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Reply #5: I think like everything, [View All]

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Heddi Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Jun-28-05 06:30 PM
Response to Original message
5. I think like everything,
the "media" (And when I say "Media", I mean everything from advertising, news, print, videos, music, movies, TV shows, etc) strives to portray the "Unobtainable Reality".

Even if a movie shows a woman working as a cashier, making $2.15 an hour plus tips, she STILL lives in a decent house in a decent neighborhood, has a decent car, wears decent clothes, tons of beautiful friends, no facial blemishes or bad hair, and STILL has the money to socialize at bars and restaurants---an unobtainable reality for many working-class poor. I remember when I was a waitress, making $2.15 an hour plus tips, I was in my mid 20's, living in a slum in the ghetto, wearing clothes I'd been squeezing myself into since High School, not enough underwear, not enough money to do clothes, DEFINITELY not enough money to go out and so such frivilous things as go to a bar or eat at a restaurant.

I grew up very poor. My mom was a single parent, we lived in a trailer that by all rights should have been condemned because it had holes in the floor, infested with roaches, etc. She often worked 2+ jobs PLUS owed her soul to small time loan companies just to make ends meet. We had no phone, no cable, and all of my clothes were hand-me-downs.

I remember watching "Pretty in Pink"--classic tale of the poor girl who hooks up with the rich boy. Only, for being so poor, Molly Ringwald certainly had a nice house (not a hovel), had nice clothes (not hand-me-downs donated by the church up the street), had a 2 bedroom house, a large room, a car....

I never felt that *MY* reality (and by proxy, the reality of MILLIONS of adults & children in this country) was ever accurately portrayed by the Media. Even if you were poor, you were never *that* poor unless the movie was about blacks living in the ghetto...and even then, their hovels and shanty shacks were much nicer than any shanty *I* ever lived in.

I remember when "Roseanne" came on TV--finally, a show that kind of captured my reality, but again, not really because it was a 2 parent household, 2 story house, and they had things. No trailer, no roaches, no holes in the floor, no plastic on the windows in the wintertime to keep the cold out.

I grew up always feeling like I was on the outside of society. THe area I lived in was very impoverished, so 99% of the people I grew up in were either in the same situation as I, or one slightly better or slightly worse. Even with their influence, I still felt as if *I* was a nobody since NO ONE took the time to see what REAL poverty was like and portray it accurately and without stereotypes or 'rags to riches' ending where everyone hugs on the porch and life goes on peachy-keen.

Even now, as an adult who lives a fairly affluent life (and by affluent, I mean that I want for nothing, am financially stable, and don't have holes in the floor, even though technically I live at the poverty level by census standards), I still don't see realistic portrayals of REAL families, of REAL people who live in not so idyllic situations.

This really doesn't have shit to do with your post :) about showing 'real' women, other than the fact that the media rarely shows anything 'real' or obtainable. Even IF the woman has her own business (which is good), she can't be dumpy or fat or have bad hair. She has to HAVE IT ALL, which just isn't REALITY.

If the media didn't show constantly the Unobtainable Reality, then we would have nothing to strive for (in their eyes). They would have nothing to market to us if we were perfectly happy with our station in life. Why would we buy X product if we felt TRULY that we were content without it?

So they have to show the unobtainable reality. They have to always make it seem that there is SOMEONE out there who, in one way or another, has it BETTER than you, and that YOU can obtain that only if you try hard, work hard, and by all means, BUY BUY BUY and STRIVE STRIVE STRIVE.
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  -Why do we see so few working class women portrayed? ccbombs  Jun-28-05 04:19 PM   #0 
  - Don't watch enough movies to comment but I am thinking that movies  efhmc   Jun-28-05 04:34 PM   #1 
  - Oh yeah there are movies like that  ccbombs   Jun-28-05 04:45 PM   #2 
     - I liked that movie. What was the second one like.?  efhmc   Jun-28-05 04:55 PM   #3 
  - It's the same reason most blacks  Warpy   Jun-28-05 06:07 PM   #4 
  - Roseanne was a rarity  ccbombs   Jun-28-05 09:38 PM   #8 
  - I think like everything,  Heddi   Jun-28-05 06:30 PM   #5 
  - Wonderful story, wonderful post, wonderful you. Thanks for sharing some  efhmc   Jun-28-05 06:54 PM   #6 
  - Thanks yourself  Heddi   Jun-28-05 07:47 PM   #7 
  - No! Your post has everything to do with mine!  ccbombs   Jun-28-05 09:59 PM   #9 
  - Believe it or not, Japanese TV is more realistic in that respect  Lydia Leftcoast   Jun-30-05 11:52 AM   #50 
  - Great post.  raccoon   Oct-31-05 02:39 PM   #55 
  - Grace under Fire  lwfern   Jun-28-05 10:26 PM   #10 
  - Thats another one but it's not on anymore. n/t  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 12:19 AM   #13 
  - Are you kidding?  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-28-05 11:00 PM   #11 
  - Wow! What an impressive list of modern shows  Heddi   Jun-28-05 11:27 PM   #12 
  - Oh  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 08:26 AM   #15 
     - Well I suppose the same could be said for racial minorities  Heddi   Jun-29-05 01:29 PM   #20 
        - You're absolutely correct  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 02:23 PM   #21 
        - You honestly don't think you're condescending?  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 03:00 PM   #23 
        - As intended  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 03:16 PM   #24 
           - I did read that book  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 06:54 PM   #31 
              - Escapism  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 07:03 PM   #32 
                 - So where do dramas fit in your entertainment-only theory?  lukasahero   Jun-30-05 09:24 AM   #41 
                    - I don't understand your question, sorry  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-30-05 11:11 AM   #47 
                       - But earlier you said "there's not much that's entertaining about poverty"  lukasahero   Jun-30-05 11:30 AM   #49 
        - To the contrary, I don't dislike you at all  Heddi   Jun-29-05 05:04 PM   #27 
           - So,  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 05:36 PM   #28 
              - I knew you would ask to see such posts  Heddi   Jun-29-05 08:25 PM   #33 
              - great post, thanks, Heddi!  spooky3   Jun-29-05 08:30 PM   #34 
              - You do not come across as harsh  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 08:48 PM   #35 
                 - I feel this, again, is a wasted effort  Heddi   Jun-29-05 09:30 PM   #36 
              - Regarding "you seem to be dismissive of those of us who take offense"  lukasahero   Jun-30-05 10:46 AM   #44 
                 - Yowza!  ccbombs   Jun-30-05 11:03 AM   #46 
        - Sometimes people who post on this site  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 02:56 PM   #22 
           - "it affects my self-image"  Finder   Jun-29-05 03:17 PM   #25 
              - I found this to be the case myself as well  Heddi   Jun-29-05 04:55 PM   #26 
              - I wish I were immune!  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 06:30 PM   #30 
              - "Being feminists we should be immune."  lukasahero   Jun-30-05 09:48 AM   #42 
                 - I agree, we must discuss how to change it....  Finder   Jun-30-05 10:18 AM   #43 
                 - I would like to agree that seeing "their less than perfect mothers" etc  lukasahero   Jun-30-05 02:47 PM   #52 
                    - Good points...  Finder   Jun-30-05 03:30 PM   #53 
                       - Yes, the situation has improved but it has a long way to go  lukasahero   Jul-01-05 07:19 AM   #54 
                 - "Get over it"...... Aaargh!!  ccbombs   Jun-30-05 11:18 AM   #48 
  - None of them are on anymore  ccbombs   Jun-29-05 12:23 AM   #14 
  - I think  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 08:29 AM   #16 
     - Deleted message  Name removed   Jun-29-05 01:03 PM   #18 
     - How the hell can you think for one SECOND....  chicaloca   Jun-29-05 05:42 PM   #29 
        - We live in different worlds  OldLeftieLawyer   Jun-29-05 09:48 PM   #37 
        - Okay  ccbombs   Jun-30-05 01:21 AM   #38 
        - well, I'm sorry...  chicaloca   Jun-30-05 11:02 AM   #45 
        - Once again  ccbombs   Jun-30-05 02:01 AM   #39 
           - Lack of perspective, perhaps...?  Finder   Jun-30-05 08:22 AM   #40 
  - I'm seeing the "we're only giving people what they want" excuse  Lydia Leftcoast   Jun-30-05 12:10 PM   #51 
  - I don't watch TV but here are a few...  Finder   Jun-29-05 09:08 AM   #17 
  - Deleted message  Name removed   Jun-29-05 01:08 PM   #19 
  - for ca 4 years I watched many soaps ....... very few women were  bobbieinok   Nov-07-05 02:14 AM   #56 
 

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