Fuck the South

[Luminous Animal]

http://fuckthesouth.com/

Fuck the South. Fuck 'em. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they'd stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep.

...

Cause we fucking founded this country, assholes. Those Founding Fathers you keep going on and on about? All that bullshit about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn't bother to read the first half of the fucking sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were fucking blue-staters, dickhead. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the fucking monuments are up here in our backyard?

No, No. Get the fuck out. We're not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and fucking Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those fucking stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for fucking blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their fucking Subarus together and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this shit, so don't get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I've been a state for almost a hundred years" dickheads. Fuck off.

...

The next dickwad who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is gonna
get their ass kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal fucking dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, motherfucker, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, asshole, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, assholes, it’s fucking our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own fucking stop signs, assholes.

[drhilarius]

1. Thomas Jefferson=Virginian

I stated something similar a few days ago, much to my regret. This is not going to fix this country, but it will only cause a schism between Northern and Southern democrats.

[prof_science]

2. As far as rants go,

this one is pretty weak, I think. I'd link better ones, but man, I'm so tired.

[RBHam]

3. The election was stolen, massive fraud everywhere...

Including "the south"...

There's a lot of good people in the south who are not talibangecals, and who want the Bush Crime Family dissolved once and for all - just as passionately as the rest of us...

[pauliedangerously]

4. I don't think this is appropriate.

There are a lot of good people in the South. I know; I used to live there. There were a lot of close races down there and posts like this won't yield any improvement.

There are lots of effective ways to fight, but this isn't one of them.

[noiretextatique]

5. registered democrats in the south were pretty loyal to democrats

someone posted exit polls figures for the southen states, and registered democrats there were very loyal. the figures ranged from a low of 69% of registered democrats who voted for kerry, to most in the 80%+ range.

[Cyrix]

7. Who said they weren't?

Obviously you didn't read the site.

It was clearly directed at the republicans in the south.

[noiretextatique]

9. no, i didn't bother

because of the title. you will see what i mean soon enough.

[Cyrix]

6. Loved that

As someone from the south I can vouch that he is 100% correct.

And before someone says "well there are democrats in the south!" give me a freaking break. No kidding there are. The fact remains there is no bloody contest between the south and north as far as who has the most idiots.

[Journeyman]

8. Got any links that use imagination or intelligence?. . .

Anything that's got a positive flair, maybe something not completely mired in mindless hate?

"There are plenty of good reasons for fighting, but no good reason ever to hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty Himself hates with you, too. Where's evil? It's that large part of every man that wants to hate without limit, that wants to hate with God on its side. It's that part of every man that finds all kinds of ugliness so attractive. It's that part of an imbecile that punishes and vilifies and makes war gladly." -- K .Vonnegut

[NoSheep]

16. Thanks.....Radical Liberal from the South

:hi:

[saracat]

10. I think this is hilarious! And southerners should have a sense of humour

about this. I can take the north and the west being made fun of. I am an easterner who lives in the west. Arizona, one of the dumbest states in the union. We are 49th in education. The truth is the truth folks!

[Swamp Rat]

11. Aw! C'mon! Are you falling for this "red state, blue state" meme?

Or are you just posting this to get a reaction from we little ol' Suthanahs? :D

Anyway, this rant conveniently forgets how we New Orleaneans kicked the crap outta the British in Chalmette battlefield, just a few miles down the river from me. Jean Laffitte and a bunch of pirates, Cajun trappers, slaves and Indians used gorilla warfare to beat the living tar out of thousands of Redcoats, while we took a only dozen casualties.

[HEIL PRESIDENT GOD]

23. GORILLA warfare?

Bush would be proud! Ook ook ook.... :)

[UL_Approved]

12. After the Civil War...

...we didn't handle it right. If Lincoln had not been assassinated, we may have had a better relationship and a better social climate, but I have my doubts. This country was founded by two groups: religious outcasts and gold diggers. The religious outcasts went north, and the gold diggers went south. In the end, we may have been TOO lenient on some parts of the south. Maybe we should have exiled some leaders or had them executed. Who knows?

[lgardengate]

13. Wasington,Jefferson,Adams,Franklyn etc The South!

Some were from Blue states but many where not.Also Many (Washington,Adams etc were Christians Who prayed and read the Bible and quoted it often.

[demnan]

14. Odd page

Not a single graphic? Doesn't look very professional to me. As far as the rant goes, well I guess somebody has to be blamed for the election. Foolishness like this will subside as the grieving process for the election subsides.

I'd still take Bill Clinton over the majority of Northern Democrats anyday. He can talk and connnect to people.

It's all a little more complicated than just, "the South is nothing but idiots".

[DS1]

15. Edited version for distribution

Kick the South out. We should have let them go when they wanted to leave. But no, we had to kill half a million people so they'd stay part of our special Union. Fighting for the right to keep slaves - yeah, those are states we want to keep.

And now what do we get? We're the Arrogant Northeast Liberal Elite? How about this for arrogant: the South is the Real America? The Authentic America. Really?

Cause we founded this country, thank you very much. Those Founding Fathers you keep going on and on about? All that stuff about what you think they meant by the Second Amendment giving you the right to keep your assault weapons in the glove compartment because you didn't bother to read the first half of the sentence? Who do you think those wig-wearing lacy-shirt sporting revolutionaries were? They were blue-staters, stupid. Boston? Philadelphia? New York? Hello? Think there might be a reason all the good monuments are up here in our backyard?

No, No. Get out. We're not letting you visit the Liberty Bell and Plymouth Rock anymore until you get over your real American selves and start respecting those other nine amendments. Who do you think those stripes on the flag are for? Nine are for blue states. And it would be 10 if those Vermonters had gotten their Subarus together and broken off from New York a little earlier. Get it? We started this, so don't get all uppity about how real you are you Johnny-come-lately "Oooooh I've been a state for almost a hundred years" crap. Get out.

Arrogant? You wanna talk about us Northeasterners being arrogant? What's more American than arrogance? Hmmm? Maybe horsies? I don't think so. Arrogance is the cornerstone of what it means to be American. And I wouldn't be so arrogant if I wasn't paying for your bridges, bucko.

All those Federal taxes you love to hate? It all comes from us and goes to you, so shut up and enjoy your Tennessee Valley Authority electricity and your fancy highways that we paid for. And the next time Florida gets hit by a hurricane you can come crying to us if you want to, but you're the ones who built on a swamp. "Let the Spanish keep it, it’s a craphole," we said, but you had to have your orange juice.

The next dude who says, "It’s your money, not the government's money" is gonna get their butt kicked. Nine of the ten states that get the most federal dollars and pay the least... can you guess? Go on, guess. That’s right, Billybob, they're red states. And eight of the ten states that receive the least and pay the most? It’s too easy, Jethro, they’re blue states. It’s not your money, it’s our money. What was that Real American Value you were spouting a minute ago? Self reliance? Try this for self reliance: buy your own stop signs.

Let’s talk about those values for a minute. You and your Southern values can kiss my butt because the blue states got the values over you Real Americans every day of the goddamn week. Which state do you think has the lowest divorce rate you marriage-hyping dingbats? Well? Can you guess? It’s Massachusetts, the center of the gay marriage universe. Yes, that’s right, the state you love to tie around the neck of anyone to the left of Strom Thurmond has the lowest divorce rate in the nation. Think that’s just some aberration? How about this: 9 of the 10 lowest divorce rates are blue states, and most are in the Northeast, where our values suck so bad. And where are the highest divorce rates? Care to guess? 10 of the top 10 are red-ass we're-so--moral states. And while Nevada is the worst, the Bible Belt is doing its part.

But two guys making out is going to ruin marriage for you? Yeah? Seems like you're ruining it pretty well on your own, you little runts. Oh, but that's ok because you go to church, right? I mean you do, right? Cause we get to hear about it every year at election time. Yes, we're fascinated by how you get up every Sunday morning and sing, and then you're towers of moral superiority. Yeah, that's a workable formula. Maybe us Northerners don't talk about religion as much as you because we're not so busy sinning, hmmm? Ever think of that, you self-righteous rednecks? No, you're too busy erecting giant stone tablets of the Ten Commandments in buildings paid for by the Northeast Liberal Elite. And who has the highest murder rates in the nation? It ain't us up here in the North, country boy!

Well this gravy train is over. Take your liberal-bashing, federal-tax-leaching, confederate-flag-waving, holier-than-thou, hypocritical garbage and shove it up your tailpipe.

And no, you can't have your convention in New York next time. Get out.

[Ripley]

17. Another day at DU, another South Bash.

How fun...can I join the bonfire? Oops, I'm a liberal in the South, I guess you'll just burn me at the stake too.

Why don't you look at a map of the votes. A lot more states outside the South voted Red.

[dbt]

18. Message from the South: Fuck the North, too.

:evilgrin:
dbt
Friendship, Arkansas

[truebrit71]

19. Fucking funny....

LMAO funny!!!

[cheezus]

20. we should have given the south 3/5 vote after the civil war

well, WHITE people anyway

[helnwhls]

21. the South is a hell of a lot more purple than the Northwest

don't ya'll wish we could make everyone who did not vote for Kerry the same color so it would be easier to hate them? maybe even hunt them down and kill them.



:wtf:

[HEIL PRESIDENT GOD]

22. Yeah, fuck Martin Luther King and all his efforts

Fuck all the black people who made the whole floodplain of the Mississippi and a swath of counties from central Alabama to DC blue.

I won't insult your intelligence by adding a sarcasm tag.

[secedeeconomically]

24. I could not have said it any better.

I agree 100% with every fucking word :) Those fucking redneck bastards deserve no compassion at all. They are hypocrites and ignorant, which is a bad combination. They all live with this pipe dream that the south will someday rise and conquer the infidels. What they need, is to be slapped back to reality. That we, the Blue states control all of the economical and technological wealth. We produce the innovations that drive this economy. If it wasn’t for their constant tax breaks they give companies, no one would move there.

I encourage others so secede from the south. Not politically, but rather economically. Stop giving your money to Florida based companies. That includes Florida orange juice and stop vacationing there. Stop purchasing Dell PC. Another good old boy Texas company. Once they are hurting financially and baby Jesus isn’t replenishing their bank accounts, I guarantee they will start singing a whole new tune.