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sweetheart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Aug-01-03 06:39 AM
Response to Original message
10. pissed off... ?
Certainly i plan to ultimately leave by suicide, but it will look like an accident when that occurrs... as i have no plans to die in some hospital, so while i can still walk as a free spirit, i'll be away off some cliff somewhere.... they'll find me missing and maybe never find my body... but those who would notice will know.

My religion says not the state of mind you die in, is the one you reincarnate in, and to die depressed and morbid is a ticket to a lower birth like in an american ghetto. Certainly, i would rather die consciously and leave everything for a long moment of recapitulation... to surrender all that this body loves... and in that peace... the end of just another life.

Another option if i'm really feeling heroic is an immolation suicide on the steps of capital hill, like some heroic buddhists in viet nam protesting a sick evil america... but they'd probably arrest me as a terrorist in my gasoline-drenched clothes. :-)

The only thing i would NEVER do, is *fail* to committ suicide. Methinks that is a cry for attention, something quite different. As i have a typical american's ability to provide for my old age (none), when i stop working i'll jump. There is nobody to stick around for, and certainly the world does not need another liberal mouth that refuses to wear slave chains. I relate to rambo in this monologue at the end of "first blood" and like the replicant rutger hauer "i've seen things..... time to die." To become wise and funny in our culture is to become disenfranchised, and rather than be a burden, why be around when no element in the culture will employ one.

I'm not suicidal, just practical... no hurry, no worries... the sun sets at the end of the day, its hardly something to be angry about.
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