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Reply #17: etiquette demands that the asking person disclose themselves first, [View All]

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Rabrrrrrr Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Mar-16-07 11:37 AM
Response to Reply #13
17. etiquette demands that the asking person disclose themselves first,
not ask the askee to disclose themselves first.

It's just simple manners - declare your intentions, then ask if they are available.

You don't send a notice out to wedding invitees asking "What are you doing September 15?" and demand that they write back, and then, if they aren't doing anything, or if you think what they're doing is lame, send them an invitation.

So why do it face to face?

Rudeness is rudeness.

Just say "I'd like to hang out with you Friday night - are you available?"
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  -If you ask people "what are you doing on _____", you should know that people hate you. LoZoccolo  Mar-15-07 09:40 PM   #0 
  - So are trying to say tomorrow night is not good for you?  Generic Brad   Mar-15-07 09:44 PM   #1 
  - What are you doing on May 23, 2012?  whoisalhedges   Mar-15-07 09:46 PM   #2 
  - Dude, wait, what?  crispini   Mar-15-07 11:38 PM   #3 
  - That is slightly better, but still rude.  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 12:14 AM   #6 
  - It's not black and white though  Truthiness Inspector   Mar-15-07 11:45 PM   #4 
  - I like that word, "time-trapper".  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 10:11 AM   #12 
  - Have No Idea How That Works  REP   Mar-15-07 11:55 PM   #5 
  - The right wording.  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 12:15 AM   #7 
     - I'll Keep That In Mind The Next Time I Care  REP   Mar-16-07 12:18 AM   #8 
        - You are welcome.  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 12:27 AM   #9 
  - So THAT's why people hate me.  mycritters2   Mar-16-07 12:35 AM   #10 
  - People ain't no good.  swag   Mar-16-07 12:36 AM   #11 
  - so what you're really saying is that I am not ok to just hang out with  unpossibles   Mar-16-07 10:16 AM   #13 
  - etiquette demands that the asking person disclose themselves first,  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 11:37 AM   #17 
  - Score one for molehills  Richardo   Mar-16-07 11:28 AM   #14 
  - ?  Blue-Jay   Mar-16-07 11:33 AM   #15 
  - I recognize the exact episode that screen shot came from  liontamer   Mar-16-07 04:40 PM   #26 
     - Looks like the one he's reciting love poetry to Lwaxana  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 04:42 PM   #27 
        - Thank you for out-geeking me.  Blue-Jay   Mar-16-07 04:45 PM   #29 
        - LOL!  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 04:46 PM   #31 
           - You are the Bele to my Lokai.  Blue-Jay   Mar-16-07 04:51 PM   #32 
              - Ah, the skin of evil draws tighter. Soon I will be the last outpost of geekdom  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 04:55 PM   #34 
        - exactly! n/t  liontamer   Mar-16-07 09:29 PM   #48 
  - Absolutely right. The proper way is to ask "Are you available?"  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 11:34 AM   #16 
  - Also if you call someone and begin the conversation with:  Fran Kubelik   Mar-16-07 11:38 AM   #18 
  - I always think that's polite.  crispini   Mar-16-07 04:46 PM   #30 
     - I ask people that, or something similar, straight off  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 05:04 PM   #37 
     - oh...whoops  Fran Kubelik   Mar-16-07 11:05 PM   #51 
  - I still don't get this.  Midlodemocrat   Mar-16-07 11:39 AM   #19 
  - That's fucking ridiculous.  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 11:40 AM   #20 
  - ...  Susang   Mar-16-07 04:23 PM   #23 
  - Heya susang  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 05:02 PM   #36 
  - It's not ridiculous - it's called MANNERS. Etiquette. Hospitality.  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 04:29 PM   #24 
     - Deleted message  Name removed   Mar-16-07 05:00 PM   #35 
        - Wow - you really piled on me for stuff I didn't even say.  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 05:05 PM   #38 
        - I was referring to both you and the OP  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 09:15 PM   #45 
        - Ettiquette, in large part, is intended to avoid such conflicts.  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 05:05 PM   #39 
           - Spot on and well said!  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 05:08 PM   #40 
           - Exactly, and as I grow older...  crispini   Mar-16-07 05:18 PM   #41 
              - You are correct - while some might think they "don't mind" rude behavior,  Rabrrrrrr   Mar-16-07 05:22 PM   #42 
           - What a load of horseshit.  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 09:16 PM   #46 
           - Funny.  GirlinContempt   Mar-16-07 09:23 PM   #47 
  - To me  realisticphish   Mar-16-07 01:14 PM   #21 
  - Worst case scenario: >  Gidney N Cloyd   Mar-16-07 03:42 PM   #22 
  - Stupid shit like this is why I'm glad I don't have a social life. n/t  Mojambo   Mar-16-07 04:37 PM   #25 
  - can't you just reply "not sure, why?"  liontamer   Mar-16-07 04:43 PM   #28 
  - I could.  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 04:54 PM   #33 
  - Are you sure you're directing this rant to the right people?  Lex   Mar-16-07 05:29 PM   #43 
  - Evidently, for some people, yes!  LoZoccolo   Mar-16-07 07:56 PM   #44 
  - If you're so uptight that shit like this bothers you, you should know that people hate you too.  primate1   Mar-16-07 10:32 PM   #49 
  - So  LeftyMom   Mar-16-07 10:36 PM   #50 
     - Hee!  Fran Kubelik   Mar-16-07 11:06 PM   #52 
 

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