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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:02 AM
Original message
Athiest humor
An atheist goes on vacation in Rome, and manages to get a meeting with the Pope. The meeting had continued for over 6 hours when one of the guards becomes curious as to what is being said. He puts his ear to the door and overhears the conversation.

"I am very concerned with your beliefs young man and no longer know what to say. You are like a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn't there" , said the Pope.

The atheist repositions himself in his seat then says, "Well, the way I see it is this, you are also much like the blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat that isn't there. But, the difference between us is that you have found it."

:evilgrin:
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doubleplusgood Donating Member (810 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:07 AM
Response to Original message
1. Q: What does an atheist say
...during the height of passion ?

A: "Oh no god ! Oh no god !..."

:-)
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Book Lover Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #1
14. "My lack of God! It's Trotsky!"
Monty Python quote for those who don't know :-)
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Name removed Donating Member (0 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:09 AM
Response to Original message
2. Deleted message
Message removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.
 
Squistion Donating Member (15 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:31 AM
Response to Reply #2
3. Not technically true
Atheism is a belief. Most Atheists I know have very strong convictions on the subject of God. It would be an Agnostic who would be lacking conviction on the issue.
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lazarus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 04:43 PM
Response to Reply #3
17. just an FYI
agnostic is an adjective meaning "without knowledge." So one can be an agnostic Christian, a gnostic Christian, an agnostic atheist, or a gnostic atheist.

The difference is whether one asserts knowledge. An agnostic or "soft" atheist doesn't believe in god, a gnostic or "hard" atheist believes there is no god, which is fundamentally different.
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 05:18 PM
Response to Reply #3
18. Not really
Look at the word. If the word theism means a belief in god or gods and the prefix 'a' means without, then it becomes clear that an atheist is simply someone without a belief in god or gods.

The matter may be confused by the fact that some of the more vocal atheists tend to be assertive about their beliefs. Furthermore just as some theists do not fully understand the nature of their beliefs the atheists too may be a bit muddled (no muddle that was not a ref to you :) ) about what it is they believe. A lot of emotions can get tied up in this question. Therefor they may compensate by over reaching their position. Insisting they know there is no god.

There are two different thoughts going on here. There is the question of if an individual believes in god or gods. This is addressed by the words atheism/theism. Then there is the question of what they know about the universe. This concept is addressed by the terms agnosticism/gnosticism. We are more familiar with the term agnostic than gnostic. This is because more people are ready to grasp the term agnostic for the simple fact that it is very difficult to be gnostic.

The thing is you can be an agnostic and believe in god. You can be an agnostic and not believe in god. Thust telling us you are an agnostic does not tell us whether you believe or not. It doesn't even tell us what you do or do not believe. It only tells us that you are aware that you do not know in a absolute sense whether what you believe is true or not.

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alvis Donating Member (665 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:37 AM
Response to Reply #2
4. Convictions aren't limited to gods
One can have many other convictions, which may or may not include gods.
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Nicholas D Wolfwood Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:47 AM
Response to Reply #4
5. you missed a part
He said agnostics lacked conviction "on the issue", not in general.
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alvis Donating Member (665 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 09:56 AM
Response to Reply #5
6. I may have missed that part
I may have missed that part. Thanks for pointing that out. Unfortunately the message has been removed. This could have made for an interesting discussion. I very often find that agnostics/atheists are thought to "believe in nothing" and/or have no "convictions". I try to clear of that misconception when I can.
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:04 AM
Response to Original message
7. What's the difference between Santa Claus and Jesus Christ?
Santa Claus is real.


My dad told me that one when I was 7 and I laughed my atheist ass off.
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:06 AM
Response to Reply #7
8. HEY YOU!!
:loveya:

I was just wondering if you'd dried up and blown away...how are ya? :hi:
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:13 AM
Response to Reply #8
11. Tired.
Very tired.

My wife went to brunch with a friend, so I FINALLY have some DU time this morn before I have to go to work.


I miss my DU comrades! How's by you?


And here's another joke, not exactly atheist, but:

Why did women love Jesus so much?

Because he was hung like this: (holds out arms in crucifiction pose)
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Az Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 05:26 PM
Response to Reply #7
20. Santa clause is
The atheists starter kit.
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Whitacre D_WI Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:10 AM
Response to Original message
9. AWWWW!
dolo amber told a joke!

Isn't that quaint?
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dolo amber Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:13 AM
Response to Reply #9
10. You be quiet
Lest I get angry...you wouldn't like me when I'm angry...



Hmmm...then again, you might. I look DEAD SEXY in that pic, eh? :D
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RandomKoolzip Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:15 AM
Response to Reply #10
12. I like Mr. Ferrigno's Capeizos!
Edited on Sat Apr-24-04 10:15 AM by RandomKoolzip
Looks like he's out to go to get a mani and maybe buy a cannoli. Darling footwear!
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NMDemDist2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:16 AM
Response to Reply #10
13. except for the lame shoes
you gotta lose the shoes
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Whitacre D_WI Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 10:43 AM
Response to Reply #10
15. I fear you not, hulk. For THIS is my true identity:
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Nay Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
16. What does it say on an atheist's tombstone?
"All dressed up and no place to go"
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BlueJazz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Apr-24-04 05:23 PM
Response to Original message
19. What did Jesus say when they first raised him up on the cross?
"Whoa..Cool..Hey Paul!...I can see your house from here.
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