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polmaven Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 08:59 AM
Original message
I will take this opportunity
to say a fond farewell to all my DU friends outside of Massachusetts. i ask that all of you keep all of us who do live in MA in your fondest thoughts on 5/18 and forward!

I am now convinced, after hearing all of the dire pronouncements, and reading the newspaper articles, that, precisely at midnight, on Monday, May 17, 2004, the streets of the Commonwealth will fall into immediate insurrection and lawlessness.

I'm now sure that all Government buildings will self combust.

And finally, at the moment the first JP or UU pastor pronounces the first homosexual marriage as official, the geological fault on which this state sits will become active and the state will fall into the depths of Hades...following, of course, strict boundary lines only. Those of us along the immediate coast line will be ingested into the bellies of whales. Those inland will be crushed into the earth when the boundaries of Rhode Island and New Hampshire come together.

This is the fate of all citizens of Massachusetts, heterosexual, homosexual, bisexual, trans-sexual, non-sexual, adult, child, infant, man, woman or genderless, simply because we live in this, the most Godless state on earth.

So, my fellow DUers, if you dare to became associated with the condemned, and perhaps become condemned by association, please wish us well in those whale bellies.
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Burma Jones Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 09:02 AM
Response to Original message
1. The.....Horror, The......Horror, The ......Horror
Whadda y'all thing ya'll are? Euroopeens?
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 09:04 AM
Response to Original message
2. I'm from Millbury, MA originally
I'm proud of my godless home
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Bertha Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 09:04 AM
Response to Original message
3. I's heared them's good eatin' inside them whale bellies
;)

Dig your post.
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ET Awful Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 09:06 AM
Response to Original message
4. Hell, I'm straight, and I'm half tempted to marry another man . .
just to accelerate the predicted fall of civilization starting Monday :).
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pagerbear Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 11:10 AM
Response to Reply #4
6. Pagerbear volunteers!
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FarmerOak Donating Member (528 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat May-15-04 11:02 AM
Response to Original message
5. It's The Apocalypse!
Run for your wives, unrepentant homos!

Man, it must be KILLING Rehnquist, Scalia and Thomas that they couldn't find a plausible way to stop this! Well, maybe not Thomas... the smart money says he has rented at LEAST a couple of bisexual compilations in his day.

While I'm not gay, many of the guys at my bathhouse are. I say, solidarity, my brothers! Anything that makes Ashcroft pissed off is OK with me!
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