miss" stage. They do address me as "M'am" when I speak to them.

Thanks for your insight.

Jenn

[KoKo]

23. Congrats on your 1,000 Post! Good for you......

:toast: :party: :toast:

[laylah]

25. Thanks for your

recognition, KoKo...never thought I would see the 1000 mark...I feel real 'portant now :silly:

Jenn

[flamingyouth]

22. Too goddamned young!

:D I wasn't ready the first time! :D

[MrSandman]

24. I've never used Miss...

except as a title for those who prefer it to Ms. OTOH, I commonly use Maam as a sign of respect for elders, waitresses, female clerks/cashiers/salespersons. It is not about age, its about manners.

I am sure there have been some twenty-somethings taken aback at a "Yes maam" from someone twice their age.

[scarlet_owl]

26. I have noticed this recently. I'm only 23 and I'm already a

M'am. Maybe it's because I'm married.

[LWolf]

28. When do we

get a title that is not based on marital status? I don't mean as a 3rd option; I mean, when do women get just one title? Men just get to be Mr.; it has nothing to do with their relationships or their age. When do women automatically get just one?

Or, even better, when do we drop titles entirely?

[CarolynEC]

29. It's "Ms."

"Ms." is the default unless someone indicates otherwise.

There are still -- incredibly -- a few people who are outraged by this title. Oddly, they don't seem to insist that we address unmarried men as "Young Master Smithers" or whatever.

[LWolf]

30. I get called "Ms."

I also get people who ask me if I'm single or married and just prefer Ms., or if I'm widowed or divorced, or...

I work in a profession that has many people using my "title" and last name; this happens all the time. Our culture has not yet let go of the need to categorize women by their marital status, even with the "Ms."

[Berserker]

32. I live in the Midwest

and I'm a male and we refer to women like this. If you are in a bar and there are a few females setting at a table you would ask if they want a drink like this.....Would you guys like a drink? I do not know why but it's what we do. We do not do it to offend any woman it's just the way we talk. Women say it also. I did not realize how strange it sounded until I traveled around the country.

[HEyHEY]

31. When I was 18 I worked as a steward

I called all the young girls Mam, and the old ones Miss, worked well in the tip department

[skygazer]

33. I work retail

I call all women who come through my checkstand "Miss". That's if I'm saying something like, "Excuse me, Miss. Is this your spilled coffee all over the belt?"

If I know their last name (by the receipt or if I know them), I call them "Miss" Whatever or "Mrs." Whatever. If I don't know if they're married, I use "Ms."

I don't like being called "Ma'am". For whatever reason, it makes me feel old, rather than respected. "Miss" seems to please most women - the older among us are happy to be seen as a "Miss". Usually, anyway.