Reply #110: I'll be honest

[GaYellowDawg]

I wanted to subject the bullies to everything I was subjected to so that they would know how bad I felt. I didn't want them to die. I wanted them to hurt as badly as I did. I wanted to beat the living crap out of them but couldn't muster the courage and hated myself for it.

But you could have put a gun in my hands when I was the maddest and put the worst tormentor on his knees in front of me and I would never have pulled the trigger. I have always known I couldn't ever kill anyone for myself. I really want to emphasize that I'm not condemning you, just that I thought a little differently!

As for the worst tormentor, I've recently heard about him. He's recently divorced and he's so miserable and angry that he has no friends and his family largely avoids him. I would have thought that would make me happy but I actually thought it was kind of a shame.

Again, though, I'm glad you're in good shape now. I hope you continue to prosper and you are so happy that all your former bullies envy you.