Let's start our own city.

[asthmaticeog]

http://www.cbc.ca/story/canada/national/2004/09/14/kits...

For sale: abandoned B.C. town with lovely view
Last Updated Tue, 14 Sep 2004 14:19:33 EDT

VANCOUVER - If you're in the market for 92 houses, a hospital and two rec centres, an abandoned B.C. mining town – with a $7-million price tag – may be worth a look.

Real estate agent Rudy Nielson, with Niho Land and Cattle Company, said the view from the town is its best selling feature.

"It's a fjord, like you'd see in Norway," Nielson told CBC Online.
"You can see big glaciers. And within one mile of Kitsault, there are eight rivers and creeks.
___________________________________________

Screaming Lord Byron posted the above as a potential compound-site in eyesroll's cult thread. redqueen suggested it as the site of a DU city.

So let's imagine we were to do it. How much would you kick in on the down-payment, what skills could you bring to the community and economy, and what kind of government would we charter?

SIM players, feel free to bring your gaming insights to this.

[jpgray]

1. The DU compound

I'll bring a death ray and matching futuristic uniforms.

[Bucky]

8. oh oh oh! The silvery kind with the big V and a zipper up the front?

Oh oh oh! And give 'em helmets. Dude, I love helmets.

[jpgray]

20. Yes, and guns that are difficult to aim at British guys in formal wear (nt

[dolo amber]

2. I'll be the mandatory town barfly/floozy

:7

[eyesroll]

15. Ooh!

I have an exceptionally strong stomach for cleaning up and holding people's hair back when they vomit!

On edit -- I guess that means I'm in for at least some of the cleaning.

[dolo amber]

34. That may be the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me

:cry:

[redqueen]

3. Assuming there's arable land

I have a green thumb and could help grow our food.

[LynneSin]

14. I'm sure there is good fishing in the lakes nearby

and hunting in the woods!!

[flamingyouth]

4. I'll edit the paper

Or be the town librarian. Whichever. :D

[eyesroll]

32. I'll split the editing duties with you if you bring your new massage-

therapy skills. Every village needs that.
:-)

[flamingyouth]

33. OK, I can be the town massage therapist as well

That's a part-time gig, so I'm not giving up my editing day job! :D

[ronnykmarshall]

67. We need our own TV station.

I wanna do the morning talk show.

[flamingyouth]

73. You'll be perfect!

:D

[KamaAina]

81. It's small enough we'd be lucky to get a radio station

you could still do the morning talk show. Rememmber Chris on "K-Bear" on Northern Exposure?

You have the perfect face for radio, right? :evilgrin:

[eyesroll]

5. I'm a good cook, I know everything there is to know about cleaning

large areas (although I won't actually do much of it), and I can be much fun to be around when I'm in a mood... :evilgrin:.

[Magrittes Pipe]

6. Will there be liquor?

I will require lots and lots of liquor.

[asthmaticeog]

9. It's Canada.

There'll be way better beer than we're used to. And, I assume, lots of blended whiskey.

[terrya]

25. Amen about the beer part.

Canadian beer is superb.

[Magrittes Pipe]

40. Will there be matches and rags?

[eyesroll]

44. So, will you be the bartender?

At least we can trust you'll never put a Molotov Cocktail in a glass and call it a martini...

[Magrittes Pipe]

50. I don't care what I am, so long as I get to burn shit.

[Donkeyboy75]

58. You can be master distiller.

[KamaAina]

79. We'll need to get up to 300 people in a hurry

or become a tourist destination...

http://www.bcliquorstores.com/en/about/liquorpolicy

Rural Agency Stores:

With the exception of small rural communities, government's intent is to restrict retail liquor sales to stand-alone liquor stores. Consequently, new eligibility criteria have been approved for rural agency stores (i.e., general grocery stores permitted to sell liquor in small rural communities that do not have a liquor store). Rural agency stores will be considered in communities of at least 300 people that have a school, post office or community hall or alternately, are a major tourist destination resort. There is a limit of one store per community, and the store must be at least 10 kilometres from other liquor retail outlets.

The moratorium on processing rural agency store applications will be lifted May 31, 2004, and pending applications will be processed under the new criteria.

Once a licensee retail store application has received preliminary approval, a competing rural agency store application in any stage of the process will be turned down. Existing rural agency store appointments that do not meet the new eligibility criteria can continue to operate, but will not be permitted to relocate.

And no I am not a lush like Our Great President Bush* so stop saying that! I remember running across this when a different compound in B.C. came up for sale, and I was thinking along similar lines to this thread.

[Magrittes Pipe]

94. As long as I'm around, we will always be a market for sexual tourism.

[madmax]

7. I'll cook

Love to cook! :P

[Screaming Lord Byron]

13. I call mayor.

Obviously. Diamond Joe Byron at your service. Or, at my service, really.

[redqueen]

19. Just don't go starting up with a crack habit or anything.

[Screaming Lord Byron]

21. Jeez. You should've told me that last week.

[jpgray]

22. That's slander

SLB is very faithful to his black tar heroin.

[asthmaticeog]

28. You'd probably look great in a pinky-ring.

[LynzM]

10. It's a giant DU commune! :)

Excellent :) We could kick in child care, 1/4 of a library, and electrical/building skills!

[terrya]

11. I'll be justice of the peace. To officiate at weddings...

gay and hetero. :-)

[asthmaticeog]

36. AND box turtles.

We're not gonna discriminate in DU-land, no-siree, bub! Except for that the jews should probably be banned from the country club - if we don't have stuff to complain about, our people will die out. Plus, I hate golf anyway.

[terrya]

37. Ok...box turtles as well!

That's right...we practice what we preach. :-)

[Beware the Beast Man]

12. Is the village idiot position still open?

If not, I make a mean town whore :bounce:

[jpgray]

16. Oh yeah, and dibs on dictator for life. (nt)

[asthmaticeog]

24. I'd be amenable to that

but we maybe ought to give dibs to Skinner.

[jpgray]

30. Skinner is merely a puppet!

His shivering chihuahua is the real force behind DU.

[asthmaticeog]

38. Better still!

Having a chuhuahua for a leader will generate press, and press generates tourism! Bring your dollars, stupid Americans!

[LynneSin]

17. I'll be head of the Fire Department....

...I just got done with my Fire Safety Deputy training here at work. I'm sure I could put these newly found skills to work in our new town!!

[Mizmoon]

18. I'll be the odd, bleary old woman who lives on the edge of town

all the kids will be terrified that I'm really a witch!

Then, in a touching Christmastime moment, one will bring me a candy cane and we'll hug... just before I drag him to the basement for a ritual sacrifice.

[BlueJazz]

23. I'd love to setup/help with the networking and

satellite and phone service, computer stuff and such.
I'd like to get together a Band to entertain also...

[monarch]

26. If Bush were to win,

we could easily buy the place with only modest financial contributions from every DUer who has promised to move to Canada. I'd do it in a minute.

[Texasgal]

27. I'll handle the Yoga

Classes, along with providing shots of wheatgrass for everyone...

[flamingyouth]

63. What type of Yoga do you teach?

I practice Anusara. :hi:

[redqueen]

29. I think we should set up our system of government carefully.

I think we should be an autonomous collective ... an anarcho-syndicalist commune, so to speak.

We can take turns acting as executive officer for the week.

But all the decision of that officer must be approved at a bi-weekly meeting by a simple majority in the case of purely internal affairs, but a two-thirds majority for all other decisions.

[jpgray]

39. Yeah, you guys take care of that egghead stuff

I'll design the voting machines. :D

[asthmaticeog]

41. So no king, then?

But then who will oppress us?

[redqueen]

42. The town sadist?

:shrug:

:evilgrin: :9

[Beware the Beast Man]

53. BE QUIET!

I order you to be quiet!!! :bounce:

[redqueen]

55. Order, eh?

Who do you think you are?

[Beware the Beast Man]

59. dupe

dupe

[Beware the Beast Man]

60. Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses,

not from some farcical aquatic ceremony.

You can't expect to wield supreme executive power just
'cause some watery tart threw a sword at you!

[eyesroll]

31. It says there are 92 houses.

So, who's rooming with who?

[Screaming Lord Byron]

45. There's a couple of hundred apartments as well, IIRC.

[eyesroll]

46. Well, if there's a surplus, then...could I have a house to live in

and an apartment for trysts?

Housekeeping would be simpler that way, I think.

[ScreamingMeemie]

35. I am a licensed real estate appraiser, a licensed hairstylist and a

pretty good cook! :hi: So I can make sure we're getting a good deal, I can give good peels, and also serve up a meal!!

[OnionPatch]

43. I'll help Redqueen

with the growing of the food. (Organic only!) I'm a certified master gardener. We can keep the whole town fed and landscaped.
My husband is an excellent salt-water and fly-fisher. Looks like a lot of water there; He can keep us in fish. Oh, and he's a marine biologist, so perhaps he could work with our local environmental department.
On top of that, both of us are artists and craftsmen. (Or am I a craftswoman?)

[Screaming Lord Byron]

47. Here's more details.

http://www.prnewswire.com/cgi-bin/stories.pl?ACCT=109&STORY=/www/story/09-13-2004/0002248947&EDATE=

Located 500 air miles north-west of Vancouver, and a 3.5 hour drive north of Terrace, Kitsault was once a thriving coastal community on the shores of the Alice Arm fjord. The town is surrounded by snow-capped mountains and is situated on approximately 1.5 miles of ocean front. It has been vacant since the early 1980s when a nearby molybdenum mine shut down. A caretaker and his wife are the only residents who remain.
The Kitsault town site consists of over 322 acres on eight titles. It includes approximately 90 houses and duplexes, seven apartment buildings (which contain a combination of over 200 bachelor, one and two bedroom units) over twenty foundations for double wide mobile homes, a shopping centre, two recreation centres, a hospital, a large works yard and a local dock.
The 22,000 square foot shopping centre has premises suitable for a
grocery store, liquor store, bank, hardware store, restaurant, post office, and other specialty stores. Together, the two recreation centres include a swimming pool, hot tub and whirl pool, locker rooms, gymnasium, a library, curling rink, and even the Maple Leaf pub. The Kitsault General Hospital is equipped with X-ray diagnostic equipment, operating equipment, examination room, waiting/reception area and a suite to house visiting physicians and dentists.
Throughout Kitsault, all utilities including telephone and cablevision have been installed underground. Pavement, curbs and landscaping have enhanced the human engineered aspects of the town site. There is even a complete sewage system with lift stations and sewage treatment plant.
"This is a spectacular location and the potential uses for Kitsault are virtually limitless," says Rudy Nielsen, President of Niho Land & Cattle Company. "It could be revitalized as a destination resort or vacation retreat or maybe a cruise ship facility. A buyer could subdivide the property and sell recreational homes. The water, the mountains, everything is here - even a good
sized town. With a little TLC, anything is possible."

Except as to title, the town will be sold on an "as is" basis. Potential purchasers will have to satisfy themselves as to the accuracy and completeness of all information concerning Kitsault before submitting offers.

[asthmaticeog]

49. Hedges gets a double-wide, for sure.

[johnnie]

48. Can I be

The perpetual drifter?

[LynneSin]

51. Might I suggest this island in the South Pacific $1.1million

http://www.privateislandsonline.com/tuamoturangiroaocfp.htm

Canada is just too close to the US for me if we're stuck with that idiot!!

[asthmaticeog]

57. Sounds awesome, but is there infrastructure?

I mean, "The Blue Lagoon" was a great movie and all :eyes:, but is the Democratic Underground ready to shit outdoors? Other than Hedges & Matcom, I mean? If there's plumbing, I'm game.

[LynneSin]

61. READ THE DAMN LINK

On this private island a dream house is waiting for you; Polynesian style in harmony with the landscape but more comfort and more facilities than you would expect; 2 bath rooms, energy, telecommunications… and a design and decoration which will delight you.

It's only 2 bathrooms but that'll hold out until we build more

[asthmaticeog]

68. If I wanted to read links,

why the hell would I be on the internet? ;)

[flvegan]

52. Certified personal trainer, sports nutritionist AND I'll do the closing!

[jackieforthedems]

54. I'll Help Stand Guard

at the city's entrance to help keep Bush out - especially, now that all those assault weapons are available again.

[KamaAina]

76. Sorry, assault weapons not available in Canada

One of my favo(u)rite Michael Moore moments featured him standing alongside a highway leading towards the Canadian border with a box of guns (rifles, if memory serves).

As cars would come by, he'd yell out, "Free guns for Canadians!" There were no takers.

[jackieforthedems]

85. Lol

[mrboba1]

56. I can, well, um...

do the statistics?????

Nevermind, I'll just hang out on the front porch...

[Donkeyboy75]

62. I'll be the mad scientist. I'll create sub-human life forms

to do all the work so we can all live out our hedonistic fantasies...like doing crossword puzzles all day.

[ronnykmarshall]

64. I've got dibs on town gay.

Plus I'll be the town gossip.

But any other gay/lesbian DU'er can help me make a FAB-U-LOS gay district.

But I'm the head queen! Got it?

[LynneSin]

65. Not to disappoint you Ronny,

but I have a feeling we'll have plenty of Gay & Lesbians in our community.

[ronnykmarshall]

66. But I've got dibs!

I'm #1 !!!!

[LynneSin]

69. I dont' know, if Pagerbear is there I'd have to vote for him

But we would have jello wrestling to determine the winner in case of a tie. I've heard that terrya and arwalden have strong factions supporting their claim as the #1 gay!

[ronnykmarshall]

70. FINE!

If they want it ....... FINE! Oh no, I SURE anyone of them will do a WONDERFUL job! FINE! I'm just FINE with it!

Oh, I'll be just happy as a clam. Don't worry about me, I'm just FINE!

Oh just wait when my TV show goes on the air .......

[LynneSin]

71. Did I say it was naked jello wrestling...

...and we oil you all up before you go into the pit.

:D

[ronnykmarshall]

72. Now you're talkin!

[dolo amber]

74. You have to be my best pal

You can't have a queen without a floozy barfly best friend...:D

[ronnykmarshall]

75. It's a deal.

Come on girl, lets get a move before all good barstools are gone!

[KamaAina]

77. Disabilities service officer

in Canada there is, of course, no "ADA coordinator".

Paratransit around a place as small as that could be handled with one van -- but what about access to the outside world? It is possible to reach terra firma from Terrace -- but that is over three hours away.

On the plus side, I could very easily put several of you without any particular skills to work building ramps, installing Braille signs and the like.

[Zero Division]

78. I got dibs on town hermit

I'll come out only when I need to rant and rave about coming disasters.

[KamaAina]

80. The entire brochure is available online

http://216.187.66.170/niho/kitsaultweb.pdf

Detailed townsite map on p. 4 of the PDF doc.

History, overview: a must read! Alas, I don't feel like printing out all 44 pages here at the salt mines...

[Briarius]

82. I'll be the bartender

so be nice :D

[sasquatch]

83. I can be the Hockey game announcer(after I retire from the CFL)

:evilgrin:

[KamaAina]

90. Can you play hockey on a curling rink?

The description of the rec center mentions a four-sheet curling rink but no hockey rink. And now no Hockey Night in Canada either. :(

[sasquatch]

92. I'm sure we can make one in the rec center

Or we could build an outdoor hockey rink that will be seasonal only.

[dolo amber]

84. We should really do this

We'd be like famous and stuff! :bounce:

[ScreamingMeemie]

86. Yeah! And then like, maybe we could have our own reality show even!!!

:hi: :hi: :hi:

[KamaAina]

89. Better hurry, then. The vultures are already circling...

http://www.canada.com/victoria/story.html?id=9f8068d8-8ea3-4698-82ae-96b6d4559997

The town has been on the market for just one day and already 30 people have phoned looking for information. An offer has already been made, and the town is expected to be sold in time for Christmas.

[RetroLounge]

87. I get to open the first house of ill repute!

you're all welcome to work there...

RL

[KittyWampus]

88. I'll Open The Art Movie House

Rocky Horror every other Thursday night... alternated with the Producers.

[EstimatedProphet]

91. I'm a fishery biologist

Salmon are an ongoing concern in that part of the world, so I may be able to help out there. I could start a hatchery...

[mark414]

93. i will make sure

all the 18-24 straight females have a male to chase after

[HEyHEY]

95. The story wouldn't come up for me - is that Ocean Falls?

[Wapsie B]

96. Looks like you'll still need

an adult bookstore, complete with a full array of toys and novelties.

:evilgrin: