Reply #20: Hello Gregorian!

[BlancheSplanchnik]

Yes, it's the biggest elephant in the room, I'd say.

I am sooo on the same page as you.

In my department at work, we're mostly women, and there's a large number who are of childbearing age. The default mentality, the coo-fests, the nearly universal encouragement of total submersion in SELF ABSORBED urges is one I separate myself from as much as possible, since I don't fake that kind of emotion very well. General consensus is I'm a rotten old bizatch! *snort*

Back when I was of the proper age, I went through a brief time of wanting to get pregs. But I thank all that is sacred that it didn't happen, since my motivation was completely self-absorbed: I wanted to be a part of the club, I wanted the attention, I wanted to be that special, special princess (unique and special like every single other one of them--billions and billions of very special mommeez), who is fussed over at parties and the passive recipient of cooing and attention simply for carrying out a bodily function!

Rarely does anyone stop and really understand the fact that the period of sparkly fantasy lasts about as long as a used placenta dropped on a desert rock at midday!

Babymaking is really about romanticized fantasies and giving oneself up to biology--sad for women, since many who choose to give in to the biological imperative give UP their individuality, their identity, their creativity, their interests, careers, their unique selves in exchange for a thankless existence of drudgery, mindless rule-enforcement, endless repetitive chores, submission and sacrifice to broods of completely self-centered demand-machines. I've met many haggard women whose misery from decades of self-abnegation simmered mightily under the lead weight of guilty obligation. (Have you ever heard the refrain, "Well, I was starting XYZ career and really loved it, but then the kids came...."? Yeah, like they came of their own volition, you had nothing to do with it :eyes: )

For most, it is most certainly NOT about imagining taking on the 30 year or more responsibility to nurture a life. The broodmares will protest to the ends of the earth how they crave raising and guiding new life, etc etc., but if that were really so, they would adopt, since there are warehouses full of souls in dire need.

I do know a few parents who ARE outstanding in their roles, but still---why the necessity to produce yet another burden on the planet, rather than take those skills and give them where there is true need? Take truly responsible, courageous and compassionate action? Like, adopt an older child, or a non-white one, or a disabled one, for example.

Well, Gregorian, hahah.....looks like finding a kindred soul set me off on a little spontaneous combustion here; next time I'll tell ya how I REALLY feel!!! :rofl: !!! Haa, I could have gone on longer, too! :P

I guess this is what happens when there's something that needs to get talked about but social pressure to shut up and grin stupidly is overwhelming!! So feel free to drop me a line anytime :hi: