Aren’t You Denying Your Children The Opportunity to Be Religious?

[cleanhippie]

There’s a good joke about Unitarian Universalists. Q: “What’s a Unitarian Universalist?” A: “An Atheist with children.”

Apart from being funny, the joke pinpoints a growing phenomenon in our society. Many people who were brought up in major denominations are no longer affiliated with those denominations. Secularity is growing in all regions of the country, and secular folks are creating families. At some point, parents have to make some choices about the role religion will play in their child’s upbringing. These choices can be a source of anxiety to many parents.

For those who are religious, it is a no-brainer: the child will be taught at an early age to align with the parents’ beliefs, because they are “true,” they are integral to the teaching of morality, and, as many believe, it is important to dedicate an infant to their own brand of religion as soon as possible, in the case of a an untimely childhood death. However, for many of us who are not religious, or who do not subscribe to supernatural beliefs, these “no-brainers” do not apply.

In my household, although my wife and I are not religious, we feel it is crucial that we raise religiously literate children. Unless children are homeschooled, or otherwise isolated, they will stumble into any number of religious conversations, or be asked religious questions. They will ask questions themselves. Whether or not we like it, religion informs every aspect of life: politics, foreign policy, education, art, and so on. The histories and the beliefs of world religions are as important as the histories and political systems of governments.

Although we don’t pray or belong to a church, we do not shield our children from religion. As various religious holidays approach, we learn about them together, and use these moments as an opportunity to explore the beliefs of different religions. We take note of people here in our own community who may observe different religious holidays. We find ways to find meaning in these varying traditions as they might relate to our own lives, or to the lives of our neighbors.

--snip--

Many argue that by raising children in such a way does not ground them, or leads to confusion or a lack of identity. I would respond by stating that knowledge, literacy, open-mindedness, and compassion serve as a fine foundation for a child to shape their identity. This is a framework on which one can layer any philosophy or religious belief. We don’t feel that we are in any way denying our children the opportunity to will be religious. In fact, we would argue the opposite. Their religious beliefs, like ours, will be determined by their life experiences, and by the knowledge they accumulate as they navigate through these experiences.

http://parentingbeyondbelief.com/parents/?p=194

-----------------------------------------------------------------------

I guess there is some truth to that joke in the opener, as I, and much of my UU congregation are atheist. That aside, this is the exact ideology that my wife and I are trying to infuse into our daughter; that reason, rational thought, inquiry, and a solid, objective exposure to all religions will make her a well adjusted person that thinks for herself. We will love and cherish her REGARDLESS of what she chooses to believe, as we can be confident that SHE arrived at those beliefs on her own, not because we instructed her to do so or indoctrinated (or brainwashed, if you will) her with our particular brand of religion (if we had one, that is) as so many religious parents do.