Re: Pitt's dinner and dookus' car

[wtmusic]

Sorry.

No, I really am sorry for resurrecting these two sorry-ass threads from the grave, because the originators probably regret ever having posted in the first place. It all started with this post from Will Pitt:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=105&topic_id=105772&mesg_id=105772

"I just spent $600 on a dinner date. Ask me anything."

Who could have predicted that post would gather 200 replies? There was flaming going on accusing Pitt (I'm paraphrasing) of being an elitist snob blah blah blah, as well as a lot of 'hey Pitt, hope you enjoyed it' kind of support. However Will I think took the flames to heart and asked the mods to lock it. What's done is done, but to Will and others who consider posting threads like this, I have a suggestion that might save you a lot of grief (it wasn't posted by anyone else and hence my reason for disinterrment):

Leave the amount off.

Your thread would not have suffered at all by saying, "I just dropped a WAD on a dinner date", or "I just dropped x weeks rent on a dinner date", etc. The problem with posting numbers is:

1) Maybe if every DUer was as magnanimous as Jesus H. Christ we could all feel happy for you without any twinge whatsoever of envy. But it is at the least insensitive to name numbers which might equal some people's month's rent, two months of food, etc. If you don't care, then don't care, but don't cry foul when some flame you.
2) There are those who routinely drop more than that on dinner and so the post is meaningless.

There are some who will reply with, "wtmusic, for chrissake, lighten up!". No, I'm not going to lighten up. Maybe you have to have been truly hungry once, or have been kicked out of your house to know where I'm coming from.

Most people here know Will as a great guy and very committed to Democratic ideals (as well as being a first-rate author), and personally I hope he had a wonderful time and will remember the night and not the controversy.

Sorry.

[efhmc]

1. Unfortunately not. Will says that it is all "ashes".

Too bad. Wanted to add that I too think some discretion about amounts might have kept the problem from happening.

[Dookus]

2. I was...

evicted from my apartment in 1986 because I couldn't pay the rent.

I went hungry many a night because I couldn't afford food. Spaghetti with butter was a treat.

I started a newspaper route at 13. I got a job at McDonalds at 16. I held three jobs through college: waiter, bartender, furniture mover. Simultaneously. While making the Dean's list.

I left college and moved to San Francisco. I made 15k a year in my first job in the computer biz. I kept at it. I lived with 4 roommates.

After many years, I made some money. I bought a pricey car.

My grandfather was a coal-miner. My father was the first and only person in his family to go to college, utilizing the GI bill. He became a high-school teacher.


As the famous line goes.... I've been rich, and I've been poor. Rich is better.

The sad part is the people who presume that because I have some assets, I must be a materialistic jerk. Well, I've been poorer than most people here and I've been richer than most people here. I wasn't a better person when I was poor than I am today.

[slackmaster]

3. Indeed, money can't buy happiness, but

Poverty can buy nothing.

[mrbill]

5. what are the taxes on that car?

there's registration, are cars taxed as property in california?

insurance?

you could be supporting the economy.

[Dookus]

8. the taxes and licensing

came to about 13k.

including the luxury tax. I was happy to pay it.

[mrbill]

11. ouch

[wtmusic]

6. Dookus, I'm happy for you too

We all have experienced pride in ownership, and it feels good. But 'pricey' is one thing, '$98,000' is another. No need to name numbers.

BTW, you say you've been 'rich'. There are those who would consider whatever you make as being in the poor house.

[Dookus]

12. I named the number...

only to make a point about the thread that was savaging Will.

And I don't consider myself rich. I was quoting Mae West.

I've been extremely fortunate in my life. I have a nice house... small, but it suits me. A nice car (as you all know) and three beautiful cats and a boyfriend who makes me feel like a god.

I was rich on paper, once, now I'm unemployed. I'm not in danger of losing the house or the car, because I managed to save a bit of cash for just such an occasion.

I've been posting on DU for 2 years, and I've told more about myself today than the past 24 months combined. Because I've been mightily offended by a) the savaging Will took and b) the reactionary judgments about my character made by people who knew exactly ONE thing about me.

[liberalnurse]

4. People need to leave the man alone.

I think his sharing was romantic. He obviously felt it safe to post....I read it while at work,and smiled the rest of the night.....

No need to put myself in an intrusive posture! Nor should anyone else.

Leave Will alone folks.....He is a DU treasure.

[catpower2000]

7. He is?

So when he posts something stupid, we're all supposed to give him a free pass? I think not.

Cat

[liberalnurse]

16. Help me here please.....

I work 12 hour nights and am just getting back on track....What was wrong with his post? What are people picking on him for? I missed it.

Like I said, I throughly enjoyed his post. I can't see a thing wrong with it. Is it the cost of dinner? No big deal here. The jesture was purely romantic.

I had a date where he flew me in his single engine plane from Dayton to Cleveland for dinner.....Great! Romance is healthy.

[catpower2000]

18. There's nothing wrong with romance at all...

Here's the problem, as I see it. Compare these two statements:

"I just went to a fantastic dinner with a special friend."

"I just spent $600 on dinner for two."

In the first, the poster is celebrating the dinner, the special friend, and the company. In the second, the poster is bragging about spending an absolutely obscene amount of money on dinner for two people. The second statement is in extremely poor taste, since we regularly have people posting about how they cannot pay their rent, they are going to be evicted, they've been living in their car, they've been eating ramen, they've been unemployed for 2 years in this fucking horrendous economy, etc etc etc.

Cat

[bicentennial_baby]

19. Perception

Perception is shaded by experience and situation. What one may see as bragging and in poor taste, another may see as perfectly fine. Regardless, the level of vitriol directed at Will was over the top,imho. Who is anybody on this board to judge another so harshly?

[liberalnurse]

23. My impression was .....I

He is a guy, smitten and demonstrating his affection by an expensive dinner....Something risky and uncharacteristic. He probably thought long and hard about it and said, "I want to do this." It was not a careless, impulsive act....just sometimes you got to go with the gusto. His message was expressed like a true gentleman.

The rationale for beating on Will reminds me of my mother telling me, "Clean your plate, there are starving children in Africa."
I hear your thinking but would you turn down a date like this or decline to create one because there are people in the world less fortunate?


Life, romance should not stop because some are in a down space. Life should be more fun......its such a short one at that.

[catpower2000]

24. It is about perception, as Bicentennial Baby said above...

It all depends on what you think his motivation was...I'm not a fan of his, so I naturally thought his motivation was negative...there are lots of people on this site who think he's the second coming, so of course they thought his motivation was good.

I still say he could have eliminated the speculation about his motive by leaving off the offending amount.

Cat

[bloom]

9. Seems to me

People could learn something here if they were willing to set aside their ego and listen.

I agree - leave the amount off. Why should that be the important thing, anyway???

[GOPisEvil]

10. Yeah, the amount could have been left off, but...

...this further impresses on me a general sense that people assign their own motives to some of the folks that post here. It was obvious to me that Will had himself a very wonderful and meaningful night, and wanted to share it. He wanted to metaphorically shout it from the rooftops. But, some folks, instead of being happy for him, chose to assign a more sinister motive, that of rubbing our noses in his alleged wealth, or bragging that he would drop 6 bills on dinner at a whim.

I say, take the thread at face value. Acknowledge the fact that Will sacrificed, and will continue to sacrifice for a while just so he could do something nice for someone close to him.

[On the Road]

13. Maybe This is Good Group Therapy for DU

We need to come to terms with differing values, levels of income, and attutudes towards splurging.

Personally, I was aghast at Dookus's $98,000 car. But when I read the exchanges, it was obvious that he was not a materialistic show-off, but someone who had made some money in a tech company and wanted to blow it on something special.

As for Will Pitt, it's well known that he's been teaching high school and is neither rich nor materialistic. Whatever money he's made through his book and speaking engagements he has more than earned. I was touched that he wanted to share his experience.

And no, I don't agree that amounts should be kept quiet. There's too much of that in this country. Money issues can bring out the worst in people, but that's all the more reason to air them.

[avtho]

14. Horse Shit!!!

What do you want, is the progressive party only composed of the homeless and the neer do well??

I'm tickled to death we have folks with money in this party, we need people with money. A party composed of the unemployed will never compete with Republicans. I thought this was a party of those who could handle diversity and differences. I never would have believed there are in this party those who are envious of the successful, that is why those like Rush and O'Reilly and Hannity can portray us as only those who are unsuccessful. Even Rush doesn't drive a Jag.

More power to Pitt and Doofus/Dookus. I wish we all were like them.

[BigMcLargehuge]

15. No disrespect intended everyone, but

How about not dredging this crap up?

The central point of this thread was hammered home in close to 400 posts between yesterday and today. All this thread does is provide a fresh slate upon which those who said plenty (from both sides) yesterday can restate their grievances/defenses.

Why not just move on and do something more productive.

To quote Dr. Evil, this is re-goddamn-diculous.

[Kamika]

17. Hello can we beat the horse some more??

I think the f****ng horse is dead ok???

For crying out loud that pitt guy wrote one of the gazillion blablabla ask me anything and then starts crying about it and everyone and their mother starts crying too.

You know there would have been a really easy solution to all of this and that would have been to not actually write that post.


sorry but im dead tired of those stupid meaningless posts and then someone actually starts to cry when he gets abit flamed.. geez grow up

[LTR]

20. Remember...

If you want to live like a Republican, vote Democrat!

Hey, my hat goes off to anyone who becomes successful with hard work, honesty and intelligence. Why should we not reward ourselves?

I thought this was a capitalist society, not a socialist one.

[Booberdawg]

21. I alerted on this

Isn't it about time to give it a fucking rest and quit picking the mans bones like a bunch of vultures. Jeezus!

[wtmusic]

25. Alert all you want

There's no rule broken here.

[supernova]

22. It's perfectly fine to spend $$$ on yourself

I have no problem with it at all. You earn it; you should spend it the way you want to.

I agree with you though, those threads would have been better received if Will and Dookus had left off amounts. We didn't need to know that, if only b/c some people are going to read more of their personality into it than necessary.

[matcom]

26. you fucking people crack me up

pathetic how much you care about this.

sad really

i would reply to catpower's inane comments myself but she has me on ignore and won't see them anyway.

get a life y'all