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So after I got back from the war I only had four kids left....

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Robb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:21 AM
Original message
So after I got back from the war I only had four kids left....
I mean, I brought back Tammy and her kids, and Aaron. I had to kill one of the kids, which Tammy didn't like so much. Turned out she and Aaron had a thing, and when she got her promotion she set up two of my boys to take the fall for a thing with the boss's brother.

Then after they went down, Tammy got her sons to take liberties with my daughter -- cut off her hands and tongue afterwards. Even my remaining son Lucky got the boot, hooked up with some bad folk.

So I fooled Tammy, grabbed her sons, and made a pie out of them. Made Tammy eat the pie, then offed her and got my own daughter in the crossfire. In the end, Lucky was the only one left standing -- he buried Aaron alive, and chucked Tammy's body in with the dogs. Lucky took over everything after that.

I maintain had the author of this stuff been alive today, he'd be writing for Fox. :)
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GOPisEvil Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:22 AM
Response to Original message
1. What the hell?
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matcom Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:24 AM
Response to Reply #1
2. Robb has been hitting the pipe again
or the needle :D
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Robb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:25 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. Nah
...Just been re-reading some classics from my big box-o-books in the basement. Ten points (or an honorary English degree) if you know this one. ;)
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gbwarming Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:40 AM
Response to Reply #3
8. An honororary Doctor of Googology might be appropriate..
for respondents who didn't even read the cliff notes (like me)

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&ie=UTF-8&q=aaron+dau...


(Titus Limericks as a google bonus)
http://www.bardcentral.com/tituslims.html


Fifth Runner Up: Douglas Lanier

Titus Andronicus in five lines:

Doughty Titus comes home from the war,
Kills Alarbus to even the score,
Rape and murder ensue,
Plus a maiming or two,
And the banquet's got corpses galore.

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pagerbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:29 AM
Response to Original message
4. Sounds Beaumarchais-ish
Edited on Tue May-25-04 08:36 AM by pagerbear
Bits of it anyway.

Could it be Shakespearian?
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:30 AM
Response to Original message
5. Sounds a little like Titus Andronicus
Edited on Tue May-25-04 08:31 AM by sirjwtheblack
on edit: Sounds exactly like Titus Andronicus
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Robb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:32 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. Ding ding ding!! Monty, tell 'im what he's won!
:)

My only regret is never having seen anyone try to put this one on. It's gotta be a riot.
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:34 AM
Response to Reply #6
7. Well, it's funny that you mention he'd be writing for Fox
Because they produced a VERY good version of this a few years back titled simply "Titus". The style's a bit weird, but it's honestly one of the better film renditions of Shakespeare I've seen. You should check it out - Anthony Hopkins stars as Titus and Jessica Lange is Tamara
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Robb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue May-25-04 08:41 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. No kidding!
Ain't that a corker. :) I'll see if I can lay hands on it.
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