I no longer fear hell for I have watched 'The Golden Compass'

[underpants]

all 2 hours of it

Wow that had to be the most contrived, simplistic, over written, over directed, patronizing 120 minutes of childlike story telling in the history of cinema

Is it really necessary to have characters explain who people are as they are introduced? Is it really necessary to flash an image of the place people are talking about so we little dummies can hope to understand? Can Terry Gilliam get his sets back?

I got the messge about the church in fact I got that pretty much in the first 5 minutes. Was the whole Dickens-street-urchin part really necessary?

I need to write a book. Clearly they will film just about anything these days as long as there are mystic worlds involved. Flying cowboys and armored bears??? And how long WAS that witch's name anyway? that could have cut a good 5 minutes of this crapfest right there.

Oh and having TWO members of the LoTR trilogy really didn't help neither did the surprise surprise about the parents...:eyes: think I have heard that one before (at least that was a western set in space not a pile of dung in the wintry north)