The Frumerian Candidate

[Miss Authoritiva]

The Frumerian Candidate
By Grace Nearing @ Scriptoids


It’s not that I genuinely respect or magnanimously tolerate other people’s religions. It’s just that I am, very politely, totally indifferent. As long as adherents keep the inquisitions, crusades, jihads, slaughter of innocents, and oppression and subjugation of women and indigenous peoples to the bare minimum, I turn a secular sunglassed eye to the proceedings.

So if some people want to go all Jesuit, Unitarian, Trinitarian, Rastafarian, or Santeria over a Romney the Mormon versus Huckabee the Southern Baptist sperm-sibling debate regarding Jesus and Lucifer, I just switch the input line from CATV to DVD and watch some episodes of AbFab and The Young Ones until the media moves on to something else.

I have to admit, though, that I would really like to see a Frumerian run for president. Since there aren’t too many Frumerians to begin with, and fewer still actually living in the United States, and even fewer (probably none) with the natural born citizenship status needed to run, the odds of a practicing Frumerian running for president are virtually nonexistent.

Why a Frumerian? Because Frumerians are cargo cultists, “cargo” being really cool technology and abundant stuff. Almost all Americans are cargo cultists too, but we’re in really heavy denial about it....

Continued at The Frumerian Candidate