A rant against Mullets.

[coloradodem2005]

In a nutshell, the Wesley Willis song.


Cut The Mullet

do something about your long filthy hair
it looks like a rat's nest
do something about your mullet
get out the hair clippers, jerk

cut the mullet(4x)

get the rat's nest off your head
get that crazy ass mullet off your skull
take your ass to the barber shop
tell the barber that your sick of looking like an asshole

cut the mullet(4x)

the mullet is the reason that people hate you
they are sick of looking at your nappy wheat sack
nobody wants to look at you with that mullet on your head
what dont you cut that mullet you numbskull

cut the mullet(4x)

[Droopy]

1. I don't have anything against the mullet

Peace man.

[NJCher]

2. thank you

I don't hate them as much as SUVs but I do shudder when I see them. What is that person thinking, I ask myself.


Cher

[EnfantTerrible]

3. I am so cool...

[elperromagico]

4. Wesley Willis was the poet of our age.

His speciality was the denunciatory poem, as demonstrated here in his poem "Suck My Dog's Dick":

Suck a racehorse's bootyhole
Suck a snow leopard's ass
Suck a constipated goat's dick
Suck my doberman pincher's cock

Suck a cliffspringer's dick
Suck a llama's balls
Suck a jackass's dick
Suck a buffalo's ass, fucking jerk!

However, sometimes his poems tell deeply moving, almost Dylanesque stories, as in this poem, called "They Threw Me Out Of Church":

For the second time, I told the preacher to fuck off
I also told Reverend Henry E. Miller to suck a male camel's dick
He got so tired of my bullshit
He told one of the deacons to throw me out
He then escorted me to the door

When I went to church that same Sunday, I picked up a 2 x 4
I went up to the pulpit and clocked the preacher in the head
He fell to the floor unconscious
Suddenly, the police was called on me
I then ran out of the church with a grin on my face being chased after by the cops

[Droopy]

5. I woudn't exactly say Dylanesque

More like Bukowskiesque.

[Philostopher]

6. Wesley was a poorly controlled schizophrenic, from what I understand.

May he rest in peace -- he died sometime in the past couple of years. He had moments of sufficient clarity to get club gigs and record some of his songs, but overall he was a bit of a mascot/novelty in Chicago. I don't know if he understood the mascot part.

Don't get me wrong -- I don't think the music community mistreated him. I just don't think he understood that the reason he got gigs in the first place was because he was a bit unusual. It all made sense to Wesley.

[neoteric lefty]

7. Rage Against The Mullet

don't be hatin'! Its all business up top but nothing but a party in the back :)