Reply #4: Of Flakes and Fears

[FirstLight]

well I know the friend that pissed me off, has been using her turmoil as the grounds to be a 'committmentphobe' (HER word!)

i think that was the last straw, actually, i just got tired of hearing that.

How strong do you have to be to SHOW the fuck UP...? for yourself and/or others?
I think that may be the key.

Cuz I never questioned my lot in life...while i may cry and worry, i still dig in at the end of the whining and fears and just fucking DO IT!

Far too many people right now are either being tossed for the first time and whining that they can't deal with it or have just decided to put their heads in the sand and not see others struggling.Mostly though I think it has to do with that innate ability to just knuckle under and trod through the shit and handle stuff...or not. Some people just aren't cut out for the heavy lifting of this kind of growth.

and I can't be mad at them for it, even though it is dissapointing.
It's upsetting, because as much as I want to have the tantrum and refuse to show up, I *still* end up heaving myself into motion, or trying to grow through stuff...because there IS no other way for me... it has to be done. Call me OCD :rofl:

so ya, the flake factor has to do with fear...
and maybe its a mirror for us that choose to do the 'heavy lifting,' about why we make the choice to show up afterall....