Reply #159: Right. You're the only normal one around here, and everyone else on DU is

[RandomKoolzip]

some touchy-feely hyper-emotional freak with no sense of judgment. 99% of the world outside of DU thanks your for your loyal adherence to logic, sanity, and sobriety, since, without you, 99% of all people on DU would have no idea how to dress themselves in the morning. Thanks for setting us all straight, Mr. flinty clear-eyed truth-teller! Your simple, unvarnished truth recognizes no sense of decorum, timing, or posting etiquette; all those things are MERE BUGABOOS keeping you from delivering the TRUTH to us 1%ers who will someday recognize how hard you have worked to lead us out of the darkness! The next time a DU mourns the loss of her pet cat, I'm sure you'll be there, berating her (righteously, and with capitalized initials in the subject line) about how "stupid" it was to buy a cat, knowing full well how cats lead shorter lives than humans. And can you do me a favor? The next time a DUer posts about doing something kind for someone less fortunate, can you PLEASE be there, Caps in Hand, ready to drop some ill fresh dope knowledge on her about how absolutely STUPID her actions were? Because I'm sure she'll need to be told, in the bluntest language possible, just how wrong-headed she is in following her social conscience. I'd expect nothing less from you - if you were to display any idea of when NOT to post inappropriate shit, or to exhibit any visible tact or conscience yourself, or even a trace of compassion...then our trust in YOU, our national rational superhero would be DESTROYED! After all, you're the only thing keeping 99% of us from homelessness, disease, or poking ourselves in the eye with sharp sticks.

And while you're at it, go piss up 99% of a goddamn flagpole.