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The Night Before Fitzmas (An Epic Poem)

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Island Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:19 PM
Original message
The Night Before Fitzmas (An Epic Poem)
'Twas the night before Fitzmas, when all through the house
Not a Republican was stirring, nary a louse;

The stockings hung on the chimney for the season,
In hopes that St. Patrick would soon mention treason.

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,
While visions of indictments danced in their heads;

And pa in his bandanna, and I in my cap,
Had just settled down for a short evenings nap,

When out on the White House lawn there arose such a clatter,
I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the computer I flew like a flash,
Tore open DU and pulled up my wonky stash.

The moon on the mullet of Harriet Miers
Shown the light of mid-day on all that conspire,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a miniature Pirus, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and phat,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Pat.

More rapid than bald eagles his coursers they came,
And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Kerry! now, Edwards! now, Clark and Howard Dean!
On, Clinton! on Boxer! Pelosi and Harry Reid!

To the top of the Capitol and over the Hill!
Now dash away! dash away! dash away still!"

As dry leaves that before the Cat 5 hurricane fly,
When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the White House the coursers they flew,
With the sleigh of accusations and St. Patrick too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
No hemming or hawing just the sound of the truth.

As I read my monitor and was jumping around,
Down the chimney St. Patrick came with a bound.

He was dressed in faux fur, from his head to his toes,
And was bursting with news for DU and Daily Kos;

A bundle of indictments he had flung in his stacks,
And he looked like a prosecutor just stating the facts.

His eyes - how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like John Kerry's!

His droll little mouth was drawn up in a smile,
With a look of resolute in his eyes all the while;

With a brief little hiccup and a slight little burp,
He began talking and describing the perp;

"He has a big round head and a jiggly belly,
That shakes when he laughs like a bowlful of jelly.

He is chubby and plump, a right evil old elf,
And he laughs and he smirks, in spite of himself;"

With a wink of his eye and a twist of his head,
St. Pat let me know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke no more words, but went straight to his works,
And issue enough indictments to annihilate the jerks,

And laying a finger aside of his nose,
He gave me the signal that he had handled my foes;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,
And away they all flew like a rocket or missile.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,
"Happy Fitzmas to all, and to all a good-night."

****************************************************************

My Fitzmas gift to all my fellow DUers especially everyone in the JK Forum! Merry Fitzmas!
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Sydnie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:25 PM
Response to Original message
1. WOW I have a new Fitzmas tradition poem to read by the fireside this year
:applause: :applause: :applause: :applause: :applause: :applause:

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Lancer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:25 PM
Response to Original message
2. Well done! I wish we had a "bowing" smiley. n/t
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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:12 AM
Response to Reply #2
26. Here, I keep ones I like on
my notepad...


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sueh Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:28 PM
Response to Original message
3. Fabulous!
:yourock:
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bear425 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:28 PM
Response to Original message
4. ! n/t
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KyndCulture Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:29 PM
Response to Original message
5. Nominated!!! Woot!! Merry Fitzmas my friends! nt
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prescole Donating Member (416 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:32 PM
Response to Original message
6. Now THAT'S funny! n/t
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stop the bleeding Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:35 PM
Response to Original message
7. Nominated! Awsome and well said
:toast: :toast: :toast: :toast: :toast: :toast: :toast: :toast: :toast:


:beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer: :beer:


:headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang: :headbang:


:applause: :applause: :applause: :applause: :applause: :applause: :applause:
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AuntiBush Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:37 PM
Response to Original message
8. Merry Fitzmas, to you too "Island Blue!"
Luv-ed your epic poem! :)
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abluelady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:40 PM
Response to Original message
9. Wonderful!
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tulsakatz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:41 PM
Response to Original message
10. that was great!!!
and I love the kitty picture too!! :-)

A Happy Fitzmas to all!
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Tinksrival Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:43 PM
Response to Original message
11. Another chance to post Georgia10's Fitz pic
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Ugnmoose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:48 PM
Response to Original message
12. Very well done - congrats
:thumbsup:
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globalvillage Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 09:59 PM
Response to Original message
13. Nicely done, IB.
Merry Fitzmas to you, too.
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alittlelark Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 10:20 PM
Response to Original message
14. I need to put up a Fitzmas Tree after reading that....
That was great!!!
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KeepItReal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 10:52 PM
Response to Original message
15. An instant classic!!
Kudos!

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mzmolly Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Oct-19-05 10:56 PM
Response to Original message
16. Get ready to send this to editors across the country.
Many are going to need a chuckle.

Very well done!! :toast:

One more recommendation for ye.
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FizzFuzz Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 08:12 AM
Response to Original message
17. This here DU is one AWESOME place.
because of people like you

This is terrific!

And to think its a story inspired by actual events

:grouphug:
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lavenderdiva Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 09:14 AM
Response to Original message
18. Loved it! This is wonderful!
thanks for all your efforts in making this classic a new 'classic'!!! :yourock: :woohoo: :applause:

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rmgustaf Donating Member (98 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 09:17 AM
Response to Original message
19. It's too bad...
they already gave out the Nobel Prize for Literature this year.
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ThingsGottaChange Donating Member (805 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 09:24 AM
Response to Original message
20. Outstanding work, Island Blue!!!!!!!! n/t
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ginnyinWI Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 09:40 AM
Response to Original message
21. well done, IB!
I'll bet you had great fun composing. :)
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melissinha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 09:58 AM
Response to Original message
22. Merry Fitzmas, IB and All! Send to Sam!
Edited on Thu Oct-20-05 09:59 AM by melissinha
just thinking about a Silver Bells adaptation this morning...


Have you sent that poem to the Majority Report, I know Sam would read it!
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Lone_Star_Dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 10:07 AM
Response to Original message
23. Excellent!
If you don't mind I would love to send this out to several people, giving you full credit of course.
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Island Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:49 AM
Response to Reply #23
29. Please send it to anyone you would like to!
I know some people are just really hard to buy Fitzmas gifts for, so if this helps, be my guest!
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Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 10:38 AM
Response to Original message
24. Email to my friends!
This is just great clever one.
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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:11 AM
Response to Original message
25. Merry Fitzmas
Merry Fitzmas, Merry Fitzmas,Merry Fitzmas, Merry Fitzmas,Merry Fitzmas, Merry Fitzmas,Merry Fitzmas, Merry Fitzmas,to all. :applause:
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melissinha Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:17 AM
Response to Original message
27. Indictment Time:Adaptation of Silver Bells
http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.ph...

Here's my adaptation of Silver Bells dedicated to Island Blue, Sam Seder, DailyKos, and most of all St. Patrick!!!!


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Island Blue Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:44 AM
Response to Original message
28. Thanks to everyone for reading and for all the recommendations!
I'm glad y'all enjoyed it! Merry Fitzmas & Happy Blue Year!
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PegDAC Donating Member (906 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
30. Apologies to Capra
Every time a Buscist is indicted, an angel gets its wings! O8)

Love the poem!!
:toast: :beer: :headbang: :woohoo:
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PegDAC Donating Member (906 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 12:06 PM
Response to Original message
31. I sent this
To Randi Rhodes as a show submission. Gave you and DU oroper credit.
:thumbsup: :hi: :loveya:
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napi21 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 12:08 PM
Response to Original message
32. That's terrific! Thanks!!!! n/t
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Liberal Dose Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 12:15 PM
Response to Original message
33. Goodbye Festivus, Hello Fitzmas!
'tis the season :applause: :kick:
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blue northern Donating Member (190 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Oct-20-05 08:07 PM
Response to Original message
34. "The moon on the mullet of Harriet Miers"
Edited on Thu Oct-20-05 08:10 PM by blue northern
you slay me
nice work
thanks for the belly laugh


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No DUplicitous DUpe Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 12:54 AM
Response to Original message
35. MERRY LITTLE FITZMAS..Posted by BobbyG on huffpost...Ha Ha
http://www.huffingtonpost.com/jim-moore/the-most-import...

MERRY LITTLE FITZMAS

Have ourselves A Merry Little Fitzmas,
Make our nation right,
From now on
The WHIGs will all be in plain sight.

Have ourselves a Merry Little Fitzmas,
Make those bastards pay.
From now on
Indictments will have made our day.

Here we are, charges coming soon,
The Grand Jury's tune will roar.
Rule of law once so dear to us
Gathers near to us once more.

Through the years
They all will be together,
If Club Fed allows.
We could hang them all from just the highest boughs.
But have ourselves A Merry Little Fitzmas now.

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burrowowl Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Oct-21-05 01:36 AM
Response to Original message
36. LOL
Another good parody, like TwoSparkle's!
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