Cerberus Likely Buyer of Chrysler

[Bozita]

Source: Fox News, Detroit

Breaking news. Sale will be announced tomorrow.

from the link:

Cerberus Likely Buyer of Chrysler
Cerberus Capital Management LP likely will be the winning bidder to buy Chrysler Group from DaimlerChrysler AG, and an announcement could come as early as Monday, a company official told The Associated Press on Sunday.

Read more: http://www.myfoxdetroit.com/myfox /

---

Isn't that Dan Quayle and friends?

[Colobo]

1. Yep, Dan Quayle.

[Frank Cannon]

22. You gotta be kidding me. Dan Quayle??!!

"Cerberus also has former Vice President Dan Quayle as an adviser."

Nothing like a company named after a three-headed dog-serpent demon from hell and advised by--of all people--Dan Freaking Quayle.

I wouldn't have Dan Quayle advise me on how to screw in a light bulb, for crying out loud. This has got to be some kind of joke.

[damntexdem]

25. No, it sounds just about right for ...

American automakers nowadays!

[Book Lover]

2. Detroit News Online links here

http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070...

Cerberus has agreement to buy Chrysler

Cerberus Capital Management has reached agreement to buy the Chrysler Group in what would be a landmark acquisition of a major automaker by a private-equity firm, according to people close to the sale process.

The deal follows marathon negotiations between New York-based Cerberus and DaimlerChrysler AG, and is expected to be formally announced as soon as Monday.

DaimlerChrysler is said to have chosen Cerberus over bids by rival private-equity giant Blackstone Group and Canadian auto supplier Magna International Inc.

The sale agreement with Cerberus is expected to be contingent on final terms to be negotiated with DaimlerChrysler. No sale price was immediately known

<etc>

and

http://www.detnews.com/apps/pbcs.dll/article?AID=/20070...

A look at Cerberus

Cerberus Capital Management LP, one of the nation's leading private-equity firms, bought a majority interest in mortgage and lending business GMAC last year for $7.4 billion.

New York-based Cerberus -- led by former Chrysler chief operating officer Wolfgang Bernhard -- also recently agreed to buy the assets of Tower Automotive, a bankrupt supplier in Novi, for $1 billion.

Bernhard helped lead Chrysler's last comeback during his tenure as chief operating officer from 2001 to 2004.
<snip>

Cerberus first auto acquisition was GDX Automotive, one of the world's biggest suppliers of automotive sealing products. The News recently reported that GDX may be broken up or sold.

[liberal N proud]

3. CBS reporting the same just now on evening news

Anyone know anything about Cerberus?

[CJCRANE]

5. Here you go...

"In Greek mythology, Cerberus or Kerberos (Greek Κέρβερος, Kerberos, "demon of the pit") was the hound of Hades, a monstrous three-headed dog (sometimes said to have 50 or 100 heads) with a snake for a tail; he was also seen with a dragons tail and serpentine mane".

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cerberus

[liberal N proud]

8. So will this be the new emblem on Chrysler cars?

[B3Nut]

19. Hey! That's Hagrid's dog Fluffy!

Does this mean we geeks can call Kerberos authentication Fluffy authentication?

Todd in Cheesecurdistan

[Ian David]

4. Announcing the new Chrysler Potatoe. n/t

[Bozita]

6. the Idahoe?

[Dover]

7. Cerberus...perfect. The mythological 3-headed dog that guarded the gates to HELL.

Meaning: "Demon of the Pit"

Had to be a rightwing company...

[SpiralHawk]

9. Cerebrus: A perfectly lovely "Christian" image for republicons to worship

republicon so-called "christians" are into some damn strange stuff,
I mean, Skull & Boner occult cabals for Commander AWOL, and now this
three-headed monstrosity for
republcon intellectual heavyweight Danny POTATOE BOY Quayle & his allied republicon cronies.

WTF ????

[damntexdem]

26. They'll have to chane that image:

make the snake tails into gasoline hoses coming out of Fluffy's ass.

[xchrom]

10. yikes -- dan quayle again -- ya gotta feel sorry for the

workers at chrysler -- cause it's gonna be an all out slash and burn and sell again now.

[Rydz777]

11. The Chrysler plants will soon be crated up and on their

way to China. The cars will then reappear in the USA as the Kung Po Plymouth and the Seventh Happiness Dodge.

[Penndems]

12. It looks like Lee Iacocca needs to stage a comeback

What does an investment consortium know about running one of the Big Three automakers? Chrysler needs somebody at the helm who has experience from the ground up in the car business - not a group of people looking to expand their portfolio.

The American automobile industry is in real danger of being extinct.

[alfredo]

21. GM put a bean counter in charge and it nearly killed GM

Watch Michael Moore's "Roger and Me."

An auto company needs a person in charge that knows and loves automobiles. Sure, you need good management, but you also need passion and vision. Chrysler needs a Steve Jobs type of visionary and a team of Jonathan Ives to make his vision real.

[Bozita]

13. WSJ: "Deal would allow the German auto maker to shed $18 billion in retirement and health-care liabi

I smell bankruptcy. Then Daimler won't have to pay. Neither will Cerberus.


http://online.wsj.com/public/us

As of 11:25:00 PM EDT Sun, May 13, 2007

DAIMLERCHRYSLER IS EXPECTED to announce a deal to sell a controlling stake in Chrysler to Cerberus. The proposed deal would allow the German auto maker to shed $18 billion in retirement and health-care liabilities.  11:14 p.m.

[geomon666]

14. Nice...

Not only do they get to fuck over current workers and shareholders but the loyal workers that spent 20 or more years and are now retired get a nice big kick in the ass and into the grave.

[Psephos]

29. There's another party to the screwing of the workers

All those who don't buy cars made by American labor.

Cuz it's a progressive fashion statement, donchaknow?

Meanwhile, Cerberus in ascension is not good news.

[lithiumbomb]

15. Rover Redux

If you want an idea of what's going to happen over the next few years, take a look at what happened to Rover in the UK. The profitable brands were broken off (Land Rover to Ford, Mini turned into its own brand and retained by BMW), the rest of the company flailed along for a while and then the tooling for their horribly out of date models was sold and carted off to China. Chrysler Group has survived due to the big cash infusion from the parent DamilerChrysler company. When that's gone, I don't see how they can last another 10 years. Jeep is the most valuable brand they have. I bet it will be sold off for cash early on in the death spiral.

[razzleberry]

16. does the 'Dodge' brand, have any value?

everybody seems to make trucks, these days.

so does anyone need another brand?

[lithiumbomb]

17. well some

Personally I think Jeep is their most valuable brand. Everyone around the world knows what a Jeep is. After that is probably Chrysler, which is also a worldwide brand to a certain extent. Dodge trucks have a loyal following and it's a good product but have always been a 3rd tier truck after Ford and GM offerings. With that market softening up, who knows.

Here are the good individual products in Chrysler's portfolio:
Jeep - not the latest soft roaders (they're just poorly executed) but the proper 4wd vehicles that Jeep built its reputation on. Wrangler and Grand Cherokee.

Chrysler - the 300 is relatively popular and has a presence in Europe. However I'm not sure they have a second act as it's getting a bit dated. Also uses a lot of Mercedes parts. The platform has spawned a number of models but I'm not sure they're all savable.

Dodge/Chrysler - The minivan line. It's been their most popular vehicle for over 20 years.

Dodge/Freightliner Sprinter van - Commercial van, rebadged Mercedes. Could easily be pulled from Dodge dealers and sold only as a Freightliner in this country. I wouldn't consider this vehicle a part of the Chrysler package.

And, that's it. The rest of their product line could vanish and no one would notice.

[razzleberry]

20. largely agree .n/t

[TankLV]

28. Chrysler 300 - beautiful design - mechanical CRAP.

worst piece of mechanics to come about in years...

Beautifully packaged shit...

Just like the repuke party...

[Tesha]

18. "Dodge" isn't a brand, it's a warning!

> does the 'Dodge' brand, have any value?

"Dodge" isn't a brand, it's a warning!

The Tesha family has owned two Dodge products
(full disclosure: One was "Plymouth" branded,
cue Dean Martin...) and there won't *EVER*
be a third. They simply have no quality
at all and are clearly not engineered for
the long run that modern cars are expected
to offer.

Tesha

[damntexdem]

27. Caravan has been a good car.

Uses too much gas, but better than a SUV -- and an actual car on a car chassis.

[musiclawyer]

23. Chrysler will be liquidated

I swear I heard one of the talking heads on morning news say that the sale would result in "elimination" of Chrysler. I was getting ready for work and can't be sure which network this was on. But I heard it.

[damntexdem]

24. Well, I thought that Chrysler might be on the road to hell, but ...

I didn't think it would be bought up by the denizens.