obnoxious email poem-Now I Sit me down in school and my response in verse

[Extend a Hand]

Now I sit me down in school
Where praying is against the rule
For this great nation under God
Finds mention of Him very odd.

If Scripture now the class recites,
It violates the Bill of Rights.
And anytime my head I bow
Becomes a Federal matter now.

Our hair can be purple, orange or green,
That's no offense; it's a freedom scene.
The law is specific, the law is precise.
Prayers spoken aloud are a serious vice.

For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.

We're allowed to cuss and dress like freaks,
And pierce our noses, tongues and cheeks.
They've outlawed guns, but FIRST the Bible.
To quote the Good Book makes me liable.

We can elect a pregnant Senior Queen,
And the 'unwed daddy,' our Senior King.
It's "inappropriate" to teach right from wrong,
We're taught that such "judgments" do not belong.

We can get our condoms and birth controls,
Study witchcraft, vampires and totem poles.
But the Ten Commandments are not allowed,
No word of God must reach this crowd.

It's scary here I must confess,
When chaos reigns the school's a mess.
So, Lord, this silent plea I make:
Should I be shot; My soul please take!
Amen

My Response:

Now I sit me down in school
Where public prayer's against the rule
The reason that this nation's great
Is separation of church and state

Public schools can't spout one creed
It's not their place in prayer to lead
For if teachers in the public schools
de-cide which religion rules

Do you really think they could agree
There are teachers of all faiths, you see.
The law is specific, the law is right.
God needs no government oversight

No one wants to stop school prayer
And Christian leaders be aware
Those who insist in prayer to lead,
see Matthew 6, it's a good read.

Remember when, in times gone by
the teachers prayed to God on high
back then schools were lily white
those colored folk were not in sight

Ah, times were better way back then
God fearing people didn't sin
the KKK would quote the bible
jim crow ruled, no one was liable

back then in the good ol' days
teachers often were old maids
see, married women just weren't hired
and married teachers heard 'you're fired.'

Until the twentieth century
Women were just property
A woman's place was in the home
barefoot and pregnant (not alone)

In old, old days so bright and sunny
The rule of thumb protected mummy
Wife beating with a stick too big
was under law prohibited.

Back then, in the good ol' days
poor children worked ten hour days
School was for the privileged few
After all, it was their due

So these rants for public prayer
Free citizens all should beware.
Wise founding fathers did forsee
No future in theocracy

Official prayer in public halls
Really does divide us all
In silence when we meditate
I thank my Lord there's no church-state.
Amen.

[Caoimhe]

WOOOHOOOO!!! That's AWESOME!

KUDOS! You got SKILLS! I wish I could see whoever's face when they get that reply!

[Caoimhe]

1. WOOOHOOOO!!! That's AWESOME!

KUDOS! You got SKILLS! I wish I could see whoever's face when they get that reply!

[Extend a Hand]

11. Thank You

yeah, I wish I could see her face too

[Tom Yossarian Joad]

2. What a great answer! Let me be the first to recommend this!

Kudos!

[Vanje]

3. Praying is not "against the rule'

a student may silently pray all frigging day long to any or all dieties.
or not.

The teacher may not lead students in prayer to his/her particular diety.

[proud2BlibKansan]

14. "As long as there are tests,

there will be prayer in school."

That's a great bumper sticker I have in my collection.

[Extend a Hand]

27. ooo, need to add that in

after the verse on no one wants to stop school prayer

As long as there are tests in school
prayer will remain the rule
while studying might do more good
kids will pray, that's understood

[proud2BlibKansan]

29. That is great

Your whole poem is very good. A+

[trof]

4. kicked and voted

[spuddonna]

5. Simply awesome response...

Great poem! Thanks for sharing it!!

[erinlough]

6. BRILLIANT

and recommended.

Thanks

[Iris]

7. Guns have been outlawed?

I missed that one.

[lildreamer316]

8. "God needs no government oversight"

best line ever. You friggin' go.........

[karlrschneider]

9. Nicely done.

[nini]

10. I always answers these telling my friends to stop and think

they always thank me for reminding them of why this is BS they're forwarding around.

BUT I've never answered quite this way... this is awesome and recommended!

[chalky]

12. I want to give you fair warning that I'll be stealing this...

[Extend a Hand]

21. Thank you! and please feel free

I'm really suprised and happy to actually be on the greatest page

[MsUnderstood]

13. Great poem!

Some non-rhyming points:

The schools dress code and policy enforce the color of hair and profanity used. It is up to parents to make sure their kids follow it and the school to send em home, but just try to make a parent leave work to pick up their kid for swearing nad you hear "everyone does it"

Bowing your head in classs to pray during your lesson? Sounds more like sleeping not praying to me.

[Extend a Hand]

25. sleeping in class

is what I thought of too.

I started to address each stanza specifically and then decided that I'd probably just get a bunch of emails back telling me that teachers used to lead school prayers and schools were better and safer then. So I was trying to address the excuse I expected to hear back.

[FSogol]

15. Nice job. n/t

[alcibiades_mystery]

16. Gut shot response...brilliant

[really annoyed]

17. Kick! Great job!

I may have to put your response away for the time I get this chain letter.....

[No Exit]

18. Very, very, very GOOD!!!

[Hekate]

19. I'm saving this to use next time I get a "God'n'country" spam

This acquaintance of mine kept sending me spam that made me blow my stack -- the combination of pseudo-piety, historical inaccuracies, and outright lies were just too much. The worst one ended with "(Liberals) should sit down and shut up!" the alleged point being that we are a tiny minority of atheists in a Christian nation.

I've asked her to take me off her list, but I just know that someday I'll open my e-mail and...

Thanks a bunch for sharing a ready-made and even humorous response. It's just what I needed.

Hekate

[nemo137]

20. nice Matthew 6 quote.

Well played, sir or madam.

[Dark]

22. This one really got me:

For praying in a public hall
Might offend someone with no faith at all
In silence alone we must meditate,
God's name is prohibited by the state.


Uh, didn't Jesus say NOT to to wear your faith on your sleaves?

[Extend a Hand]

23. yes!

In Matthew 6:5-7

[KBlagburn]

24. prayer in school IS NOT against the rules (law)

[ContraBass Black]

26. I prayed in my public school every day.

I pray at my public university every day.

Try and stop me.

[Extend a Hand]

31. I wouldn't dream of it

the point I was trying to make was that
teacher-lead prayer has no place in a public school class room

Do you think most Jewish people want their kids to pray in Jesus name,
what about Wiccan prayers? Muslim prayers? Some Christian sects reject all public praying.

I specifically said:
No one wants to stop school prayer
And Christian leaders be aware
Those who insist in prayer to lead,
see Matthew 6, it's a good read.

I'm sure I'm showing my age, but I remember feeling sorry for the Jehova's witness kids that had to go stand in the hall (just like kids that were punished) when the class did the pledge every morning.

[ContraBass Black]

32. Yes, you did say that.

And no, I didn't read it, even though I thought I said every line of the poem aloud.

I'm sorry.


May I blame the lateness of the hour?

[Extend a Hand]

33. np

[NMMNG]

28. The original poem is ridiculous, but your response is absolutely amazing

I'm sorry I could recommend it only once.

[Richard Steele]

30. WOW! Just...WOW!

Rebuttal in verse is just so "17th century"...
which makes it utterly PERFECT for this situation!

And your inclusion of so many gut-level issues,
in such few words...
And your creative rhymes (stick too big / prohibited)
are the best I've seen since Murray Head had a show
on broadway!

Just...absolutely...brilliant!

[gardenista]

34. With some posts, you get through the first two sentences and recommend

this was one of them!

Great work!

[flygal]

35. Very Good - I'm hoping I get that email soon!!

[myrna minx]

36. What a fantastic reply!

[ms liberty]

37. Bravo! Bravo! Bravissimo!

nt

[LT TX]

38. Awesome!

I love it!

[progressoid]

39. UH OH, I should be getting that one from a couple of my reletives soon.

Love your response.

[TK421]

40. Very nicely done! I bet this moran has smoke coming out of their ears

this is HUGH1111111

[hippiegranny]

41. this is great

the perfect answer when we "reply all" after receiving one of these odious forwards!

[Warren DeMontague]

42. You. RULE.

[Mutley]

43. Beautifully done!

This is the first time I've ever eagerly awaited a RW email.

[dback]

44. Three cheers on that one

Beautiful stuff. Hope it makes the rounds in cyberspace.

[Oeditpus Rex]

45. Massive!

I copied and saved it. Can't wait for an opportunity to use it.

[SeattleGirl]

46. Excellent!

What a creative (and very well done) way to respond to the email!

[OnionPatch]

47. That's great. Love it.

I have a take on the school prayer issue that I wish more people would voice: Republicans are always talking about "personal responsibility" Well, they need to take responsibility for their own religion instead of forcing the public schools and institutions to do it for them. If you want your child to learn about God, take him/her to church. Sponsor your own "Godly" functions. Stop trying to get taxpayer money to fund the promotion of your religion.

[bertha katzenengel]

48. "God needs no government oversight" - this atheist says right on.

GREAT line.

Very well done!

[Mad_Dem_X]

49. Wonderful! I will be forwarding this!

Very well done!!!!

[chimppyhater]

51. The person who sent this is a clod

who knows nothing about what is God

When one knows God, they then are free. No need to impose their BS on you and me


Thanks for starting an excllent thread k/r

[corkhead]

50. Nice.

[kaybea]

52. "I'm a crass and senseless tool"

Anyway, that's the 2nd line response I would've written to that dumb ass doggerel.
Yours is better. And nicer.