The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 351

[top10]

The Top 10 Conservative Idiots, No. 351

September 8, 2008
Country Club First Edition

At the end of last week's Top 10 I said we'd be back to normal this week. I'm sorry to report that I lied. It turns out that the Republican National Convention generated such vast quantities of bullshit, I just didn't know where to begin, so this week please enjoy the Top 10 Conservative Idiots National Republican Convention Recap. For those of you who are still stuck with dial-up, I'm truly, truly sorry. You might want to make yourself a cup of coffee while this page loads.

Monday





Tuesday

















Wednesday

















Thursday














Back to normal next week, I promise! See you then...

-- EarlG

[firedupdem]

1. That was great! I can sleep now! n/t

[BayjanDem]

4. Hillarious

"I got nothing" ROTF!!!

[goose4739]

54. Top 10 Conservative Idiots

That's one of the reasons why I donate to DU. In fact, I just did again.

[Fenris]

2. Brilliant.

[Initech]

3. That was fucking hilarious.

[tomreedtoon]

5. Zombie Alfred Hitchcock????

Remember that the real Hitchcock tried to convince at least one of his leading ladies to have an affair with him (Tippi Hedren) and when she refused, he wrecked her career.

Funny that Palin will try to wreck the career of McCain, by giving him the fatal heart attack he's been courting all this time, and taking over the country.

[Vanje]

7. Really!?!!

I always thought Hitchcock was gay.

[MaineMike]

10. Hitchcock not gay.

Just British.

[tomreedtoon]

15. Naah. Just got a biography by a man names Spoto about Hitch.

Says that he was sexually repressed; he was a British Catholic. I think someone said "he thought everybody was doing something naughty behind every closed door...except him." That's why his latter movies contained a lot of tortured, raped and killed women, especially Frenzy.<\i> A truly screwed-up man.

[Lautremont]

27. Take everything in that Spoto biography with several huge grains of salt.

There are much more reputable Hitchcock biographies out there - Patrick McGilligan's for one.

And, on the subject of this thread: just seeing that parade of clowns angries up the blood! I was truly baffled to hear that the worst speech I've ever heard, delivered in the most annoying voice I've ever heard, was in fact a hit in some quarters. (That's Palin's I'm talking about.) Good speech bubble work!

[DUlover2909]

6. Great job this week! This journal is what brought me to DU in 2000.

[SQinAZ]

8. I wanted to laugh...really!

I wanted to laugh...but it was all so frickin TRUE to be very funny! Great job, though!

I especially liked this one:

[eggman61]

37. Bush's balloons

If you managed to list all of Bush's failures in this way, you'd have more balloons than the actual convention.

[Vickers]

9. Humor and despair are kissing cousins.

Well done, chief.

[krispos42]

11. And rightclick....

properties, copy all, cancel, switch to Photobucket, create new album "Morans", import from web URL, paste, upload, and.... violá





Beautiful.

[VeggieTart]

18. Grammar and Punctuation cop here

Glad to know I'm not the only person who noticed some dodo misspelled "maverick." Considering McCain's still trying to sell himself as one, you'd think they'd have been clued in by now. And Cindy McCain so looked like an aging trophy wife--complete with the gilding. Yikes!

[wizstars]

22. Do we need Dan Quayle to help this guy speell?

(error intentional)

[cosmic _mind]

12. great job, thanks!

Thanks for that recap of the convention - I couldn't stomach the thought of watching it, but I'm sure your version is a lot more fun! They should have just called it the Conservative Idiots Convention...

[SeattleGirl]

13. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

Priceless, EarlG! Abso-fucking-lutely PRICELESS!!

[Plucketeer]

14. Great stuff

as ALWAYS!!!

[XanaDUer]

16. Best one yet! Why can't Repukes spell?

Nt.

[pipi_k]

26. Because it would make them look like

they graduated from the sixth grade.

Too "liberal elitist" for them, doncha know....

[DCKit]

17. A lot of people are going to start Monday on a high note.

You're a real hero EarlG.

[DeeDeeNY]

19. Don't forget Rudy mentioned 9/11!

[Canuckistanian]

29. That's always assumed n/t

[happygoluckytoyou]

20. glad the old white guy got some eye candy... and as a republican, im glad it turned out to be female

and over 14

[pipi_k]

24. and

human.


er...maybe.

[Cassandra]

21. The guy with the Drill Here hat...

we could try but that is a dry hole.

[GTurck]

23. So...

on point it makes me want to cry in frustration.

[DinahMoeHum]

25. Heh heh, all the white monkeys, all in a row, flinging poo poo to and fro. . .

[nxylas]

28. Best summary of the Palin speech I've ever seen

"Moose"
"YAAAAYYY!!"

Priceless.

[Javaman]

30. Brilliant as always!!! nt

[maple25]

31. OMG

I laughed so hard I started to cry. I had to tell my office mate that my grandma just died and that I have problems dealing with my emotions. Thanks so much for the Monday cheer.

[agtcovert]

32. Moose.

[ElboRuum]

39. Hockey.

Moose. Hockey. Moosehockey! It's like moose-poop, only BETTER.

[La Lioness Priyanka]

33. either this is the best one yet or i just really like cartoons

or both!!!

go earlg!!!!!

[BRB_TheFireball]

34. "86% of the media just ejaculated"

Thanks a lot for making me snarf soda out of my nose, Earl. You owe me a new keyboard... LOL!

[nam78_two]

35. Outstanding-this one should be a sticky

Love the Palin ones "Moose" "YAAAAAAAYYYYYYYYYY!", "Community service" "BOOOOOOOOO"...

[libodem]

36. Way too funny!

That's just what I needed.

[mikelgb]

38. omg rotflol:

[diane in sf]

40. Thank you EarlG--I really enjoyed this, you ought to put it out in book format

I'd buy one as a fundraiser.

[Redstone]

41. Good Lord, you've actually outdone yourself. I'd never have thought it possible, but

there it is. Possibly the best TTCI ever.

Redstone

[Zuiderelle]

42. That's the best RNC coverage I've seen!

[FatherTime1408]

43. THAT. WAS. WONDERFUL!! HAahahahahahahaaa!!

[jcla]

44. My favorite is

"Better watch your back, old man."
Kudos, Earl, kudos! Best coverage of the Rethuglicant Convention ever!

[nini]

45. Holy crap.. that was AWESOME

[Frisbee]

46. K^R! n/t

[tigereye]

47. that was hilarious!

[ObamaKerryDem]

48. LMFAO!!!!!1

Best summary of that convention yet.

Great stuff!

[sasori]

49. that is brilliant!...

...MOOSE!That is fricking hilarious.I am bookmarking this gem.K&R!!!

[Demeter]

50. Face It: You Were Born to Do This, EarlG

When somebody has that much fun, it isn't work, it's a calling.....

[mascarax]

51. Wow - thank you!

I think I have desktop images for awhile now...it's hard to choose.

[Ronbeaux]

52. Excellent!

First time poster but this is the weekly entry that brought me to DU also! Great work, as always, Earl!

[awoke_in_2003]

59. Welcome

it is what brought me here, too.

[Maestro]

53. Even better than usual.

You need to moonlight as a writer for The Daily Show or Colbert Report!

[stlsaxman]

55. that was totally amazing!!!

you ROCK, EarlG!

[underpants]

56. A great accompanying piece by Leonard Pitts

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.ph...

[mainegreen]

57. I know I'm late to the party, but seriously, best top ten EVAH!

It's funny because it's true!

[daggahead]

58. `member when Gore was criticized for looking a bit too orange?

That was during the 2000 debates.

Sleepy Fred looked just as bad and the Cons have been saying that Sleepy gave his best speech ever.

I don't hate Republicans. I just haven't had the right brain injury required to understand them.

[lame54]

60. Here is the video for this week's Top 10 Conservative Idiots...

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.ph...

[trthnd4jstc]

61. Thanks, you made that nightmare a hell of a lot better, this time around.

I like the fellow telling Wolf Blitzer that 86% of the Media just ejaculated. Funny!

[SQinAZ]

62. It's next week...

It's next week, so where are the pearls of wisdom from Earl G? He said he would be back this week, and I pray that he is okay. Did I miss something? I need my weekly read, and he pulls it all together so well.

[LeftyMom]

63. He's not feeling well, so he's talking the week off.

He also said not to be surprised if the Top Ten goes on hiatus soon, his wife's about to have their first baby.

[SQinAZ]

64. Thank you!

I am happy to hear the Earl G is just ill, and hasn't been spirited off in the middle of the night , a la the KGB.

And I hope the babe is born healthy and happy, and mom is healthy and happy, too! (Dad doesn't get too much credit other than being a coach and having sympathy pains. Sorry, Earl G.)