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Are Your “Elected Officials” Defective?

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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 06:52 PM
Original message
Are Your “Elected Officials” Defective?
Are Your “Elected Officials” Defective?
Saturday, 17 November 2007
by Tom Chartier


“This happy nation will be better governed for the next weeks than it has been all the rest of the year. There will be no Parliament, no ministers and no permanent heads in London, and everything will go well.”
- On his departure for a holiday, Sir William Harcourt to the Queen’ secretary, September 22, 1893 - {A.G. Gardiner, The Life of Sir William Harcourt, London: Constable, 1905, Vol. 2, p 242}


We are all too familiar with the usual flaws in the product: too many noxious fumes, snake oil potions and a lousy service department. We know that the product works for us about half the time… if we’re lucky. The other “half,” the product spends lining its pockets. Time to face the fact: Our “elected officials” perform about as well as that anatomical enhancing device from K-Cheat as advertised on late night TV.

I don’t know about you, but I’m fed up! We are not alone. Customer approval is at an all time low. I am beginning to believe that some of the time, these “elected” personages are… to sugar coat it… mentally defective.

Ok, I stand corrected: Most of the time.

Consider some of what “they” believe: a) An acceptable nominee for Attorney General is one who doesn’t know if waterboarding is torture; b) Money grows on trees… trees in China; c) A President who thinks that the best way to prevent Nuclear Armageddon is to… threaten a Nuclear Armageddon.

I mean, is this product even safe? Most people would agree that the things this crowd endorses are hazardous. Time for some good old fashioned ‘Merican litigation! I’m calling the highly recommended law firm of Dewey, Cheatem and Howe! Unfortunately, they seem to be in the license plate manufacturing business these days. Out come the Yellow Pages; my fingers zip to Product Liability Lawyers. Presto Bingo there’s plenty to pick from. I think I have a strong case. And Philadelphia attorney Andrew J. Stern agrees with me: “It could be a fluke. But, in general, people are much more safety conscious... When jurors have evidence there are defective conditions not being addressed, they have no tolerance.”

See, any jury would convict and award substantial damages! Trouble is, they pardon their own.

These people are dangerous. And stupid. Some don’t even know how to properly use a public toilet! I tell you; there are more than just a few screws loose in Congress.

You want to bet our elected officials chewed on their toys (also from China) and paid for their college by working part time jobs in hat factories? Ah, there’s nothing like a good dose of mercury!

more... :rofl:

http://www.atlanticfreepress.com/content/view/2857/81/
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Richard Steele Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:02 PM
Response to Original message
1. K&R
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hisownpetard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:12 PM
Response to Original message
2. Even though I've been selective, I've detected that the officials elected are often
defective but nonetheless remain protected from being rejected by other Republicans,
to whom I spew every form of invective.
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:15 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. You're just a rhymin' fool, aren't ya?
:rofl: :hi: :thumbsup:
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hisownpetard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:18 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Help me!!!! I've had waaaaaaay too much caffeine and I can't stop posting!!!!!!
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:20 PM
Response to Reply #4
5. I stop after two big cups in the a.m.
What's MY excuse? :D It's addicting, I tell ya. And I do appreciate your rhyming!
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hisownpetard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:30 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. It is really addictive - and I have the hips to prove it! nt
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AndyTiedye Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:43 PM
Response to Original message
7. One of Our Senators Was Replaced by a Pod-Person
She just hasn't been herself since Bush** took her up on Air Force 1.

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hisownpetard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 07:45 PM
Response to Reply #7
8. She's gone, and has been replaced by a podperson with an Andrews Sisters wig.
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Nov-17-07 11:43 PM
Response to Reply #8
9. This thread started out as 'serious' but it went downhill. I loved this
blog/article.

Andrews Sisters wig? :spray:
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hisownpetard Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Nov-18-07 10:09 AM
Response to Reply #9
11. Oof. My bad. Sowwy!
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babylonsister Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Nov-18-07 01:30 AM
Response to Original message
10. I must be 'sick' because this was funny/serious. No comments, at all? nt
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