Reply #51: I have met people who can give me what I want

[Juche]

I am extremely self absorbed (and arrogant, since we are on the subjet), but I don't think I am needy per se. What I'm saying is this, for all intents and purposes. There are some people on this planet who have the experience, maturity and competence that I know if something really, really bad happens to me and I cannot take care of myself, that they will be both willing and able to help. I felt like nobody was both willing and able to help me when I was a teenager in a meaningful way.

I've found people like that though. Usually they are liberals in their 50s and 60s who have had personal crisis's (family problems, etc) and who have struggled with their own demons and overcome them. However I'm not necessarily looking to them to take care of me, I am just looking to know they will be competent to step in if I need it. And I do the same for them.

A friend of mine on another board who is 66 recently started having memory problems and she was afraid it was Alzheimer's. So I dug up a bunch of info on Alzheimer's (early detection tools, various ways to slow progression, cutting edge research to look into, supplements and lifestyle changes that cut the risk, etc) and gave it to her to read. It is tit for tat. If I had a severe mental illness she'd step in to protect me. And if she is descending into Alzheimer's I will step in to protect her. I did not ignore her fears, and I didn't make fun of her for having memory problems. I took her seriously and made concrete steps as her friend to help protect her. And I know she'd do the same for me. If I was in a living hell, she wouldn't just feel sorry for me for a few seconds and then walk away. She'd make concrete efforts to protect me.

Another person was a woman in her 70s at a church. All she did was listen to me for 20 minutes, but it really meant a lot to me and I'll never forget it. I'm not asking people to babysit me or solve all my problems for me. I'm asking them to not give up w/o a fight when I need help, or to abandon me when I lose social status.

Anyway, I do appreciate the honest responses.