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Reply #4: Breaking news: Purity Bowls cause global warming [View All]

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ChairmanAgnostic Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Thu Apr-14-11 04:55 AM
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4. Breaking news: Purity Bowls cause global warming
A study by the Quazimodo Chair of Abstinence Studies, of the East Chicago University reveals that abstinence parties, in which fathers receive ownership pledges over their dsughters' vaginas, turn out to greatly increase energy use and global warming.

Because the rates of STD transmission are so much greater among the pledged teens, increased demands on medical services, normally in secret, even clandestine locations (like Planned Parenthood, as part of the 10% of their non abortion services) force female health care facilities to remain open at odd hours, long after normal business hours.

Additionally, efforts to cure the STDs through prayer, also increase energy use at religious centers like baptist and evangelical churches.
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