A George Bush Soliloquy ( with apologies to William S.)

[KlatooBNikto]

To be or not to be---- what was the question?

I don't understand why people don't like my program to end all wars by starting more wars.It is like supply side economics, you see? The more tax cuts you give to rich folks, the more investment they make in China and India, and more tax revenues are created --- in China and India.They make more goods and software, so you can buy more trinkets at Walmart and more videogames.What more do we want?

I have a plan, unlike Senator Kerry, to get rid of all wars in the future.I think if the rest of the world looks like America all our problems would be solved. I am issuing a Presidential Directive that all people of the world should turn white on November 3. A job of this magnitude calls for real expertise and I have appointed Michael Jackson the Czar of the White Skin Program.In addition, those, like the Asian people who want nose jobs and eye jobs will get those free so their Americanization will be complete.After these basic tasks are completed, all the people of the world will be given compulsory classes to watch nonstop infomercials to watch for 48 hours during which they can pick and choose any items they like so they become true Americans.

The second step in my program is to make sure everyone in the world gets a chance to go to heaven with me.That means Jews, Hindus, Muslims and Buddhists will be forced to listen to Jerry Falwell and Pat Robertson so they can be born again like me.

When these two steps are done, the world will be well on its way to
becoming American.Those who have difficulty with English will be taught Mandarin, Japanese or Swahili or Swedish.

For those who find it difficult to eat sushi, a special McDonald's will be set up selling Big Macs.