Reply #6: No flame here but a different perspective....

[FedUpWithIt All]

My daughter is 14. She has two close male friends.

One of the boys has developed a crush on me. He is a shy boy and i do not feel uncomfortable with the way he feels. It is a harmless part of growing up. He simply gets flustered when i am around. The other boy originally found out that suggesting that i am "hot" would get a funny response from my daughter and a bit of male jest between him and his male friend. Somehow my comfort level changed with this boy's comment. The use of the word "hot" from a 15 yr old boy made me extremely uncomfortable. It is different somehow.

The reason i mentioned these boys was to ask whether this discussion is getting a false result because of the fact that the damage is already done? Does perspective change when the situation is looked at from the other end? Surely, none of the responders of the poll are suggesting that a woman respond when an adolescent makes an advance. Do the assertions that no lasting damage would be done to a boy in a case like the LaFave case still apply when one is looking at a scenario from this angle? If it does not then maybe we should ask why. Perhaps, it is because in a situation that has already occurred is safe to dissect against the backdrop of fantasy. Whereas one that has not, the true realities of the implications arise.

I have been reading the poll thread you started. I remember when the case first was revealed. Around that time there was another case with very similar circumstances save one detail...the teacher in that case was not physically attractive. Men, who on the one hand were declaring their desire for a similar opportunity in the adolescent years with someone like LaFave, immediately decried the trauma to the young boy in the other case. There were calls for the "ugly" woman's imprisonment. THIS is the problem with this type of situation. The double standard in not so much one of male vrs. female but of something more...i dunno, uglier.


Edited for clarity. Very tired. :boring: